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Page 1: Body Language

Corporate Class Inc.44 Charles Street WestSuite 4711Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221Fax 416-967-2818

General [email protected]

Web Sitewww.corporateclassinc.com Copyright © 2003 - 2007 Corporate Class Inc. - All Rights ReservedCopyright © 2003 - 2007 Corporate Class Inc. - All Rights Reserved

BODY LANGUAGE

BODY LANGUAGE

Page 2: Body Language

Corporate Class Inc.44 Charles Street WestSuite 4711Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221Fax 416-967-2818

General [email protected]

Web Sitewww.corporateclassinc.com Copyright © 2003 - 2007 Corporate Class Inc. - All Rights ReservedCopyright © 2003 - 2007 Corporate Class Inc. - All Rights Reserved

BODY LANGUAGE

BODY LANGUAGE

Page 3: Body Language
Page 4: Body Language

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette 1

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

CORPORATE CLASS INC. NORTH AMERICAN BUSINESS ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

Copyright © 2003-2007, Corporate Class Inc. - All Rights Reserved Corporate Class Inc. owns all rights to these materials. Corporate Class Inc. is licensing these materials for use by one individual only, whether for private use or in connection with any training course in which these materials are provided. No part of this publication, nor any materials used in this training session may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form by any process – electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise. No rights to reproduce, transfer, assign or create, in whole or in part, derivative works based on these materials are granted without the express written consent of Corporate Class Inc.

Page 5: Body Language
Page 6: Body Language

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette 3

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

CORPORATE CLASS INC. NORTH AMERICAN BUSINESS ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

TABLE OF CONTENTS

WORKSHOP INTRODUCTIONAbout Corporate Class Inc. Diane CraigPoised for Success: The Starting PointSetting My Goals

INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTEOverviewInterpersonal Communication Etiquette TestBody Language Eye ContactThe Handshake

579

10

1115172730

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Page 8: Body Language

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette 5

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

CORPORATE CLASS INC. NORTH AMERICAN BUSINESS ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

About Corporate Calss Inc.

Corporate Class Inc. provides training solutions, advice and consultation in

contemporary business etiquette, international protocol, social etiquette, dining

etiquette, and dress and decorum. Our mission is to give the knowledge and

tools needed to present a polished, professional image – an image that conveys

intelligence and poise and that inspires confidence in your clients and within

your company.

With offices in Toronto and Ottawa, Corporate Class Inc. has been helping

organizations and individuals succeed since 1981. We have worked one-on-

one with executives, politicians, sales professionals, and recent university

graduates. We have delivered workshops to organizations such as Bell Canada,

Canada Post Corporation and Queen’s University School of Business, to name

a few of our clients. Whether you are looking to enhance your personal and

professional image, or sharpen your company’s competitive edge, Corporate

Class Inc. can help you achieve your goals.

Page 9: Body Language
Page 10: Body Language

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette 7

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

CORPORATE CLASS INC. NORTH AMERICAN BUSINESS ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

Diane Craig

Ms. Craig has dedicated her career to the development and enhancement

of the professional image of individuals and organizations. She is a graduate

of the Protocol School of Washington, and holds a Certificate in Intercultural

Studies from the University of British Columbia. Ms. Craig provides the

most expert training and consultation available in national and international

business protocol.

Ms. Craig is an alumna of L’Académie des Hauts Couturiers Canadiens, and

was an instructor at the Richard Robinson School of Fashion Design in Ottawa.

Her extensive training in fashion, combined with several years of experience

working with professionals and politicians, has earned her a top spot as an

image consultant.

Her views are often quoted in the daily press such as The Globe and Mail and

The National Post. Ms. Craig has appeared on programs such as The National

on CBC and Canada AM on CTV. In 2004 Ms. Craig received the Meritorious

Service Medal from the Governor General of Canada, Her Excellency Adrienne

Clarkson for her volunteer work.

Page 11: Body Language
Page 12: Body Language

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette 9

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

CORPORATE CLASS INC. NORTH AMERICAN BUSINESS ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

Poised for Success: The Starting Point

Hello and welcome to the Corporate Class Inc. North American Business

Etiquette workshop. We are here today to unravel the mysteries of protocol

and etiquette, and to demystify the intricacies of human interaction. In the

process, we will be building and enhancing skills that will help you strengthen

your business relationships and improve your personal and professional image.

Represent your company with poise and class.

In today’s competitive environment, image and style are often the deciding

factors that can make or break a deal. While we will never really know how

many opportunities have been missed because of an unintended lapse in

manners, we do know that, in order to survive and succeed in these fast and

often turbulent times, we must stand apart from the competition. Depending

on the nature of your business and the market in which you operate, this

could mean offering better products and services, or lower prices, or both.

But regardless of the type of business and industry you are in, there is one

sure way to sharpen your competitive edge: Outclass your competition by

presenting a credible, trustworthy image – the kind with whom you would

want to do business.

Page 13: Body Language

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette 10

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

CORPORATE CLASS INC. NORTH AMERICAN BUSINESS ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

SETTING MY GOALS

What do I want to achieve by participating in this workshop?

(Please write down the 5 key objectives you wish to accomplish and why

they’re important to you.)

How will I know when I’ve achieved my objectives? (Please be specific.)

What etiquette or protocol questions do I wish to have answered?

Page 14: Body Language

11

INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

A well-known author who won a prestigious British award for her first collection of short stories recalls a private audience she had with the Queen of England. “What struck me most,” says the author, “was that I knew the very moment the meeting was finished, even though the Queen never really said anything to that effect. But her body language, and the subtle change in her tone of voice, told me it was time for me to stand up and take my leave.”

The Quintessential Differentiator

A number of things come into play when we communicate with each

other: the words we say, our tone and cadence of speech, our stance and

unconscious body movements, and our deliberate actions. In business,

how effectively you convey your message and image, and how astutely

you interpret and respond to other people’s signals, can spell the difference

between a failed or successful negotiation, a stalled career or a promotion, and

a disgruntled or satisfied customer. This is where communication etiquette

comes in.

Effective communication etiquette is, essentially, a code of civil behaviour

based on respect, understanding, consideration and logic. It is about putting

your best foot forward each time and conducting yourself in a way that tells

people you have the intelligence and generosity of nature to recognize their

needs. It is about class, that quintessential differentiator.

Page 15: Body Language

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INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

OVERVIEW

The purpose of this section is to help you develop skills to:

Read other people’s body language and control our own;

Use eye contact to build rapport and convey self-assurance;

Execute the perfect handshake;

Communication etiquette is a subtle art, but its impact is significant and the

impression it leaves is long-lasting – though perhaps not as enduring as the

impression left behind by a careless faux pas or, worse, an inconsiderate act

or unacceptable behaviour. Good communication etiquette is essential in every

aspect of our lives, but none more so than in business. Integrating this subtle art

skillfully into your business practices requires little money and effort; failing to do

so could cost you dearly.

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13

INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

SETTING MY GOALS

What communication habits or skills would I like to change, improve or

develop to ensure I appear respectful and considerate at all times?

What communication etiquette questions would I like to have answered?

Take the communication etiquette test!

Page 17: Body Language

14

INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

Do you act as you must, or as you feel? As professionals, our actions must be

guided by protocol and etiquette, and not by our whims and impulses.

What guides your actions? Do you have the knowledge and skills required

to manoeuvre through the minefields of a negotiation, or over the awkward

bumps that could potentially derail a social gathering? Test your knowledge of

communication etiquette by answering the multiple-choice questions on the

following page.

Page 18: Body Language

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INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

1. You are at a party where a new acquaintance is taking you around and introducing you to all the guests. Your name is Anya and she is telling everyone to say ‘hello’ to Anna. What should you do?

a) To avoid embarrassing your gracious and well-meaning new friend, wait until all introductions are complete and then correct her after.b) Inform her immediately of her unintended error.c) Your friend will be embarrassed whether you correct her now or later, so you will just let it pass.d) When your friend is out of earshot, tell the other guests what your real name is.

2. You are in the middle of a meeting with an important client, Ms. Baker, when the president of your company, Mr. Chen, walks in. The two have never met, so you:

a) Rise from your chair and say, “Mr. Chen, I’d like to introduce Ms. Baker, one of the buyers at Great Foods.”b) Defer to Mr. Chen’s authority and allow him to take the lead in introducing himself to Ms. Baker.c) Rise from your chair and say, “Ms. Baker, I’d like to introduce Mr. Chen, our president.”d) Mr. Chen is interrupting your meeting. To avoid wasting Ms. Baker’s time, you nod briefly at him and continue with your meeting.

3. You meet a new client for the first time in their office. To build rapport and increase the effectiveness of your meeting, you:

a) Give the client some details of your upcoming weekend with your family in the hopes that the client will find it interesting. b) Remain silent to impress upon the client your ability to listen attentively until the client asks you a question. c) Keenly observe the client’s mannerisms and copy those behaviours in order to make the client think that you are both similar. d) Glance around the client’s office before you are seated and then immediately ask a question about one of the items you see that you find interesting in order to get the client talking.

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INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

4. You are at your company’s holiday party and one of your colleagues has just made an offensive joke. To diffuse the tension, you:

a) Laugh at the joke to spare your colleague embarrassment. But you intend to talk to him about it in private the next day.b) Reprimand your colleague in a light and joking manner. This puts everyone at ease while letting your colleague know his joke was inappropriate.c) Change the subject immediately.d) Tell a joke of your own to counter the negative effects of your colleague’s joke.

5. You are seated at your desk when a group of visitors walks in. To welcome them, you:

a) Rise, move to the front of your desk and initiate a handshake with the leader of the group. Then allow the leader to make the introductions. b) Rise to welcome them and offer them seats right away. Once they are all seated, approach each one, initiate a handshake and exchange introductions or salutations.c) Rise, move to the front of your desk and initiate handshakes with everyone.d) Rise and defer introductions to the leader of the group.

Did you act as you must, or as you feel?

Page 20: Body Language

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INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE BODY LANGUAGE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

“Frequently the human animal is unaware of his actions – which makes them all the more revealing.” -- Desmond Morris,Manwatching

Deciphering Our Silent Signals

It is the silent monologue you deliver during most of your waking hours, a

string of unspoken messages that either support or deny your words, or that

hint at your feelings when you are silent. It is body language, defined by Oxford

Dictionary as “the process of communication using conscious or unconscious

gestures or expressions.”

Using body language to enhance your communication and interpersonal skills

requires the ability to read other people’s signals while learning to control your

own. Master these skills and you will make a quantum leap in human interaction.

Apply them in business and you will find yourself on a fast track to success.

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BODY LANGUAGEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

Did you know...

The average attention span is one to three seconds?When speaking English, we utter between 125 and 140 words per minute? When conversing in French or Italian, we speak between 145 and 170 words per minute.We hear an average of 650 words per minute.

We see what we want to see.1

If we know what to look for, we can see what we need to see.

1 Source of image: W.E. Hill, published in Puck, November 6, 1915; appeared in Edwin G. Boring, “A New Ambiguous Figure,” American Journal of Psychology, July, 1930, p.444

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BODY LANGUAGEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

The Seven C’s of Body Language

1. Consciousness

We are all experts at body language; we just choose to ignore it most of

the time! We must learn to use our ears, eyes, nose, and hands to get the

real sense of what is being said. To communicate effectively, we need to

pay attention to our own body language. At the same time, we have to be

conscious of the body language of others in order to respond appropriately to

what is being said non-verbally as well as verbally.

2. Clusters

We cannot read a person’s body language by looking at only one gesture. That

would be similar to interpreting the meaning of an entire paragraph based on a

single word. In body language, we create and take away impressions through

a complex collage of gestures and words where one gesture is equal to one

word in a sentence. To get the whole sentence, we must look at the cluster of

gestures.

3. Congruence

Congruence means harmony. In body language, congruence means the body

is saying exactly the same thing as the words. For example, a friend whom

you have not seen for a while is saying, “It’s been so nice seeing you again,

we really must make arrangements to get together more often.” At the same

time, her body language is open and positive – she is smiling, nodding her

head, making comfortable eye contact and gesturing invitingly with her hand.

She is displaying congruency, an indication that she is sincere. If, on the other

hand, negative body language – a hard-set jaw, immobile head, fidgety hands

and avoidance of eye contact – accompanies the words, then you would have

to wonder about the sincerity of your friend’s statement.

Page 23: Body Language

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BODY LANGUAGEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

Are you getting mixed signals?

When you notice a person’s body language is incongruent with his or her words, focus on it and become aware of it.

Ask yourself if this is an intended gesture in response to the message you are communicating or simply a habit or mannerism.

Check it out by asking:

“Is everything all right?”

“You seem a little unsure?”

“Have I said something you aren’t clear about?”

“You look distracted, is there something wrong?”

“I’m not sure I’ve made myself clear. Would you like me to clarify what I’ve said?”

These should be subtle enough to give the other person an opportunity

to bring the non-verbal messages out into the open and express their

true feelings.

Page 24: Body Language

21

BODY LANGUAGEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

4. Changes

Be alert to changes in a person’s body language; these changes sometimes

belie the words that accompany them. Desmond Morris, the renowned

zoologist and anthropologist, refers to these contradicting signals as “non-

verbal leakage.” In most people, this non-verbal leakage occurs in the legs and

feet, an area of the body we are least aware of and, therefore, least able to

control. The movement of our hands and arms, and the posture of our torso are

also potential leak sources. Our face – the part of our body whose actions we

are most aware of – is the easiest part to discipline. Therefore, when reading

a person’s signals, do not limit your observations to the face. Pay attention to

the area below the shoulders, and watch for changes in this area as the person

speaks.

Face

Hands

Feet

Page 25: Body Language

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BODY LANGUAGEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

5. Concentrate

Building Rapport by Mirroring, Pacing and Leading

Using your understanding of non-verbal communication, you can build rapport

and increase the effectiveness of your presentations by employing the following:

Mirroring

Good friends or spouses often

display the same postures or

gestures when conversing.

Their heads may be tilted at

the same angle, mirror each

other’s facial expressions, or

lean toward each other in a

symmetrical fashion. They may

be so harmonized with each

other that even their eye contact is synchronized. To establish a similar kind of

harmony with your clients and colleagues, mirror their posture, head tilt, hand

movements. By “speaking” in a non-verbal language to which they can relate,

you are putting them at ease and increasing their receptiveness to you.

Page 26: Body Language

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BODY LANGUAGEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

Pacing

This refers to how tightly your mirrored gestures follow those of your listener.

Clearly, in the first five minutes of a conversation, you can mirror very few

gestures and this is preferable to maintain the desired subtlety. However,

after 15 minutes, as you begin to pick up the syntax of a person’s non-verbal

language, your mirroring can follow more closely. A caveat: If you betray even

a hint of mimicking the speaker’s gestures, you will have lost much more than

what successful mirroring could ever bring you.

Leading

When it is your turn to speak, or pitch a new product, it is often useful to

continue to use the borrowed gestures to elicit, in your listener, the responses

you want. If leaning forward with outstretched hands was his or her way of

expressing a dilemma, do the same. This can lead the person to perhaps better

understand the problem you are trying to resolve. And, when you present your

solution to the problem, express the positive points with the same non-verbal

intensity you witnessed before, perhaps moving forward on the seat of your

chair, allowing a half smile, and gesticulating with two beats of the index finger

of your right hand.

Page 27: Body Language

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BODY LANGUAGEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

With practice and subtlety, mirroring, pacing, and leading can be effective in

many cases. Important: the overall goal is to make people comfortable and

more attentive.

Getting to the truth in an interview

An excerpt from the RCMP GAZETTE Vol.65, No.3, 2003.

We know that matching and mirroring body language, for instance, will create

rapport and trust. Not just body language but voice tone. If you’re in a really

somber, serious mood and I come in like Tony Robbins: “Hey, How’re ya

doing!” then we’re not going to connect.

You want to use a little bit of the same language as they’re using, the same

mood and the same rhythm. So for example, if they’re closed (interviewee has

arms crossed), then you close with them. And research shows that if you open

up (interviewer uncrosses his/her arms), within 90 seconds, they will follow

you. And if you open up physically, you open up psychologically.

Similarly in an emotional interview, when someone’s really pumped and angry,

then you get at the same intensity as them and then you come down and

they’ll follow you down. It’s a very powerful and subtle way to manage the

mood and direction of an interview.

Page 28: Body Language

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BODY LANGUAGEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

6. Culture

While some signals are universal – such as the practice of smiling and raising

our eyebrows when we greet someone – body language can vary from region

to region, and from country to country. If you plan to do business abroad, take

the time to research your destination’s culture and to learn as much as you can

about the communication cues most commonly used in that region. Observe

local people’s gestures, while controlling your own. And as you would at home,

use the techniques of mirroring, pacing and leading whenever appropriate to

establish rapport and credibility.

A world of difference *

Like the words we speak, body language can take on different meanings when

articulated in other parts of the world.

Australia: Thumbs up = Rude (the same in the Arab world); is also used for hitchhiking.

Belgium: Talking with one’s hand in one’s pocket is very rude.

China: Do not like to be touched by people they do not know.

France: The American sign OK (index and thumb together) means “zilch” or zero.

Japan: The American sign OK means money; direct eye contact is not the norm; smile can mean pleasure and also self-control (for example: hiding displeasure).

Pakistan: Muslim men avoid touching women. They will nod instead of shaking hands.

* For additional information please inquire about our international business etiquette solutions.

Page 29: Body Language

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BODY LANGUAGEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

7. Control

We are always sending messages and we are always being read. To ensure

that your body always conveys the right message, learn to control your facial

expressions, stances, gestures and tonality. This takes a lot of practice and

requires you to be constantly aware of what you are doing, but be assured that

over time, this will become a natural part of your everyday interactions.

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EYE CONTACTINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

Our eyes are amongst the most eloquent parts of our body, capable of

expressing a wide range of emotions – from love to hatred, approval to disdain,

enthusiasm to indifference. The eyes, as the expression goes, really do have it.

In North American culture, it is important to maintain eye contact with your

listeners when you are speaking with them. This indicates that you are self-

assured and sincere. Good eye

contact also compels the listener to

keep listening to you, and keeps the

conversation flowing.

In business, good eye contact is

an integral part of presenting a

professional and credible image.

Whether you are talking to a

prospective employer in a job

interview, or explaining the benefits

of your products to a potential client,

establishing and maintaining an

appropriate level of eye contact is a must. In fact, communication research

tells us that our messages will be received more favourably when we make

more eye contact. And the more you increase your eye contact, the more

powerful you will be perceived.

Page 31: Body Language

28

EYE CONTACTINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

A look at eye contact in other cultures

In other cultures – such as Chinese or Aboriginal – it is considered inappropriate

to look directly at a person, especially if that person is in a position of authority.

This may explain why teachers sometimes think that some of their students,

who tend to divert their gaze away from their instructors, “tune out” in class.

Do’s and don’ts:

Do use your eyes to establish a rapport.

Do use eye contact to draw the listener to you, so that your words will have the most impact.

Do be aware that looking over the shoulder of the person with whom you are speaking could be perceived as disinterest or rudeness. If the reason you are doing this is because you are waiting for someone to arrive, then be sure to explain this.

Do look at the server, and not at the menu, when you are ordering food in a restaurant.

Don’t look at people for too long, or too intensely; this can make them feel uncomfortable.

Don’t make too little eye contact; this conveys disinterest or insincerity.

Page 32: Body Language

29

EYE CONTACTINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

The different kinds of eye contact

The Business Gaze is used during a business or more serious discussion:

focus your gaze either just above or directly at the other person’s eyes.

.

The Social Gaze is directed between the eyes and the mouth.

The Intimate Gaze plays across the eyes and below the chin. Men and

women use this gaze, consciously or otherwise, to convey interest in each

other.

When people shut their eyes for a few seconds and avoid eye contact, they are

generally indicating that they no longer wish to listen.

Business Gaze Social Gaze Intimate Gaze

Page 33: Body Language

30

THE HANDSHAKEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

Getting a grip on the handshake

In business and social situations, the handshake is the most acceptable form of

touch. In fact, a handshake is an accepted greeting in almost every country.

How we shake hands communicates who we are, and how we feel about

ourselves and the people we meet. It tells people whether we are confident or

shy, decisive or tentative, friendly or aloof and, consequently, influences how

people perceive and treat us. A handshake can, in a very subtle way, establish

the balance of power during a meeting; the person who extends a hand first

immediately gains an advantage over the other person.

When should you shake hands?

Page 34: Body Language

31

THE HANDSHAKEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

Executing the perfect handshake

Extend your right hand with confidence and

get ready to connect. Keep your thumb up

and fingers straight to make it easy for others

to grasp your hand fully.

Connect with the other person’s hand web-

to-web. Ensure your hand is in a horizontal

position when you are connecting.

Move your right forearm – from the elbow to

your hand – up and down no more than two

times. This should be sufficient to complete a

handshake.

Release.

1

2

3

4

Page 35: Body Language

32

THE HANDSHAKEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

Incorrect forms of handshakes

The Bone Crusher

The Glove Handshake

The Fingertip Holder

We have all experienced these handshakes at one time or another. What was your

impression of the person delivering it and how did this first contact impact your

conversation or business meeting?

Page 36: Body Language

33

THE HANDSHAKEINTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

Try your hand at this exercise!

How well do you understand handshake etiquette? Test your knowledge by

answering the following questions with True (T) or False (F).

Before leaving for a business or social gathering, apply a bit of perfume or scented lotion on your hands. This sends out the message that you are fastidious and take pride in your grooming.

Keep your drink in your left hand during a cocktail party. Your right hand should always be free.

If your hands tend to be clammy, try applying a fragrance-free antiperspirant.

Rings on your right-hand fingers can interfere with a handshake.

Women should always initiate a handshake, and men should always wait for a woman to extend her hand.

It is ill-mannered to refuse to shake someone’s hand when they have a cold.

If a person fails to notice your extended hand, avoid embarrassing them by just walking away and trying again later.

Your name badge is placed on the left side.

Are you an old hand when it comes to handshakes?

Page 37: Body Language

Corporate Class Inc. - North American Business Etiquette 34

Copyright ©

2003 - 2007 Corporate C

lass Inc. - All R

ights Reserved

CORPORATE CLASS INC. NORTH AMERICAN BUSINESS ETIQUETTE

Corporate Class Inc.

44 Charles Street West

Suite 4711

Toronto, Canada M4Y 1R8

Tel 416-967-1221

Fax 416-967-2818

General Inquiries

[email protected]

Web Site

www.corporateclassinc.com

FINAL THOUGHTS

We trust you will find this guide to be a very handy tool for many years to

come. You now have techniques, tips and advice to carry you successfully

through any business situation. You are able to better understand the

many challenges of business and the solutions available to deal with them.

Discipline is the key and practice makes perfect!

We sincerely hope that we have informed and equipped you with the skills to

interact more effectively, comfortably and confidently with co-workers, clients

and other key stakeholders, both on the job and in everyday life.

We wish you much success in all your endeavours!

Please contact us at [email protected] should you have any

questions.

Enjoy!

Diane Craig