Transcript
Conflict Management
GEO BABYSNGIST
Conflict
What is it?
A Disagreement Between Two or More Parties Who Perceive They Have Incompatible Concerns
Conflict
Why do we do it?
What we know…. Conflict is a naturally occurring
phenomenon for human beings People do not get involved in conflict
situations unless they have some stake in the relationship or outcome or both
Facts Methods Goals Values
Conflict
Why do we care?
Study of American Management association
24% of executive time is on CM Conflict management ability is a key
competency The topic gains great importance
Causes Misunderstanding Personality clashes Value and Goal difference Substandard performance Difference over method Responsibility issues Lack of cooperation
Causes Authority issues Frustration and irritability Competition for limited resources Non-compliance with rules and
responsibilities
What we know…. The costs of unmanaged conflict can be
high, but the gains from using differences creatively can also be great
Conflict can either be functional or dysfunctional
Dysfunctional Diverts energy from real task Destroys morale Polarize individuals and groups Deepens differences Obstruct cooperative action Produce irresponsible actions Create suspision and di
Functional Opens up issue in a confronting manner Develops clarification of an issue Improve problem solving quality Increase involvement Improve communication Initiate growth Strengthens a relationship Increase productivity
First Trick for Conflict Management
Know Yourself
What feelings do you have when you are in
conflict situation?
Common Feelings Associated with Conflict
AngerFrustration
FearExcitement
Common Actions Associated with Conflict
Fight Flight
Your History with Conflict How was conflict perceived in your
family/community? How did your family/community
deal with conflict?
You can decide... Understanding the impact of your
family and community on your ideas about conflict can allow you to make decisions about how you deal with conflict now
We are our history We make our history
What is your conflict style?
Conflict StylesRELATIONSHIP
High Importance
Low ImportanceHighImportance
GOALS
3 5
1 2
4
Conflict StylesRELATIONSHIP
High Importance
Low ImportanceHighImportance
GOALS
3 5
1--Turtle 2
4
Turtle--Withdrawing Avoid conflict as all costs Give up their personal goals &
relationships Believe it is hopeless to try to resolve
conflict Feel helpless Easier to withdraw than face conflict
Conflict StylesRELATIONSHIP
High Importance
Low ImportanceHighImportance
GOALS
3 5
1 2--Shark
4
Shark--Forcing Try to overpower opponents by forcing
them to accept their solutions Not concerned with needs of others Do not care about how others perceive them Believe in winning and losing Winning gives them a sense of pride Try to win by attacking, overwhelming, &
intimidating others
Conflict StylesRELATIONSHIP
High Importance
Low ImportanceHighImportance
GOALS
3--Teddy Bear 5
1 2
4
Teddy Bear--Smoothing Relationships most important, goals of
little importance Want to be accepted and liked by other
people Believe conflict should be avoided in
favor of harmony Fearful that conflict will hurt someone
Conflict StylesRELATIONSHIP
High Importance
Low ImportanceHighImportance
GOALS
3 5
1 2
4--Fox
Fox--Compromising Moderately concerned with relationships
and goals Willing to sacrifice part of their goals
and relationships in order to find agreement for the common good
Conflict StylesRELATIONSHIP
High Importance
Low ImportanceHighImportance
GOALS
3 5--Owl
1 2
4
Owl--Confronting Value their own goals and relationships View conflicts as problems to be solved See conflicts as improving relationships
by reducing tension Seek solutions that satisfy both parties Not satisfied until solution is found and
tension is reduced
Which style is better?
Some styles are more useful than others
when...
Uses of the “Turtle” When issue is trivial When potential damage of confrontation
outweighs the benefits To let people cool down & reduce tension When gathering information When others can resolve the conflict
more effectively
Uses of the “Shark” When quick, decisive action is vital On important issues where unpopular
actions need to be implemented To protect yourself against people who
take advantage of noncompetitive behavior
Uses of “Teddy Bear” When you realize you are wrong To learn from others When issue is more important to the
other person than to yourself As a goodwill gesture to maintain
cooperative relationship To allow others to experiment
Uses of “Fox” When goals are important, but not worth
the effort or disruption When opponents with equal power are
strongly committed To achieve temporary settlements to
complex issues
Uses of “Owl” To find an integrative solution when both
sides are too important to compromise When your objective is to learn To work through hard feelings which
have been interfering with a relationship
Second Trick for Conflict Management
Understand Process of Conflict
Expectations (explicit)
Anticipation (implicit)Experience Unfulfilled
Expectations
Resentments Build
Gather evidence for a case
Give up
intervene
Why & how do we get in conflict situations?
The issues The facts: present situation, problems The goals: how things ought to be, the
future conditions sought The methods: the best, the easiest, the
quickest, the most ethical The values: the beliefs about priorities
that should be observed in choosing goals & methods
The history: what has gone on before
Components of a Conflict Situation
Frustration--when you feel blocked. Conceptualization of problem-- “What’s
going on?” Conceptualization of behaviors &
intentions-- “What does that mean?” Outcome--emotional, cognitive,
behavioral
What can we do???How do we intervene???
Accept that you will have conflict Work toward having functional vs.
dysfunctional conflict Use conflict management skills
– De-escalation– “I”- Messages
Indicators of Escalation Competition Not Listening Spreading to new
issues
Dealing in personalities
Threats Intentional Hurt Violating Social
Rules
Indicators of De-escalation Listening. Trying
to understand. Showing Tact.
Concern for other’s feelings.
Goodwill gestures.
Appeals to De-escalate.
Airing feelings. Finding
alternatives.
“I”-Messages
Describe: Behavior Feelings ConsequenceBeware of war words!!
Analyzing a Conflict Situation
Conflict was between________ It centered around_________ I wanted___________ and felt frustrated because __________ In my view, the key issue was _______ The other person probably thought the
key issue was ___________
Analyzing a Conflict Situation
Predominant conflict style I used_____ Escalation behaviors I used________ De-escalation behaviors I used______ Major outcomes_____________ Differences over: facts, goals, methods,
values, history___________ What would I do differently next time?
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