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Page 1: Waiting Room Book 2011
Page 2: Waiting Room Book 2011

2 You can't teach an old dog new ..........math.

WAITING

ROOM

B O K

• Humor • Puzzles • Trivia • FUN FOR ALL AGES!• Distributed to all advertisers...the Waiting Room Book is for YOUR

patients and their children to enjoy in your waiting room.• Filled with Humor, Puzzles, Trivia, Games, Riddles and much, much more.• LONG SHELF LIFE! Your advertisement will be seen in the Waiting Room Fun Book for one full year!

For details and to reserve your space, just call Jack Kinney at Kinney Enterprises, Inc. • Bath, NY • 607-776-7909

* Space Options are available to fit every budget.Display sizes range from 1/4 to 1/3 to 1/2 to full pages, and Smaller Block Ads.

* All Display Ads also have optional 5 Month Split Billing for added convenience.* Spot Color is available - Make Your Ad Standout!!

DON’T BE LEFT OUT OFNEXT YEAR’S VERY SPECIAL PUBLICATION!!

BRAND NEW for 2011-12! The Waiting Room Book is now on The Evening Tribune’s Website!!! Just go to eveningtribune.com ! click on ‘special publications’ ! click on ‘yearly & special’

! click on ‘The Waiting Room Book’ ! click on the arrow to flip through the pages

The Waiting Room Book has somethinginteresting for everyone. Whether you’rea bona fide trivia expert, or just enjoy agood chuckle, you’re guaranteed to find

something to satisfy.

Turned WagonIt seems a young farm boy accidentally overturned his wagon load of corn.The farmer who lived nearby heard the noise. “Hey Willis!” the farmer yelled.“Forget your troubles. Come in and eat dinner with us. Then I!ll help you get thewagon back up.” That!s mighty nice of you,” Willis answered, “but I don!t thinkPa would like me to.”“Nonsence, come on!” the farmer insisted. “Well, okay,” the boy finally agreed,“but Pa won!t like it.”After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. “I feel a lot better now, but I knowPa is going to be real upset.”“Don!t be so foolish!” the neighbor said with a smile. “By the way, where is yourPa?”“Under the wagon.”

This publicationis supported by the following:

Arkport Cycles 14Beaver’s Pharmacy 5Everything Medical 10John Taggart 11Knowles LP Gas 13Lake Country Estates, Inc 6Nicholson Pharmacy 7Ponderosa/Bath 9Sears 8St. James 3St. James Clinic Operations 16Wegmans Pharmacy 4

Page 3: Waiting Room Book 2011

3

Armadillos can walk underwater.•

Pigs, walruses and light-colored horses can be sunburned.•

The only domestic animal not mentioned in the Bible is the cat.•

Mice, whales, elephants, giraffes and man all haveseven neck vertebra.

•Goat's eyes have rectangular pupils.

•Murphy's Oil Soap is the chemical most commonly used

to clean elephants.•

There are only two animals with blue tongues, theBlack Bear and the Chow dog.

1. What was the first Web browser called?•

2. Sugar was based on which Marilyn Monroe movie?•

3. Which Russian city was famous for itsState Circus?

•4. Pokemon is an abbreviation of what?

5. In which Austrian city, home of Mozart, has an an-nual music festival been held since 1920?

6. Who is the Princess in the Super Mario Gang?

Answer on Page 14

Two's company, three's ..........the Musketeers.

Did You Know Answers from above:1: Mosaic 2: Some Like it Hot; 3: Moscow4: Pocket Monster; 5: Salzburg; 6: Daisy

Page 4: Waiting Room Book 2011

4

30-dayprescriptions*

90-dayprescriptions*

antibiotics*with prescription

Don't bite the hand that ..........looks dirty.

Page 5: Waiting Room Book 2011

5

7 Main Street, Canisteo(607) 698-4641

Beaver’s Pharmacy

...and you thought delivery was just for pizzas.

Homebound? Elderly? We’ll be happy to deliver your prescription --at no charge to youin Hornell & Canisteo.

Keep your dollars in thecommunity:Support independent pharmacies.

Camels have three eyelids to protectthemselves from blowing sand.

•Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds,

while dogs only have about ten.•

The only domestic animal not mentioned in the Bible is the cat.•

Cats in Halifax, Nova Scotia, have a very highprobability of having six toes.

•An adult lion's roar can be heard up to five miles away, and

warns off intruders or reunites scattered members of the pride.•

Dolphins sleep at night just below the surface of the water.They frequently rise to the surface for air.

•Beaver teeth are so sharp that Native Americans once used

them as knife blades.

No news is..........impossible

Page 6: Waiting Room Book 2011

6 Don't put off till tomorrow what..........you put on to go to bed.

Beautiful................................Quiet

Mobile Home CommunitySales & Service

New & Used Homes

Available For Sale...Setup & Ready for YOU!

Ask about our Storage Units

Corner of May & E. Washington StreetBath, NY • Phone: 607-776-7187

Lots available in Savona Estates!

Every year as the summer draws to a close, kidsacross the country return to school. Some ride the bus,others walk or ride their bikes, and some have theirparents drop them off. No matter what the mode oftransportation, kids need to be careful when traveling toand from school. Unfortunately, as the school year pro-gresses, many kids get caught up in other things andforget about safety, resulting in thousands of injuries,and in some cases, fatalities.

Don!t become a statistic. Take this School Safety Chal-lenge and refresh yourself on the basics.

Riding the Bus1) You should stand back away from thebus until it comes to a complete stopand the driver tells you to enter.

2) When being dropped off, you shouldalways walk around the back ofthe bus.

Walking or Riding a Bike3) As long as there isn!t any trafficcoming, you can cross a street at ared light.

4) You should always get off your bikeand walk it through intersections.

Riding in a Car5) Most traffic accidents occur closeto home.

T F

T F

T F

T F

T F

Answer on Page 14

Page 7: Waiting Room Book 2011

7 Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and..........you have to blow your nose.

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car.

I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wantedpaychecks.

I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in adark room.

Not So Deep Thoughts

Page 8: Waiting Room Book 2011

8

OWNED AND OPERATED BY:Randy & Carol Gudeahn (#3024)

ADDRESS: St. Rt. 36, Hornell(next to WalMart)

PHONE: 607-324-4162

HORNELLFIND US ON FACEBOOK!

Who was the first president of the United States? Howmany letters are in the alphabet? What is the sum of twoplus two? No matter if you!re a first grader or a senior inhigh school, you probably knowthe answers to these questions.But did you know...

• Egypt and Sumeria were the first civilizations toestablish schools.

• Daniel Webster published the first dictionary in 1828.• Friedrich Froebel, a German educator, isconsidered the “Father of Kindergarten.” Hefounded the first kindergarten in 1837.

• The United States Department of Educationwas established in 1867.

• In 2000–2001 there were 12.2 millioncomputers in the country!s 110,000elementary and secondary schools.That!s one computer for every four students.

You may not recognize the nameCecil B. DeMille, but if you like to watch movies, hisname is one you!ll want to remember. Born August 12,1881, Cecil B. DeMille is one of the greatest filmmakersof all time. Not only did he produce successful movies,like The Ten Commandments and Cleopatra, but hewas one of the few to survive the transition from silentto sound films.

The younger of two sons, Cecil was born into a theatri-cal family. His father, Henry, was a preacher who taughtEnglish at Columbia University and wrote plays in hisspare time. His mother, Mathilda, also wrote plays, andafter the death of her husband in 1893, opened aschool for girls in her home, and later, ran a successfulproduction company.

Cecil attended Pennsylvania Military College. Duringthe Spanish-American War, he left school and tried toenlist, but he was too young. Aware of Cecil!s interest inthe theater, his mother enrolled him in the Academy ofthe Dramatic Arts. There, Cecil followed in the footstepsof his brother, William, and tried his hand at acting andwriting. In 1900, Cecil made his debut on Broadway.

Cecil spent the next several years working at hismother!s production company and helping his brotherwrite plays. In 1913, Cecil formed his own companywith vaudeville musician Jess L. Lasky and glove sales-man Samuel Goldfish (who later changed his last nameto Goldwyn). The company was called the Jesse L.Lasky Feature Play Company, and in 1914, Cecilhelped direct its first film, The Squaw Man. The film wasa success, and Cecil became a major name in Holly-wood.

Before long, the Lasky Company grew and its namewas changed to Paramount. Cecil spent most of his ca-reer there, bridging the gap from silent to sound filmseasily and producing over 70 films. With his wife, Con-stance, he also helped raise four children, one of whom,Katherine, acted in many of his films. On January 21,1959, Cecil died at the age of 77.

Children should be seen and..........not spanked or grounded.

Page 9: Waiting Room Book 2011

9

382 W. Morris St., Bath, NY607-776-4381

$5 Lunch Buffet$8 Dinner Buffet

ProudlyServing

With adult beverage purchase. Cannot be used in combination with any other coupon, discount or

promotional offer. Tax not included. Valid at participating Steakhouses.

ProudlyServing

Cannot be used in combination with any other coupon, discount or promotional offer.

Tax not included.Valid at participating Steakhouses.

$5.00 OFFany $25.00 purchase

If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

We never really grow up,we only learn how to act in public.

Evening news is where they begin with 'Goodevening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

Not So Deep Thoughts

If at first you don!t succeed..........get new batteries.

Page 10: Waiting Room Book 2011

10

7108 E. Washington St., Ext.Bath, NY 14810 • 607-776-8000109 Chemung StreetCorning, NY 14830 • 607-936-2044919 Westfall Rd., Bldg. B, Suite 200Rochester, NY 14618 • 585-271-2080

Answer on Page 14

The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so hecan tell when he's really in trouble.

Laugh at your problems, everybody else does.

Not So Deep Thoughts

Where there is smoke there is..........pollution.

Page 11: Waiting Room Book 2011

11

From A Mother With LoveDear Child,I am writing this slow because I know that you can'tread fast.We don't live where we did when you left home.Your dad read in the paper that most accidents hap-pen within 20 miles from your home so we moved.I won't be able to send you the address, as the lastfamily that lived here took the house numbers whenthey left so that they wouldn't have to change their ad-dress.This place is real nice. It even has a washing machine.I'm not sure if it works too well though.Last week I put a load in, pulled the chain, and haven'tseen them since.The weather isn't too bad here., it only rained twice lastweek, The first time it rained for three days and the sec-ond time for four days.The coat you wanted me to send you, your Uncle Stevesaid it would be a little too heavy to send in the mailwith the buttons on, so we cut them off and put them inthe pockets.We got another bill from the funeral home.They said if we don't make the last payment onGrandma's grave, up she comes.John locked his keys in the car yesterday. We wereworried because it took him two hours to get me andShelby out.Your sister had a baby this morning but I haven't foundout what it is yet, so I don't know if you're an aunt or anuncle. If the baby is a girl, your sister is going to nameit after me, she's going to call it Mom.Uncle Pete fell in a whiskey vat last week. Some mantried to pull him out but he fought them off anddrowned. We had him cremated and he burned forthree days.Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pick-uptruck. Ralph was driving. He rolled down the windowand swam to safety. Your two friends were in the back.They drowned because they couldn't get the tailgatedown.There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing muchhas happened.PS, I was going to send you some money but the en-velope was already sealed.

On September 7, 1860, in Greenwich, New York, aunique person was born. For most of her life, AnnaMary Robertson Moses lived in a very ordinary way.When she was twelve years old, she left home to earnher living as a hired girl. All her life, she worked as afarm wife, helped her husband, Thomas, with a milkroute and raised her five children.

When Anna Moses was about 70 years old, though,she began to paint. She painted pictures of things sheremembered from her childhood. She also painted pic-tures of things she remembered from spending time inthe country. After a while, her paintings became veryfamous. Because she was so old when she began topaint, many people began to call Anna “Grandma.” Sotoday, Anna Mary Robertson Moses is known simplyas Grandma Moses!

Why was Grandma Moses unique? She was not afraidto try new things. Many people do not do new and dif-ferent things once they are grown up. Grandma Mosesbegan painting pictures—something she had neverdone before—with no formal training. People likeGrandma Moses! art is because it is simple. GrandmaMoses liked bright colors, and her cheerful memoriesand bright colors make her pictures fun to look at.

A penny saved is..........not much.

Page 12: Waiting Room Book 2011

12

Born in Maryland in 1821, she escaped from slavery in the late 1840s and joined the abolitionist movement against slavery. Braving capture and death, she returned many times to the slave states and helped at least 300 slaves escape to freedom in the North. She served as a nurse, spy and scout for the Union forces during the Civil War and was buried with full military honors when she died in 1913.

She was active in the NAACP in Montgomery, Alabama, in the early 1950s. On Dec. 1, 1955, she refused to give up her bus seat to a white man, as required by law in Montgomery. Her arrest and $14 fine served as a catalyst that sparked the civil rights movement in the South. A successful boycott of the bus system catapulted both her and the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. into the spotlight. She remained active in the struggle for equal rights after the boycott and received many honors over the years for her dedication and inspiration.

A multi-sport star in high school and college, he signed a contract with the Brooklyn Dodgers in August 1945. After playing in the minor leagues, he became the first black player in the major leagues in the modern era in April 1947. Named Rookie of the Year that season and the Most Valuable Player two years later, he endured taunts and death threats on and off the field. After retiring in 1957, he remained active in business and public affairs and received numerous honors, including being elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame in his first year of eligibility. He died in 1972.

Jackie Robinson

Rosa Parks

Harriet Tubman

Did you know?

You can lead a horse to water but..........how?

Page 13: Waiting Room Book 2011

13

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BillingA doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party.Their conversation was constantly interrupted by peo-ple describing their ailments and asking the doctor forfree medical advice.After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor askedthe lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from ask-ing you for legal advice when you're out of the of-fice?""I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I sendthem a bill."The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try.The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctorprepared the bills.When he went to place them in his mailbox, he founda bill from the lawyer.

Answer on Page 14

Always borrow money from a pessimist.He won't expect it back.

He who smiles in a crisis has found someoneto blame.

My opinions may have changed,but not the fact that I am right.

When in doubt, mumble.

Not So Deep Thoughts

It is always darkest before..........Daylight Savings Time.

Page 14: Waiting Room Book 2011

14

Seek and Find Answerfrom Page 3

Seek and Find Answerfrom Page 13

Connect the Dots Answerfrom Page 6

Seek and Find Answerfrom Page 10

Whatever you are,be a good one.

- Abraham Lincoln

Wherever you go,go with allyour heart.- Confucius

Strike while the..........bug is close.

Page 15: Waiting Room Book 2011

15

Kinney Enterprises, Inc. • Bath, NY • 607-776-7909

eveningtribune.comOVER 900,000 PAGE

VIEWS PER MONTH!BRAND NEW for 2011-12!

The Waiting Room Book is now on The Evening Tribune’s Website!!

! Just go to eveningtribune.com ! click on ‘special publications’

! click on ‘yearly & special’ ! click on

‘The Waiting Room Book’ ! click on the arrow

to flip through the pages

is online!

Don!t change horses..........until they stop running.

Page 16: Waiting Room Book 2011

16

430 Canisteo Street ~ Hornell, NY 14843(607) 324-0604

Andres I. Rubert, MD ~ Gynecology & ObstetricsDr. Rubert offers comprehensive gynecology and obstetrics services. He is a Board-eligible Obstetrician and Gynecologist who specializes in gynecology, obstetrics, infertility, reproductive medicine, adolescent gynecology, and laparoscopic surgery. His goal is to provide prompt, thorough and compassionate care, while helping patients learn more about their health.

* Accepting New Patients *

Pasquale Picco, MD, FCCP ~ Pulmonary & Internal MedicineDr. Picco is Board Certified in Pulmonary and Internal Medicine. His Pulmonary Specialty interests include: asthma, emphysema/COPD, obstructive sleep apnea syndrome, lung cancer, infectious diseases of the lung, and other lung disorders. His Internal Medicine Specialist interests include: hypertension, diabetes, lipid disorders, and cardiovascular disease.~ Serving the Hornell community and surrounding areas for over 16 years ~

Irvin C. Oh, MD ~ Orthopedic Surgeon

Don’t let ligament damage sideline you in the future... Many sports injuries can be treated with arthroscopic surgery, a minimally invasive method that uses a camera and special instruments to look inside a joint and repair it. Dr. Oh, Orthopedic Surgeon, can help you get back in the game. Call your primary physician for a referral to Dr. Oh.

432 Canisteo Street ~ Hornell, NY 14843(607) 324-8195

20 Elm Street ~ Hornell, NY 14843(607) 324-3239