1 COURT CLINIC ORIENTATION Welcome to the Family Court Clinic Orientation This presentation has been designed to help you understand the functions of the.

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COURT CLINIC ORIENTATION

Welcome to the Family Court Clinic Orientation

This presentation has been designed to help you understand the functions

of theFamily Court Clinic of the

Second Judicial District Court

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COURT CLINIC ORIENTATION

The Family Court Clinic provides services to individuals referred to the Court Clinic by a Court Order.

The Clinic addresses child custody issues in cases filed in Bernalillo County.

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Type of Cases Referred to the Court Clinic

Divorce Cases: the parties were married and had a child together.

Parentage Cases: the parties were NOT married but had a child together.

Domestic Violence Cases: allegations of domestic violence in the parties relationship.

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Court Clinic Referral Order

The cases that are seen at the Court Clinic are referred to the Clinic by a Court Clinic Referral Order (“CCRO”).

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Processes and Procedures

On Call Consultation

Priority Consultation (“PC”)

Mediation

Advisory Consultation (“AC”)

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On Call Consultation

An “On Call Consultation” occurs when a judicial officer requests assistance from the Court Clinic during a hearing.

The Consultation could be conducted on the day of the hearing or at a later date. The clinician will assist the parties in reaching an agreement, or will otherwise make suggestions to the Court.

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Priority Consultation

All custody and timesharing recommendations are guided by the best interest of the child(ren).

“Priority Consultation" means that the Court has requested specific information through a brief assessment regarding the parenting situation and recommendations regarding temporary arrangements.

The Priority Consultation will be conducted at a later date, usually within three (3) weeks,of the Order being entered.

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Mediation

Mediations are conducted by mediators who have education and experience in psychology, social work, marriage, family and child counseling or related fields with special training in working with families in conflict, domestic violence and custody related issues.

The purpose of the Domestic Relations Mediation Act is to assist the Court, parents and other interested parties in determining the best interests of the child(ren) involved in domestic matters cases.

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Mediation

Mediation is a meeting between both parties and a neutral third person. The role of the mediator is to facilitate the parties in reaching an agreement. The mediator does not represent either party, and remains impartial.

You and the other party will each present your proposals for form of custody and timesharing, and other issues, and will negotiate to attempt to reach an agreement.

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Who should attend Mediation?

It is not advisable to bring friends, current boyfriends, girlfriends, spouses, partners, your children or relatives to mediation. The mediation process will include only the parties.

If you are represented by an attorney, he or she will not be included in the mediation process.

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What Mediation Will Not Address

There are some matters that we cannot address in Mediation. These include:Giving Legal AdviceChild SupportSpousal SupportDivision of Property

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Child(ren) in Mediation

The Court Clinic clinician may use his or her discretion in deciding if it is necessary to interview your child(ren).

If it is appropriate and necessary to interview your child(ren), with the agreement of the parties, the Court Clinic clinician will schedule an appointment to speak alone with your child(ren) or to have another clinician speak with your child.

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Child(ren) in Mediation

The mediators are trained to work sensitively with child(ren) in these matters.

The child(ren) are not asked to choose sides or to choose between parents.

The mediator will gather information from the child(ren) regarding their thoughts, feelings and concerns.

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Getting the Most Out of Mediation

Give careful thought to a parenting plan that will work for your child(ren). Designing the parenting plan should include the active participation of both parents.

Please come prepared. There is no substitute for preparation.

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Getting the Most Out of Mediation

Many parents find it helpful to write out a schedule and bring it to mediation.

Think through the details of the average day.

Think of special circumstances: holidays, vacations, transportation and exchange locations.

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What if there is a Restraining Order?

If there is an Order of Protection protecting you from the other party and/or if domestic violence has occurred, you may request to meet with the mediator separately from the other party.

If you meet together with the other party, the mediator will work to create an environment that is safe and will permit you to be heard.

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Restraining Order

If you have an Order of Protection there is a separate waiting area at the Family Court Clinic. If you are still uncomfortable, you may request to wait in another area until mediation begins.

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Confidential Mediation

Mediation proceedings shall be held in private and shall be confidential.

All communications, verbal or written, from the parties to the mediator shall be inadmissible in any Court hearing.

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Confidential Mediation

No report of the personal content of mediation shall be made to the Court, or the attorney for either party. The mediator shall inform the Court by written notice the result of the mediation session. If the mediation process is successful, the agreement shall become a parenting plan.

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Confidential Mediation

If a full mediated agreement cannot be reached, the unresolved issues shall proceed to the Court for a hearing.

At the hearing the Court shall rule on how the case will proceed (i.e. Priority Consultation, Advisory Consultation,

Rule 11-706 evaluation, Court ruling, etc.)

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Confidential Mediation

For additional information, please refer to the “Confidential Mediation at the Court Clinic Information Sheet” which is attached to your questionnaire.

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Confidential Mediation

Please be aware that Clinicians are mandated by federal and state laws to report to the appropriate authorities any suspicion of child abuse or any instance of suspected risk of harm to yourself or others.

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Advisory Consultation

“Advisory Consultation" means an assessment about the parenting situation and a brief written report summarizing the information for the attorneys and the Court.

The process includes an assessment of the positions, situations and relationships of family members and recommendations regarding specific plans, general issues or requested action.

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Advisory Consultation Fee

There is a fee associated with the Advisory Consultation process which is based on each party’s gross monthly income and the number of children involved in the case.

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Rule 11-706 Evaluation

The Court may Order the appointment of a Rule 11-706 Evaluator. This is an evaluation conducted by a private psychologist not associated with the Court Clinic. This professional will conduct a child custody evaluation and provide an extensive report with recommendations.

Both Advisory Consultations and a Rule 11-706 evaluation can be lengthy, time-

consuming and costly to the parties.

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Physical Custody

“Physical custody" means the physical care and supervision of a child(ren).

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Sole Legal vs. Joint Legal Custody

Sole legal custody gives one parent authority to make decisions.

Joint legal custody permits both parents to be involved in decision making for the child or children.

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Joint Legal Custody

Joint Legal Custody means an Order of the Court awarding decision-making of a child(ren) to both parents.

Joint legal custody does not imply an equal division of the child's time between the parents or an equal division of financial responsibility for the child.

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Joint Legal Custody Determination

The law in New Mexico states that there shall be a presumption that joint legal custody is in the best interest of a child in an initial custody determination.

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An Award of Joint Legal Custody

When joint legal custody is awarded, the Court shall approve a parenting plan.

The parenting plan shall include a division of a child's time and care into periods of responsibility for each parent. It may also include the following:

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An Award of Joint Legal Custody

(1) statements regarding the child's religion, education, child care, recreational activities, counseling and medical and dental care;

(2) designation of specific decision-making methods;

(3) methods of communicating information about the child, transporting the child, exchanging care for the child and maintaining telephone and mail contact between parent and child;

(4) procedures for future problem-solving, including procedures for dispute resolution;

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Joint Legal Custody means:

(1) each parent shall have significant, well-defined periods of responsibility with their child;

(2) each parent shall have, be allowed and expected to carry out, responsibility for their child's financial, physical, emotional and developmental needs during each parent's periods of responsibility;

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Joint Legal Custody means:

(3) the parents shall consult with each other on major decisions involving their child before implementing those decisions; that is, neither parent shall make a decision or take an action which results in a major change in a child's life until the matter has been discussed with the other parent and the parents agree.

If the parents, after discussion, cannot agree and if one parent wishes to effect a major change while the other parent does not wish the major change to occur, then NO change shall occur until the issue has been resolved;

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Joint Legal Custody means:

(4) the following guidelines apply to major changes in a child's life:

(a) plans to change the child(ren)’s city or state of residence.

(b) the child(ren)’s religious denomination and religious activities, or lack thereof.

(c) both parents shall have access to school records, teachers and activities.

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Joint Legal Custody means:

(d) both parents shall have access to, counseling, medical and dental treatment providers and information, as deemed appropriate by the provider. Major elective medical or dental treatment must be agreed upon by both parents;

(e) both parents may attend their child's activities and both parents should know the current schedules. Also, neither parent may enroll the child(ren) in a new recreational activity unless the parties agree;

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Joint Legal Custody decisions

(5) decisions regarding major changes in a child's life may be decided by:

(a) discussion and agreement between the joint custodial parents;

(b) the parents seek family counseling, conciliation or mediation services to assist in resolving their differences;

(c) agreement between the parents to submit the dispute to binding arbitration;

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Joint Legal Custody decisions

(d) allocating ultimate responsibility for a particular major decision area to one parent;

(e) terminating joint legal custody and awarding sole custody to one person;

(f) reference to a master; or (g) the District Court Judge making a ruling.

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Sole Legal Custody

Sole Legal Custody means an Order of the Court awarding custody of and decision making over a child(ren) to only one parent.

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Period of Responsibility

“Period of Responsibility" means a specified period of time during which a parent is responsible for providing for a child(ren)'s physical, developmental and emotional needs, including the decision making required in daily living. Specified periods of responsibility shall not be unilaterally changed in an instance or more permanently.

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Primary Residence

Primary residence is defined as the city and state in which the child(ren)resides.

Primary residence is not the parent with whom the child lives or the home in which the child resides.

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Timesharing and Visitation

Timesharing and visitation is the period of responsibility that the children have with each parent.

Visitation means a period of time available to a non-custodial parent, under a sole custody arrangement.

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Parenting Plan

Parenting Plan means a document submitted for approval by the Court setting forth the responsibilities of each parent, individually and jointly in a joint custody arrangement;

When a parenting plan is written and signed by a judge, it becomes a Court Order.

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Relocation of Custodial Parent

In situations in which one parent has sole custody of the child, the parent seeking to relocate with a child is entitled to a presumption that the move is in the best interests of the child.

The burden is on the non-custodial parent to show that the move is against those interests or motivated by bad faith on the part of the custodial parent.

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Child Developmental Needs

A parenting plan must take into consideration the age and emotional stage of development of each child.

A child can make the decision about which parents he wishes to live with when he reaches the age of majority, which in the State of New Mexico is 18 years old.

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Infants and Toddlers: 0-3 years

Developmental tasks Bonding to parental

figures Physiological rhythms Basic Trust Exploration from a

secure base

Important to provide Basic caretaking Continuity and consistency Limited number of caretakers

and change Safety Nurturance

High Stress Signals Excessive fretfulness and crying Sleeping, eating, digestive problems Failure to gain weight and thrive Apathy, nightmares, regression Major prolonged upset with transitions Delayed development

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Preschool: 3-5 years

Developmental tasks Autonomy Safe separations and

reunions Peer relationships Impulse management Time lasts forever

Important to provide Firm limits Safety Support their ideas & feelings Reassurance & explanations Consistent social settings

High Stress Signals Regression Development lags Excessive aggression Withdrawal and depression Extreme neediness Prolonged crying at transitions

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Elementary: 6-12 years

Developmental tasks Increase involvement

outside family Competence Fairness Self-esteem Logical reasoning

Important to provide Insulation from parental

conflicts Keep your promises Continuity of friends and school Time for talk and listening Flexibility to make child’s

events a priority

High Stress Signals Trouble getting involved in activities School problems Denial and Splitting Anxiety and Moodiness Aggression and Depression

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Teenage: 13-18 years

Developmental tasks Separation and

independence Identity Sexual identity Abstract thought

Important to provide Age appropriate limits Allow responsibility &

independence Respect for individuality Negotiation

High Stress Signals Depression Withdrawal Suicidal thoughts Splitting and manipulation of parents School problems Substance abuse and dangerous behaviors

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Children’s Reactions

If the child returns from visiting the other parent angry and/or upset, it may not be the fault of the other parent, rather the child may be acting out because he/she senses the tension and unhappiness between his/her parents or simply it may reflect the child(ren)’s needs.

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Parental Cooperation

The first year following the separation is a critical time for children. Parents may be more distracted, and routines may be disrupted. Everyone, including the child, is struggling to find a new balance.

Reassure your child that there will be an on-going relationship with each parent and shield your child from the parental conflict.

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Children Exposed to Conflict

Studies show that children do best when parents cooperate with each other following separation and divorce.

Children who have long-term emotional problems and relationship difficulties later in life usually have been exposed to on-going conflict and animosity between their parents while they were children or felt that they did not have access to the other parent when a good reason was not apparent to them.

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"FACTS" ABOUT DIVORCE

Divorce is always painful for children, no matter how old they are.

Divorce does not end the relationship between you and your spouse, it changes the rules of the relationship.

You are not the only parents going through divorce.

You do not have to hate your spouse to get divorced.

The divorce takes place psychologically for children on the day of the separation.

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"FACTS" ABOUT DIVORCE

When parents live apart, children have more opportunities to manipulate them.

It is hard when children cannot spend time with someone they love, they are always missing someone.

A parent should not become a "friend" to their child or children and a child should not become a parent to their parents or their siblings.

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"FACTS" ABOUT DIVORCE

Child support payments are intended to support your children.

Unhappy parents cannot raise happy children. Courts do not want to place children with a parent

who is systematically trying to destroy the other parent’s relationship with the child(ren).

Never ask a child to decide who he or she wants to live with, children cannot deal with the parental conflict.

Two people living apart cannot live as cheaply as two people living together.

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"FACTS" ABOUT DIVORCE

You should be willing to do whatever you want your spouse (or ex-spouse) to do. Remember The Golden Rule.

The more consistency parents provide in their children's lives, the healthier the children's adjustment will be.

The more flexibility a parent has regarding placement and visitation arrangements, the more comfortable children are likely to be.

Divorce is a process, not an event.

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"FACTS" ABOUT DIVORCE

Children of all ages, who witness family violence of any kind, are emotionally traumatized.

Children need to be emotionally and physical safe from parental conflict.

Children need a relationship with both parents. All children need consistency and stability from

both parents. Children do better if they know when they will be

spending time with each parent.

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"FACTS" ABOUT DIVORCE

Parents who make their own mutual decisions regarding a parenting plan are less likely to need future Court involvement and are generally happy with the outcome.

You may not have had a good marriage, but, you can have a good divorce.

WINNING IS NEVER MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE WELL-BEING OF YOUR CHILDREN.