Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul EXTRACT

SNEAK PEEK!

5.11.14

The beach was a few hours’ drive away, so I The beach was a few hours’ drive away, so I decided to take a nap in the backseat until we got decided to take a nap in the backseat until we got The beach was a few hours’ drive away, so I decided to take a nap in the backseat until we got The beach was a few hours’ drive away, so I

there. And believe me, with all the junk piled up in there. And believe me, with all the junk piled up in the back of the car, it wasn’t easy.the back of the car, it wasn’t easy.

I woke up when Dad slowed down. I thought we I woke up when Dad slowed down. I thought we were at the beach, but we hadn’t even gotten to were at the beach, but we hadn’t even gotten to the bridge yet. It was Friday afternoon, and the bridge yet. It was Friday afternoon, and it seemed like it seemed like the bridge yet. It was Friday afternoon, and it seemed like the bridge yet. It was Friday afternoon, and

EVERYONEEVERYONEthe bridge yet. It was Friday afternoon, and

EVERYONEthe bridge yet. It was Friday afternoon, and

had the same idea had the same idea the bridge yet. It was Friday afternoon, and

had the same idea the bridge yet. It was Friday afternoon, and

WEWE did. did.

When we were about a quarter of a mile from When we were about a quarter of a mile from the bridge, I could tell Dad was starting to the bridge, I could tell Dad was starting to get nervous.get nervous.

A family road trip is supposed to be a lot of fun . . . unless, of course, you’re the Heffl eys. The journey starts off full of promise, then quickly takes several wrong turns. Gas station bathrooms, crazed seagulls, a fender bender, and a runaway pig—not exactly Greg Heffl ey’s idea of a good time. But even the worst road trip can turn into an adventure—and this is one the Heffl eys won’t soon forget.

About

He He He HATESHATESHATES bridges, because for some reason he bridges, because for some reason he bridges, because for some reason he gets dizzy whenever he has to drive over one.gets dizzy whenever he has to drive over one.gets dizzy whenever he has to drive over one.

The bridge to the beach was one of those kinds The bridge to the beach was one of those kinds The bridge to the beach was one of those kinds that’s really high above the water, and I’m sure that’s really high above the water, and I’m sure that’s really high above the water, and I’m sure Dad wasn’t looking forward to being stuck on it Dad wasn’t looking forward to being stuck on it Dad wasn’t looking forward to being stuck on it that’s really high above the water, and I’m sure Dad wasn’t looking forward to being stuck on it that’s really high above the water, and I’m sure that’s really high above the water, and I’m sure Dad wasn’t looking forward to being stuck on it that’s really high above the water, and I’m sure

for the next half hour.for the next half hour.for the next half hour.

Mom told Rodrick Mom told Rodrick Mom told Rodrick HEHE should drive, because she should drive, because she needed to wake Manny up and feed him lunch. So needed to wake Manny up and feed him lunch. So needed to wake Manny up and feed him lunch. So we pulled over and everyone switched seats. Dad we pulled over and everyone switched seats. Dad we pulled over and everyone switched seats. Dad needed to wake Manny up and feed him lunch. So we pulled over and everyone switched seats. Dad needed to wake Manny up and feed him lunch. So needed to wake Manny up and feed him lunch. So we pulled over and everyone switched seats. Dad needed to wake Manny up and feed him lunch. So

took my place in the back so he wouldn’t see the took my place in the back so he wouldn’t see the took my place in the back so he wouldn’t see the we pulled over and everyone switched seats. Dad took my place in the back so he wouldn’t see the we pulled over and everyone switched seats. Dad we pulled over and everyone switched seats. Dad took my place in the back so he wouldn’t see the we pulled over and everyone switched seats. Dad

bridge out the front window, and I moved to the bridge out the front window, and I moved to the bridge out the front window, and I moved to the took my place in the back so he wouldn’t see the bridge out the front window, and I moved to the took my place in the back so he wouldn’t see the took my place in the back so he wouldn’t see the bridge out the front window, and I moved to the took my place in the back so he wouldn’t see the

middle row.middle row.middle row.

We have a rule that the person who’s driving gets We have a rule that the person who’s driving gets We have a rule that the person who’s driving gets to control the radio, and when Rodrick got in the to control the radio, and when Rodrick got in the to control the radio, and when Rodrick got in the driver’s seat, he blasted his heavy metal music.driver’s seat, he blasted his heavy metal music.driver’s seat, he blasted his heavy metal music.

I could tell that wasn’t helping Dad with his nerves.I could tell that wasn’t helping Dad with his nerves.

We were only going about three miles an hour, and We were only going about three miles an hour, and it looked like we were gonna be stuck on the bridge it looked like we were gonna be stuck on the bridge We were only going about three miles an hour, and it looked like we were gonna be stuck on the bridge We were only going about three miles an hour, and

even longer than I expected. Mom passed around even longer than I expected. Mom passed around a grocery bag with some snacks she packed, and I a grocery bag with some snacks she packed, and I grabbed the bag of cheese curls.grabbed the bag of cheese curls.a grocery bag with some snacks she packed, and I grabbed the bag of cheese curls.a grocery bag with some snacks she packed, and I

There was a seagull sitting on the railing of the There was a seagull sitting on the railing of the bridge next to the car, and it looked right at me. bridge next to the car, and it looked right at me.

I guess I kind of felt sorry for it, so I tossed I guess I kind of felt sorry for it, so I tossed I guess I kind of felt sorry for it, so I tossed a cheese curl out of the moonroof. I have to say, a cheese curl out of the moonroof. I have to say, a cheese curl out of the moonroof. I have to say, I guess I kind of felt sorry for it, so I tossed a cheese curl out of the moonroof. I have to say, I guess I kind of felt sorry for it, so I tossed I guess I kind of felt sorry for it, so I tossed a cheese curl out of the moonroof. I have to say, I guess I kind of felt sorry for it, so I tossed

I was pretty impressed when the seagull caught I was pretty impressed when the seagull caught I was pretty impressed when the seagull caught a cheese curl out of the moonroof. I have to say, I was pretty impressed when the seagull caught a cheese curl out of the moonroof. I have to say, a cheese curl out of the moonroof. I have to say, I was pretty impressed when the seagull caught a cheese curl out of the moonroof. I have to say,

the thing in mid-air.the thing in mid-air.the thing in mid-air.I was pretty impressed when the seagull caught the thing in mid-air.I was pretty impressed when the seagull caught I was pretty impressed when the seagull caught the thing in mid-air.I was pretty impressed when the seagull caught

I was about to throw it I was about to throw it I was about to throw it ANOTHERANOTHER one, but Mom one, but Mom stopped me. She said seagulls are really aggressive, stopped me. She said seagulls are really aggressive, stopped me. She said seagulls are really aggressive, and giving them people food is a bad idea.and giving them people food is a bad idea.and giving them people food is a bad idea.stopped me. She said seagulls are really aggressive, and giving them people food is a bad idea.stopped me. She said seagulls are really aggressive, stopped me. She said seagulls are really aggressive, and giving them people food is a bad idea.stopped me. She said seagulls are really aggressive,

She was right about the “aggressive” thing, She was right about the “aggressive” thing, She was right about the “aggressive” thing, because two seconds later the seagull was on top because two seconds later the seagull was on top because two seconds later the seagull was on top of the car, and you could tell it wanted more food.of the car, and you could tell it wanted more food.of the car, and you could tell it wanted more food.

I threw another one at it to try to make it go I threw another one at it to try to make it go away, but the seagull bobbled the cheese curl, away, but the seagull bobbled the cheese curl, I threw another one at it to try to make it go away, but the seagull bobbled the cheese curl, I threw another one at it to try to make it go

which fell right back into the car.which fell right back into the car.away, but the seagull bobbled the cheese curl, which fell right back into the car.away, but the seagull bobbled the cheese curl,

That’s when things got That’s when things got BADBAD..

The seagull hopped down The seagull hopped down INTOINTO the car and ate the car and ate the cheese curl off the floor.the cheese curl off the floor.

For a second, everyone was in a state of shock For a second, everyone was in a state of shock For a second, everyone was in a state of shock that a real live seagull was in our car, and nobody that a real live seagull was in our car, and nobody that a real live seagull was in our car, and nobody For a second, everyone was in a state of shock that a real live seagull was in our car, and nobody For a second, everyone was in a state of shock For a second, everyone was in a state of shock that a real live seagull was in our car, and nobody For a second, everyone was in a state of shock

moved a muscle.moved a muscle.moved a muscle.that a real live seagull was in our car, and nobody moved a muscle.that a real live seagull was in our car, and nobody that a real live seagull was in our car, and nobody moved a muscle.that a real live seagull was in our car, and nobody

The seagull squawked a few times and then tried The seagull squawked a few times and then tried The seagull squawked a few times and then tried to fly back out the way it came in. But it missed to fly back out the way it came in. But it missed to fly back out the way it came in. But it missed to fly back out the way it came in. But it missed to fly back out the way it came in. But it missed the opening by about two feet and smacked into the opening by about two feet and smacked into the opening by about two feet and smacked into to fly back out the way it came in. But it missed the opening by about two feet and smacked into to fly back out the way it came in. But it missed to fly back out the way it came in. But it missed the opening by about two feet and smacked into to fly back out the way it came in. But it missed

the roof.the roof.the roof.the opening by about two feet and smacked into the roof.the opening by about two feet and smacked into the opening by about two feet and smacked into the roof.the opening by about two feet and smacked into

Then it just went completely nuts, flying around Then it just went completely nuts, flying around Then it just went completely nuts, flying around the car and crashing into the windows. Everyone the car and crashing into the windows. Everyone the car and crashing into the windows. Everyone Then it just went completely nuts, flying around the car and crashing into the windows. Everyone Then it just went completely nuts, flying around Then it just went completely nuts, flying around the car and crashing into the windows. Everyone Then it just went completely nuts, flying around

was in a total panic, and feathers and cheese curls was in a total panic, and feathers and cheese curls was in a total panic, and feathers and cheese curls the car and crashing into the windows. Everyone was in a total panic, and feathers and cheese curls the car and crashing into the windows. Everyone the car and crashing into the windows. Everyone was in a total panic, and feathers and cheese curls the car and crashing into the windows. Everyone

were everywhere.were everywhere.were everywhere.

Then the seagull got greedy and grabbed my bag Then the seagull got greedy and grabbed my bag of cheese curls off the floor. But I snagged it and of cheese curls off the floor. But I snagged it and Then the seagull got greedy and grabbed my bag of cheese curls off the floor. But I snagged it and Then the seagull got greedy and grabbed my bag

held on for dear life. Everyone was yelling at me to held on for dear life. Everyone was yelling at me to let go of the bag, but I wasn’t giving in.let go of the bag, but I wasn’t giving in.held on for dear life. Everyone was yelling at me to let go of the bag, but I wasn’t giving in.held on for dear life. Everyone was yelling at me to

Finally, the seagull beat me in our tug-of-war and Finally, the seagull beat me in our tug-of-war and flew straight up through the moonroof, taking flew straight up through the moonroof, taking Finally, the seagull beat me in our tug-of-war and flew straight up through the moonroof, taking Finally, the seagull beat me in our tug-of-war and

the bag with it. For a second it seemed like the the bag with it. For a second it seemed like the whole incident was over. But the seagull didn’t get whole incident was over. But the seagull didn’t get far with the bag.far with the bag.

About three-quarters of the cheese curls ended up About three-quarters of the cheese curls ended up About three-quarters of the cheese curls ended up BACKBACKBACK in the car, and from there, it was a total in the car, and from there, it was a total BACK in the car, and from there, it was a total BACKBACK in the car, and from there, it was a total BACKnightmare.nightmare.nightmare.

A few of the seagulls flew up front, and Rodrick A few of the seagulls flew up front, and Rodrick A few of the seagulls flew up front, and Rodrick got so freaked out he hit the gas. When the got so freaked out he hit the gas. When the got so freaked out he hit the gas. When the birds finally cleared out and things settled down, birds finally cleared out and things settled down, birds finally cleared out and things settled down, we had a whole we had a whole we had a whole birds finally cleared out and things settled down, we had a whole birds finally cleared out and things settled down, birds finally cleared out and things settled down, we had a whole birds finally cleared out and things settled down,

NEWNEW problem to deal with. problem to deal with. birds finally cleared out and things settled down,

problem to deal with. birds finally cleared out and things settled down,

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