Gravity Falls Episode 15.5

7/28/2019 Gravity Falls Episode 15.5

http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/gravity-falls-episode-155 1/38

GRAVITY FALLS

EPISODE 15.5"There's Something About Sasquatch"

Written by

Nic Lishko



TEASER

EXT. THE MYSTERY HACK - AFTERNOON - ESTABLISHING

A crystal clear day. Jeff the gnome runs towards the shack,

but is SMACKED by a passing mail truck. He “EEEEE’s” as heflies through the air.

INT. SHACK - GIFT SHOP - CONTINUOUS

A mystery shack ornament (complete with missing ‘s’) is hungon a tree by MABEL.

MABELThere. Perfect!

The tree is actually SOOS standing on the checkout table.

WENDY wraps a colorful ribbon around Soos.

MABEL (CONT’D)And a Happy Soosmas Day was had byall!

Soos admires his decorations.

SOOSCheck it out! I’m a Soosmas Tree!I guess you really CAN be anything when you grow up!

DIPPER enters, reading a book: “Amateur Lock-picking forPeople who aren’t Thieves”

DIPPERMabel, Christmas is months away, what are you guys doing?

WENDYChillax gov’na. We’re just playinga round of truth or dare.

DIPPER

REeeaaalllyy? You know, I’m quitethe truth or dare master. Peopleback at school crowned me championthis past year. They even said inthe yearbook “most likely to win intruth or dare.”

SOOSDipper in the shack! Dude, truthor dare?



DIPPERTruth! Because I always tell thetruth.

SOOSWho is your secret crush?

Wendy immediately has a dreamy pink aura surrounding her.

EXTREME CLOSE-UP on Dipper’s face.

DIPPERI DON’T WANT TO PLAY ANYMORE.

GRUNKLE STAN bursts through the front door.

STANMail call! A postcard for Soos...

Stan looks at the Soosmas tree and slides the postcard inbetween Soos’ fingers.

SOOSOh boy! Mom’s been on vacation inthe Bahamas. Look at her go!

The postcard shows Soos’ mom vacuuming the beach.

STAN...A package for Dipper from yourparents and the Gravity FallsGossiper.

DIPPER(looks to Gossiper)

Whoa. A blurry, shady,overpixelated picture of Sasquatchon the cover? I knew he was real!

MABELSasquatch? Pha! That’sridiculous. Who believes in thatkind of junk?

STANAnd finally...A Merman’s MonthlyDigest for...Who is Blame Spine?

MABELI’LL THROW THAT AWAY FOR YOU!

Mabel grabs the magazine and bolts out of the room. Wendychecks out Dipper’s Gossiper.

2.



WENDYDude, Sasquatch is on the cover?That’s sick! He is so retro.

DIPPERDo you um...like Sasquatch?

WENDYHeck yeah! I mean, I’d love to seea clear picture of the guy, buteither way, Sasquatch is totallyretro and retro is in.

STANAm I retro?

WENDYNah. You’re groovy or possibly oldtimey. Both of which are out.

STANYou know who’s out? You. As inYOU are OUTside cleaning thegutters for a paycheck. ZING!

Stan passes Wendy cleaning supplies. Wendy frowns as theyboth go outside. Dipper opens the package and pulls out aletter and a camcorder.

DIPPER(reads letter)

Dear Dipper and Mabel, we hope you

are having fun in Gravity Falls andare on your best behavior.

Soos falls over, SMASHING several shelves of merchandise.

SOOSCan someone grab the star? It’s ina place I can’t reach!

DIPPER(back to letter)

We wanted to get a taste of the

things you kids are up to, so we’resending you our old video camera inthe hopes that you’ll send us backsome great footage of you two.Take care, love, Mom and Dad.

Dipper looks at the camera and the cover of the Gossiper.

3.



DIPPER (CONT’D)This is perfect! I’ll get ACTUALfootage of Sasquatch and then Wendy will think I’m super retro!

SOOS

You’re not retro dude. You’re morelike...Dipper.

DIPPERIs that in?

SOOSI don’t know man. I can’t keep up with you YOLO kids and yourconstantly changing catch phrases.

Stan enters.

STANPhew! Man, it’s really Dipperoutside today.

DIPPERWhat does that mean?

STANWhat it sounds like. Hey! Whathappened to the merchandise?

Stan runs to Soos. Off Dipper’s perplexed expression --

MAIN TITLES

END TEASER

4.



ACT ONE

OVER BLACK

TEXT appears ON SCREEN and is read by a NARRATOR.

NARRATOR (V.O.)In July of 2013, a boy named Dipperattempted to get video proof of aSasquatch in order to impress agirl. He lost the footage when agoat took it, but then later foundit, only to have Mabel steal theunedited footage. After a brieffight, the twins ended up gettingtrapped inside of the Television.Once they escaped and learned avaluable lesson about respectingeach others property, Dipper

discovered that the footage wasrecorded over by Grunkle Stan who was taping the very movie the twins were captured in, ‘The DuchessDisapproves,’ an unremarkablesequel to the classic. Unbeknownstto Dipper and at some point inbetween the goat and the TVincident, the footage was capturedon a computer and forgottenabout...UNTIL NOW...

(NOTE: The rest of the episode will be shown from the POV ofDipper’s camera unless otherwise noted. More often than not,the footage is often shaky and doesn’t always show the fullpicture of what’s going on)

INT. DIPPER AND MABEL’S ROOM - MORNING

Dipper flips on the video camera and points it at himself.

DIPPERToday is July 19th, 2013 and today

I go on a hunt for Sasquatch.(reads from journal)Many have attempted to get even thetiniest piece of evidence showingthe existence of this creature, butall have failed. Now, it’sDipper’s time to shine.

5.



MABELAnd in order to shine, you gottahave glorious hair!

Reveal Mabel, brushing Dipper’s hair and putting in hairpins.

DIPPERCan I help you with something?

MABELNah, I got this. Your hair is likesoft clay I’m molding into a great masterpiece. MY masterpiece. Alsoare you going to be recordingeverything we do from now on?

DIPPERThink of it this way Mabel: You’rethe star in the movie we’ll be

sending Mom and Dad!

MABELReally? My finest moment! A dayin the life of Blame Spine! I mean, Mabel Pines! That’s myactual name...and Waddles!

Mabel pulls Waddles into frame, but Waddles snout SMACKS thecamera, knocking it over. Waddles OINK OINKS. The cameragoes to STATIC for a moment --

INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS

-- and resumes recording on Dipper’s shoes entering thekitchen. He whips around to Mabel and Waddles who wave.

MABELWhoa! Pancakes and eggs and toast?Did we do something right?

Grunkle Stan at the stove whips around to the camera and waves his spatula. He wears an apron reading “Tip the Cook.”

STANWhy, hello my dear children! Nospecial occasion! I always makeyou kids a healthy breakfast withplenty of nutrients and antioxygensor whatever people think is goodfor kids these days. Now who wantssome crispy baccc...

Mabel and Waddles appear HORRIFIED.

6.



STAN (CONT’D)...aaakeedd potates! They’re likehashbrowns without the effort!

DIPPERAlright Grunkle Stan, what’s really

going on here?

STANNothing! We’re just going to do afamily fun thing today! Dipper will you put that camera down for asecond and stop recordi --

A quick jump of STATIC, immediately followed by the camera onits side, recording Stan next to the dinner table.

STAN (CONT’D)--you two on my team for the Tri-

Annual Acorn Syruping Festivaltoday. Tourists go crazy for acornsyrup which means big bucks for thehack.

DIPPERYou mean the shack?

STANIs that what the sign out frontsays?

MABEL

I’ve never had acorn syrup. Itsounds...nutty.

STANNot just nutty, but delicious! AndI have a secret weapon that willguarantee my victory: The GreatWhite Oak. Best acorns for syrupever! Anyway, the winner gets ablue ribbon and I would sell therest for tons of cash. What do yasay?

DIPPERMaybe next time Grunkle Stan.

STANCome on kid, I’ve never won. Ialways get so close, but I getsabotaged every time. I even havephotographic evidence.

7.



Stan slaps a stack of photos by the camera. Dipper goesthrough the photos and flips the camera upright.

Each photo shows Stan’s table and syrup getting destroyed andin each photo, there are two mysterious figures wearingtrench coats running away from the destruction.

MABELWho would do such a thing?

STANI have my suspicions. I’m thinkingit’s the Northwest family.

MABELPACIFICA...Say no more GrunkleStan. Waddles and I are in.

DIPPER

Maybe next time. I’m trying to getfootage of Sasquatch today.

MABELDipper, this is a chance to crushPacifica. You’re coming.

DIPPERI don’t need to crush Pacifica.

STANKid, you’re coming. It may beagainst your will, but so help

me...Wait, is that red light --

INT. GRUNKLE STAN’S CAR - MOMENTS LATER

The camera comes into focus on Stan. He picks his ear, looksat the ear wax, smells it and flicks it out the window.Mabel grabs the camera and points it on herself.

MABELToday on the Mabel and Waddlesshow, we’re making acorn syrup!

Once Dipper and I gather all theacorns, we’ll smash and mashPacifica in a similar fashion.

(ala Martha Stewart)It’s a good thing. Waddles, yourthoughts?

Waddles OINKS and STOMPS his hooves into the backseat.

8.



STANHey! Keep that pig under controlback there!

Dipper flips the camera on himself.

DIPPER(whispers)And while they do that, I’ll besecretly hunting the mightySasquatch.

STANDipper, we’re going into the woodsto make syrup and have family funtime. You can search for a made upcreature another time.

MABEL

I’m going to get first place andshove it in Pacifica’s face!

STANThat sounds like a selfish reasonto win. You’re like the daughter Ialways wanted!

DIPPERAnd I’m going to find Sasquatch to woo the heart of a ruby hairedvixen.

STANThat sounds like love. Nothing is more unselfish. I’ve got more workto do on you kid.

On Dipper’s frown --

EXT. A PARK IN THE WOODS - CONTINUOUS

Families from Gravity Falls are gathered, setting up tables,LAUGHING and having a great time. Everything about the

festival has an acorn theme, including an ice cream truckthat serves ice cream in giant acorn cups.

A banner hangs from the trees reading “Tri-Annual Acorn SyrupFestival.” Below that in small letters it says “A thing todo three times a year.”

Dipper pans over to Grunkle Stan, who struggles with anANCIENT MACHINE that is tied to the roof of his car.

9.



He finally pulls it off and it lands with a CRUNCH onto apicnic table.

STANCheck it out. My first acornsyruping machine. It crunches and

bottles all in one device. It was my Grunkle’s and his Grunkle’sbefore him.

PACIFICA (O.S.)Well well, if it isn’t the Pinesfamily, ready to be stomped yetagain.

PACIFICA enters.

STANDo my ears deceive me or is that

the sound of a dog toy gettingstepped on?

(looks to Pacifica)Oh, it’s you. I stand by my ears.

Dipper ZOOMS IN on Mabel’s glare.

MABELI hope your pillow is readyPacifica, because you’ll be cryinginto it all night after you lose!

PACIFICA

Please, my family has been makingthe best syrup for years. See?

Pacifica shows off her family’s picnic table, full oftrophies and an extremely high tech machine that’s so bright,everyone has to shield their eyes from the glare.

Mabel looks at the logo of the machine.

MABELThe iSyrup? By Peach? Whoeverheard of a fruit company making

high tech machines?PACIFICA

Apparently the same people who havenever won a blue ribbon for theiracorn syrup. Later losers!

Pacifica LAUGHS and leaves. Mabel SHOUTS to her.

10.



MABELThings are going to be differentthis time! Stan’s never had USbefore and this trusty old machine will pull through!

Mabel PATS the machine. The machine COUGHS and SPITS out aspring that SMACKS right into the camera, knocking Dipperonto the ground with an “OUCH!”

The camera adjusts IN and OUT of focus, looking at the sky.

DIPPER....Ohhhh...

Stan’s head pops in.

STANDid anyone see where that spring

went? Pretty sure I need that one.

EXT. MAIN STAGE - LATER

The camera flips on and focuses on a MAN standing at apodium. The camera has trouble focusing.

DIPPERWhat is wrong with this thing? It was working earlier.

MABEL

Look! It’s the Mayor!

DIPPERWe have a mayor?

People CHEER. Dipper whips the camera to the stage, focusingon a MAN, riding in on a buffalo. This is MAYOR HIRSCH(50’s, his beard is majestic, his suit, flannel).

MAYOR HIRSCHCitizens of Gravity Falls, welcometo the Tri-Annual Acorn Syrup

Festival!!More CHEERS and WOO HOOS!

Dipper PANS the camera around the crowd seeing the teams ofcompetitors including Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland, Old man McGucket and his son, The Northwest Family (Pacificasticks her tongue out at the camera) and the Corduroy family.

Wendy waves at the camera, causing Dipper to HYPERVENTILATE.

11.



Mabel gets in the frame.

MABELDipper! Get your head in the game!

MAYOR HIRSCH

Now before we get too excited,let’s go over the rules of thecontest. Every family gets onehour to make the tastiest of acornsyrups possible. My brain isexcited and my taste buds are readyto judge...

As Mayor Hirsch continues, Dipper notices TOBY DETERMINED,eating ice cream from an acorn cone. He sneaks over.

DIPPER(whispering)

PSST! TOBY!

TOBYGraah! Oh, it’s you. You scaredthe Dipper out of me!

DIPPERHow is that suddenly a thing now?Look, I need to know how and whereyou took that photo of theSasquatch that you put in thenewspaper.

TOBYMe? I didn’t take it.

DIPPERThen...Who did?

TOBYEvery photo I’ve gotten of theSasquatch was submitted by mail.It’s always a popular issue when Iget Sasquatch on the cover no matter how blurry it is.

DIPPERWow. So you’re saying that whoevergets a clear picture of Sasquatch would become a real popular guy?In theory.

Toby shrugs, causing his ice cream to fall off the cone.

12.



TOBYOhhh no! My acorn ice cream. Atleast I’ve still got the cone.

He bites down on it and CRUNCH go his teeth.

TOBY (CONT’D)Owww! It’s a real acorn? How dothey get so big?

Stan grabs Dipper and pulls him away.

DIPPERWhoooa, hey! What are you --

STANKid, I’m getting the feeling you’renot focusing in on family fun time.What were you two talking about?

DIPPERUh, nothing?

The camera focuses on Dipper and Stan looking down at theflip screen.

STANReally? Let me just rewind thisthing and see --

STATIC CUT TO:

A YOUNG DIPPER DANCES THE LAMBY DANCE FOR THE CAMERA.

CUT BACK TO:

GRUNKLESTAN

Rolling on the ground and LAUGHING.

STANThe lamby dance? Kid, that’s rich.

Your parents must hate you!Dipper frowns into the camera. STATIC --

EXT. SYRUPING STARTING LINE - MOMENTS LATER

-- Video resumes on the mayor SQUIRTING a starting line ofsyrup in the grass. Mabel fixes a basket onto Waddles andpaints his face with camouflage.

13.



Mabel turns around, revealing her face is covered in pink andyellow camo as well as a WWII army helmet.

MABEL(to camera)

Ready for your close-up Mr. Pines?

DIPPERNah, I’m good.

Mabel gets aggressive.

MABELYou need it! We need to win! Win, win, win!

DIPPERMabel, I don’t --

Stan approaches with a helmet camera.

STANHere, strap this on the pig.There’s no way I don’t want footageto rub in the faces of the losers.

Mabel straps on the helmet and Stan gets to their table.

DIPPER(to the camera)

Okay, here we go. We’re goingpretty deep in the woods, so I

shouldn’t have a problem findingSasquatch. I’m hoping --

MABELDipper! No Sasquatch! Get yourpig in the game! PIIIIGGGG!!!

Mabel smashes Waddles’ face into the camera. STATIC --

JUMP CUT TO:

SECONDS LATERMabel looks angry at the camera.

DIPPER--usually just joking around. Whyare you acting so serious today?

MABELWhy? Look at her!

14.



Dipper pans to Pacifica Northwest. Behind her, we see herDad shaking hands with a dark figure in a trench coat.

Pacifica points to Mabel and swings around an LED messagestick.

(NOTE: This is a device with a bunch of lights that when youswing it around, a message is illuminated. They sell them atDisneyland. Future marketing built into a script? Oh yes.)

The message reads “You’re going down Mabel. Disrespectfullyyours, The Northwest Family. P.S. Your pig stinks.”

MAYOR HIRSCHSee? She’s been torturing me allsummer! She’s gotta know defeat.

Mayor Hirsch stands next to a giant clock and pulls out anacorn looking gun.

MAYOR HIRSCH (CONT’D)(to himself)

These guns look more and moreridiculous for S & P every --

(noticing the camera)Uhh, gatherer’s take your mark!Get set! Go nuts!

(the gun doesn’t fire)Seriously?

He looks at the gun. The acorn POPS out and BOPS him in theface. He passes out onto the clock, starting the timer.

Everyone runs into the woods! Mabel gets on top of Waddlesas Dipper chases after them.

MABELWahoo! Ride em pig! To the GreatWhite Oak, Waddles!

DIPPERMabel! I can’t keep up!

MABEL

Grab onto the tail! The tail!Dipper lunges and grabs onto Waddles’ tail. The camerabounces around like crazy as Dipper gets dragged.

DIPPERArrrghhh! I cann’tttt hoolllddddoonnn!!!

15.



Dipper let’s go and is sent tumbling down a hill! Lookingstraight ahead, Dipper sees the edge.

DIPPER (CONT’D)Is that a cliff? IS THAT A CLIFF?

Dipper YELLS as he goes flying over the cliff, but SUDDENLYSTOPS! The camera, focusing on Dipper looking down into thedeep valley below.

DIPPER (CONT’D)Phew. Good thing this camera strapis strong enough to hold a 12 yearold boy.

RIIIIIPPPPP. The camera pans around to reveal the strap iscaught on a root jetting out of the cliff. Dipper ZOOMS INon the strap seeing a warning: “Strong enough to hold an 11year old boy.”

The strap slowly tears....and then finally SNAPS!

DIPPER (CONT’D)Ahhh! I was off by one yeeearrrr!

As Dipper and the camera plunge to the earth, a giant FISHINGNET shoots out from the cliff, revealing a HAIRY ARM. AsDipper and the camera land in the net --

STATIC!

END OF ACT ONE

16.



ACT TWO

STATIC...THEN,

EXT. WOODS - SAME TIME

In the corner of the screen reads “PIG CAM!” Waddles turnsaround to see Dipper letting go of his tail and tumblingtowards the cliff.

MABEL (O.S.)Eyes on road Waddles!

The camera looks up at Mabel.

MABEL (CONT’D)He’ll come back. Dipper’s justbeing a big grump. Look at that!

Waddles looks straight ahead revealing --

THE GREAT WHITE OAK! The biggest tree in all of GravityFalls. It’s a magnificent sight and the acorns surroundingits roots are the size of softballs.

Mabel hops off of Waddles and looks up in awe at the tree.

MABEL (CONT’D)Whoa. What a beautiful tree! Thisis where I’ll build mydreamtreehousefortnailsalon

someday...but for now, BRAIN BUSTERATTACK!!

Mabel (wearing her helmet so she isn’t injured) grabs as muchof the trunk as she can and SLAMS her head repeatedly intothe tree.

A RUMBLING shakes the PIG CAM. Waddles looks up as acornsrain down!

MABEL (CONT’D)Run back and forth Waddles! Catch

those acorns! This is the perfectsmartphone game if ever there wasone!

Waddles runs back and forth catching acorns. Looking up, onecomes RIGHT INTO THE CAMERA -- STATIC --

CUT TO:

17.



DARKNESS

DIPPER (V.O.)Ohhh...What...? I can’t seeanything. I think I have a nightvision mode on here...

SNAP!

INT. SASQUATCH’S CAVE - SAME TIME

Dipper looks into the lens, not seeing a BLURRY SASQUATCHbehind him! He spins around and YELPS, dropping the camera.Sasquatch also YELPS!

On the ground, the camera zips from FOCUSED to UNFOCUSED.

(NOTE: Most of the time, the camera focuses on Sasquatch, it

is blurry and unfocused. A convenient malfunction covering what Sasquatch’s face actually looks like.)

SASQUATCHWhoa, whoa, hey let’s stopscreaming! Let me get the light.

The lights turn on in the room as Dipper picks up the cameraand shuts off night vision. Dipper points the camera at aBLURRY, FUZZY CREATURE. It’s SASQUATCH.

DIPPERYou can...you can --

SASQUATCHTalk? Really? Are there any morequestions that are more cliche thanstarting off with that one? Howabout a simple ‘hello’ or ‘boy it’shot in this cave.’ Speaking of which.

Sasquatch flips on the AC. It WHIRLS to life and after asecond, shuts off.

SASQUATCH (CONT’D)Huh. Is it the acorn fest already?

DIPPERYeah. How’d you know?

SASQUATCHUhhh, no reason. I’m Henry.

18.



DIPPERHenry the Sasquatch?

SASQUATCHMy parents had a sense of humor Iguess. Anyway, kid, what are you

doing out here?

DIPPERI’m looking for you!

SASQUATCHWell, you found me. Now what?

BEAT.

DIPPERWell, now I take a picture of youand show a girl and...yeah.

SASQUATCHGood luck with that kid. Camerastend to never work around me.Trust me, I’ve been trying.

Henry leads Dipper into --

A FAMILY ROOM

-- That is neat and clean. Wouldn’t expect this from a mythical beast. Henry hands Dipper a stack of photos.

SASQUATCHHere, take a look.

As Dipper looks through the photos, the images are CLEAR, butare just shots of a hairy arm, a leg, a blurry self shot, thelips of a duckface, etc.

DIPPERHmmm. Strange. Maybe you haven’tbeen using the right camera?

SASQUATCHI don’t know about that kid. Everyother shot I take turns out better.

PANNING across the room, Dipper is met with GORGEOUS photosof Gravity Falls:

-The sun setting on the Mystery Shack.-The Corduroy family wrestling in the park.

19.



-The Northwest family arguing with the Sheriff over a parkingticket.-Edward the merman leaping over Mabel’s outstretched hand.

Each photo has an artsy/paparazzi feel to them. Not yourtypical instagram or facebook photo.

DIPPERThese are amazing!

SASQUATCHHeh. Thanks. I’ve lovedphotography ever since I was alittle quatch. Only thing I’venever been able to capture? Me.

Dipper sets the camera down and steps into frame.

DIPPER

Wow that’s...depressing. If you want to be seen so bad, why notjust walk around in public?

SASQUATCHYou don’t think I’ve tried that?That was the worst Summerween ever.Ehh, I don’t want to bore you with my stuff. I’m sure you don’t know what it’s like to not feel noticed.

Dipper looks to a portrait of Wendy and Robbie holding handsin the park. Dipper is in the background, staring sadly.

DIPPERMore than you might think. Don’t worry Henry. I’ll show the world who you are!

SASQUATCHYou mean it? How would you dothat?

DIPPEROh I’d find a way. Trust me.

SASQUATCHHeh, you’re alright kid. Here,have a free postcard.

Henry offers Dipper a postcard of Robbie and Wendy.

DIPPERYeah, I’ll pass on that.

20.



A KNOCKING startles Henry.

DIPPER (CONT’D)You expecting guests?

SASQUATCH

It’s my big bro! You gotta hide!

Henry hustles Dipper under a couch. The camera nowcompletely in focus shows Henry’s hairy feet running to thedoor.

SASQUATCH (CONT’D)Oh man, I’m up Dipper’s creek without a paddle!

DIPPERREALLY?!

STATIC --

EXT. SYRUPING STARTING LINE - SAME TIME

PIG CAM! Mabel LAUGHS as the two ride towards Grunkle Stan.

MABELI can almost taste the tears of theNorthwest family.

(impersonating Pacifica)Look at me! I’m Pacifica and thetears of my failures have made the

syrup taste salty! WAAAHHH!

The two arrive at Grunkle Stan and his crazy syrup machine.

MAYOR HIRSCH (O.S.)(over loudspeaker)

Thirty more minutes to go!

STANNicely done Mabel. We just needanother basket full and you’regoing to get such a half dollar

store set of stickers.MABEL

Half dollar store! Half dollarstore!

STANAlright, let’s get this thing warmed up.

21.



The two load up the giant acorns into the machine. Stanflips a switch. Nothing happens.

MABELWow! It’s quiet too!

STANThat’s weird.

Stan SMACKS the machine. It CHOKES and shuts off. Stanrhythmically SLAPS it.

MABELWhat are you, some kind of drummer?I’ve got the beat.

Mabel hits the machine like a tom.

It’s here we notice that they’re starting to get farther and

farther away from the camera...

STANMaybe it’s jammed? Maybe theacorns are too big!

Waddles OINKS and turns around to see PACIFICA dragging him.

PACIFICA You’re coming with me pig.

Waddles OINKS in terror to Mabel who is just a speck in thecamera.

MABEL (O.S.)I’ll be there in a second Waddles!

Waddles looks back at Pacifica, who puts a bag over his head.

STATIC --

INT. SASQUATCH’S CAVE - FRONT ROOM - SAME TIME

From under the couch, Dipper points the camera on himself.

DIPPER(whispers)

Okay so, I have now seen aSasquatch. His brother is about tocome inside. I...am so...EXCITED.Wendy, if you’re watching this...Ithink I’m in love with you.

22.

(MORE)



I often daydream of what our future will look like and I hope you feelthe same way...Phew, that felt goodto say out loud. Note to futureDipper, edit that partout...and....go...Okay so, I have

now seen a Sasqatch --

BIG BRO SASQUATCHYo! Little bro!

Dipper points the camera at the hairy feet, joined by anotherset of hairier feet.

SASQUATCHHey big brother. Did you see me inthe newspaper today?

BIG BRO SASQUATCH

What? That wasn’t you! It was tooblurry for anyone to know. Youready for the acorn festival?

SASQUATCHListen, I don’t think we should go.The humans aren’t so bad ya know?Do we have to ruin that old guy’sday again?

BIG BRO SASQUATCHWhat kind of question is that? Ofcourse we do! It’s what we get

paid for.

SASQUATCHBro, listen, I’ve been thinking --

BIG BRO SASQUATCHWhoa, thinking? Don’t think!Look, you and I are going to havefamily fun time, okay? And the way we have fun is paying for the AC.Don’t make me wait and put thisthing on.

Big Bro Sasquatch leaves. Dipper comes out from under thecouch. Henry holds a trench coat.

DIPPERWhat did he mean by destroy thatold guy’s machine?

SASQUATCHUhhh...

23.

DIPPER (CONT'D)



STATIC --

BLACK - PIG CAM

A panicked OINKING and heavy SNORTING. Somehow the cameraspins around to see Waddles OINKING in fear.

WADDLES(subtitled)

Oinkay, I’ve been pignapped. Idon’t know where I’m going. I am so...scared. Mabel! Boy Mabel!Old man! Fat other guy!

PACIFICA (O.S.)QUIET YOU!

Waddles tumbles into the backseat of --

THE NORTHWEST’S CAR

PACIFICA (CONT’D)Alright little piggy, you’ll justhave to wait here until thisfestival is over.

Waddles OINKS.

PACIFICA (CONT’D)Why you oink? Because we’ve been winning this festival for years andI’m not about to let you Pines win.

She shuts the door to the family car. Then, she reopens it,rolls the window down part way and shuts the door again.CLICK goes the lock.

Waddles goes to the window watching Pacifica LAUGH as sheleaves. Mabel and Grunkle Stan enter, calling out toWaddles.

STANPig! Pig! Where are you pig!?

MABELHe’s gotta be close. I can smellhim!

STANWhat does he smell like, pork chopsand mud?

24.



MABELNo! He smells like undying loveand affection. Here Waddles!

Waddles OINKS, but they can’t hear him as they disappear overa hill. Waddles sadly sits down and OINK SIGHS.

STATIC --

INT. SASQUATCH’S CAVE - FRONT ROOM - SAME TIME

Dipper sets the camera down. He approaches Henry’s hairybody, but still no face is seen.

DIPPER-- sounded a lot like sabotage!

SASQUATCH

Uhh, no? Maybe. Ugh. Look kid,this place doesn’t pay for itself.Do you have any idea how much airconditioning costs? It’s hot here!

DIPPERI thought you were just some misunderstood creature, but you’reactually just a...monster!

SASQUATCHI don’t get a choice here, okay?

DIPPERWhat? You always have a choice!There are tons of ways to make money rather than sabotage an old man’s hopes and dreams...even ifthose dreams are really greedy.

SASQUATCHLook, he’s my brother and we’refamily. What kind of family member would I be if I just left him alone?

DIPPER....Umm...not a great...family member? Look, if you’re going todo this, I gotta go warn them.

Dipper goes to the door. Henry stops him.

25.



SASQUATCHSorry kid. I can’t have yousabotaging ussabatoures...sabatagers?Sabatageragerings?

DIPPERSaboteurs.

SASQUATCHRight. Sorry about this.

Sasquatch grabs Dipper, who manages to grab the camera strapand gets thrown into --

THE DARK ROOM

-- Where the door is SLAMMED shut and locked. Dipper poundson the door.

DIPPERHey! Let me out! LET ME OUT!

STATIC

END OF ACT TWO

26.



ACT THREE

INT. NORTHWEST CAR - SAME TIME

Waddles SLAMS his helmet cam into the car door.

WHAM - STATIC - WHAM - STATIC - WHAM! Waddles GRUNTS, tired.He falls on the seat cushion.

MAYOR HIRSCH (O.S.)Fifteen minutes! Get your syrupsready!!

CH-CHUCK. CH-CHUCK. The front doors of the car open.Waddles looks down the middle to see --

-- THE SASQUATCH BROTHERS wearing trench coats. The image isclear, but their faces shaded by their hats.

BIG BRO SASQUATCHHey, why are you looking so down?

SASQUATCHI dunno. I was hoping maybe wedon’t have to do this? I mean, Ithink my photos are good enough to make an honest living. Don’t yathink?

BIG BRO SASQUATCHHaha, what? Bro, how are we going

to sell your photos from the caveand get paid? Use your head.

SASQUATCHI guess you’re right...

BIG BRO SASQUATCHLook, once this job is done, we canjet and take these ridiculous getups off. Got it?

SASQUATCH

Hey...do you smell, undying loveand affection?

They turn as Waddles LEAPS INTO ACTION! On their SCREAMS --

STATIC!

27.



INT. SASQUATCH’S CAVE - DARK ROOM - SAME TIME

Dipper puts the night vision back on the camera.

DIPPERWell, here I am again. Currently

trapped in a dark room whileSasquatches destroy Grunkle Stan’s machine. And I still don’t haveany good footage of the brothers!

He sadly takes off his hat and looks right into the lens.

DIPPER (CONT’D)I really let everyone down today.Especially Mabel and Stan. Theyjust wanted family fun time andI...was pretty selfish. Man, howam I going to get out of here?

Dipper rubs his hand into his hair...and stops. Something’sdifferent. He pulls his hand back to reveal...

...A HAIRPIN!

DIPPER (CONT’D)Mabel! You crazy girl! You’resmarter than you give yourselfcredit for.

Dipper takes the pin and uses it on the lock.

DIPPER (CONT’D)Okay let’s see here...Just a couple more...clicks...

CLICK CLICK! The door swings open.

DIPPER (CONT’D)Alright! I’m coming guys!!

He dashes around the corner.

Beat.....Beat....

He runs back into the closet and grab the camera.

DIPPER (CONT’D)Yeah. Definitely still need this.

He runs out of the dark room to --

STATIC!

28.



INT. NORTHWEST CAR - SAME TIME

Waddles fights the two Sasquatch brothers by kicking hoovesinto faces.

BIG BRO SASQUATCH

Hey! What the heck is that thing!

SASQUATCHGahhh!

Waddles takes control of the wheel and drives the car throughthe picnic tables, SMASHING machines from various people.

BIG BRO SASQUATCHGet off of me you crazy thing!

Waddles BITES down on the hairy arm.

Waddles looks dead ahead to see the Northwest family makingsyrups with their machines.

Pacifica looks to the driver.

PACIFICA ...Shoot.

Waddles whips the car towards them, pushes the window buttondown and --

JUMPS out the window.

Waddles watches as the car SMASHES through the iSyrup machine. An explosion of syrup covers the family.

The Sasquatch brothers jump out of the car.

Pacifica STOMPS up to the brothers.

PACIFICA (CONT’D)You idiots! You were supposed todestroy the Pines machine, notours!

BIG BRO SASQUATCH(to Sasquatch)We better get outta here.

Pacifica chases after Big Bro Sasquatch, as Henry runs off inanother direction.

MABELWaddles!

29.



Waddles looks to Mabel and Stan.

MABEL (CONT’D)There you are my little trufflesnuffle!

STANGreat, we got the pig. Now tofinish --

MAYOR HIRSCH (O.S.)Five minute warning! Perfectlyplot pointed five minute warning!

MABELWhat?! That’s not enough time!

STANAnd my machine’s broken. Guess

this isn’t my time of the year.

DIPPER (O.S.)Wait!!

Mabel, Waddles and Stan turn to see --

DIPPER

-- running at them carrying an arm full of huge acorns andthe camera around his neck.

MABEL

Dipper!

DIPPERSorry I got so sidetracked guys.Ready to win this thing?

STANIt’s too late for us kid.

Stan shows Dipper the broken machine.

STAN (CONT’D)

Without the grinder working, theacorns won’t get crushed so...nosyrup.

DIPPERThere’s gotta be some way.

Dipper looks right at Waddles.

30.



DIPPER (CONT’D)I think I’ve got an idea.

STATIC!

Dipper and Waddles stand on top of the machine. Mabel looks

into the camera and wipes the screen, stopping the brokenfocusing problem.

MABELThat must’ve been annoying.

DIPPEROkay Waddles. Just do what Mabelsaid early. Smash and mash!

Waddles OINKS in agreement and proceeds to SMASH the acorns,like grapes in a wine maker.

As the machine SHAKES, Stan sticks a squirrel shaped bottlenear the spout.

MAYOR HIRSCH (O.S.)Ten...nine...eight...

STANCome on kid!

MABELYou can do it!!

MAYOR HIRSCH (O.S.)

Seven...six...five...

Stan turns the spout. Nothing. Dipper and Waddles STOMPFASTER!

STANCome on...come on...

MAYOR HIRSCH (O.S.)Four...three...two...one!

The tiniest DROP of syrup comes out of the spout and SLAPS

the bottom of the bottle.MAYOR HIRSCH (O.S.) (CONT’D)

Time! Shut your machines off andpresent your bottles to the judgingtable!

Stan picks up the bottle.

31.



STANHuh. Well, at least it’ssomething.

STATIC!

EXT. MAIN STAGE - LATER

Mabel passes the camera to Dipper who PANS across the variousjars of syrup. Mayor Hirsch puts in a teeny tiny spoon toeach jar and samples the syrups before moving on.

Dipper looks to Mabel who cleans up Waddles’ syrupy hooves.

STANGotta hand it to you kid, youreally came through in the end.Kind of thought you weren’t coming

back.

DIPPERYeah well, I couldn’t miss familyfun time. I don’t know what couldbe more important.

Mabel smiles at this, Waddles nods.

MAYOR HIRSCH (O.S.)My goodness! What is this?

Dipper whips the camera to the stage. Mayor Hirsch squeezes

the tiniest droplet of syrup from the squirrel bottle.

MAYOR HIRSCH (CONT’D)This may be the best syrup I’veever had! Who made this?

MABELWe did! We did!

MAYOR HIRSCHIt’s as if the smallest amount ofthis syrup transformed the very

fabric of my imagination. One droptruly was enough.

STANReally? I mean, yes, really.

MAYOR HIRSCHI think we’ve found the blue ribbon winner!

32.



People CHEER as Stan hops up on stage.

STANYes! Finally! In your face!!

People run to the stage with fists of cash.

TOURIST 1Where can I buy just a drop?

TOURIST 2I’ll pay any price for a taste!

While this goes on, Dipper looks back at the woods, and seesHenry watching from behind a tree. Dipper goes to him.

SASQUATCHHey kid.

DIPPERHey Henry.

SASQUATCHListen, I’m sorry about tossing youin the dark room. That wasn’t agood way to treat a guest.

DIPPERI’ll say.

SASQUATCHGuess you guys won after all.

That’s good. Looks like it’s goingto be a hot summer.

DIPPERMaybe. Or maybe I have anotheridea.

STATIC!

EXT. MAIN STAGE - MOMENTS LATER

Dipper introduces the trenchcoated Henry to Toby. Toby looksat a scrap book full of awesome photos.

TOBYThese are great! We’ve beenneeding another photographer sinceour last one ran away or was putaway. One of those. You want ajob?

33.



SASQUATCHDo I? Aww man. That would beawesome! You’ve got a deal.

Henry and Toby shake hands. Toby looks at the hairy hand.

TOBYYou’ve got hair all over yourknuckles? Just like me!

Mabel ENTERS.

MABELHey Dipper, ready for a familyphoto?

DIPPERI think so. I’m looking forward toediting all this stuff for Mom and

Dad...andpossiblyWendywhoknowsdidIsaythat?

TOBY(to Henry)

Ready for your first assignment?

STATIC!

EXT. PINES TABLE - MOMENTS LATER

The camera focuses on the family. Dipper steps in front to

make sure it’s set.

DIPPEROkay...perfect.

Dipper runs to the family and poses next to the machine.

DIPPER (CONT’D)Hey Henry, why not set the timerand jump in?

SASQUATCH

You think that’s a good idea?DIPPER

Sure!

SASQUATCHOkay...here we go.

Henry runs behind Dipper.

34.



MABELEverybody say ‘Take that Pacifica!’

FLASH!

INSERT: The photo shows the Pine family, Dipper with his eyes

closed, Mabel mouthwide open, Stan looking confused and...

HENRY. His face perfectly clear and yet fuzzy as a teddybear in the photo. Smiling.

END OF ACT THREE

35.



TAG

INT. THE MYSTERY HACK - NEXT DAY - DREAM SEQUENCE

Dipper shows Wendy the Gravity Falls Gossiper.

DIPPERSee? That’s Henry the Sasquatchright on the cover.

WENDYWow Dipper. That was amazing. Yousure are one popular guy.

ROBBIE enters.

ROBBIEHey Wendy, you want to go the

arcade?

WENDYHeck no! I’m done with you Robbie.I’m Dipper’s girl now.

Wendy plants a kiss on Dipper’s cheek. Dipper melts.

SOOS (V.O.)Dipper? Yo, Dipper!

END DREAM SEQ.

INT. THE MYSTERY HACK - NEXT DAY

Dipper snaps out of his daydream.

SOOSYou wanted to show us something?

Dipper shows Wendy and Soos the Gossiper.

WENDYDude! Look at your face!

DIPPERWhat? Not me, Sasquatch!

SOOSHa! Mabel’s catching flies with a mouth that big.

36.



WENDYAnd look at Stan! You guys areridiculous.

Dipper SIGHS, but before we FADE OUT --

20-8-1-14-11-19 6-15-18 18-5-1-4-9-14-7!

END OF EPISODE

37.

Gravity Falls Episode 15.5

Documents

Gravity Falls Episode 15.5