The Garden of Peace Shalom Arush "Freda",. Each spouse is 100% responsible for peace in the home, shalom bayit שלום בית. Neither should police the other.

The Garden of PeaceShalom Arush

"Freda" <[email protected]>,

Each spouse is 100% responsible for peace in the home, shalom bayit שלום .בית

• Neither should police the other.• Therefore each spouse should

read the book for them, NOT their partner’s.

• Advice to women, prohibition to men.

Remaining single: easier. • Cor. 7.28 CJB It is just that those

who get married will have the normal problems of married life.

• But those who marry will face many troubles in this life. NIV 25

• Tikkun תקון, correction 26 lot in life Ro 8.28

• Superspiritual?

Tehilim/Ps 45.13 CJB “Inside [the palace], the king's daughter looks splendid

)'ל )'ה-ָּכ )ָּד )-בו --ב.ת ָּכ 2יֶמ'ה ֶמ0ל0ְך ְּפ)-ִנArush: The entire dignity of a

princess is internal.A woman’s oxygen• A woman’s soul thrives on

dignity

• Honor first and foremost form the feeling that she’s the most important thing in her husband’s life: he needs to internalize and RADIATE that message 66 [McCartney]

• Wife of a critical husband. Never criticize [?????] 38

• Beresheet/Gen. 5.1 called their name Adam

Mirror•Enables your soul correction: Tikkun•Any flaw, mistake, or shortcoming is really your own reflection!!•No comments please!•Electron microscope•Shock treatment attention to our faults•Avraham rebuked when Sarah laughed

•Angry at the mirror, the sound recorder?•Secret sins•Vayikra/Lev 19. 17-18 Rebuke your neighbor frankly, so that you won't carry sin because of him…love your neighbor as yourself; I am ADONI. 52

Not worthy to do so: 2 Cor 2. 15-16 For to God we are the aroma of the Messiah, both among those being saved and among those being lost; to the latter, we are the smell of death leading only to more death; but to the former, we are the sweet smell of life leading to more life. Who is equal to such a task?

Women and criticism•Dependent on her husband for dignity

)ת• )ו5ָּד-ָּדו Hit-bodeh-dut ה2ת-בseclusion, secret, private prayer

First Place = in her husband’s priorities. She needs to feel it.

i) 1 Kefa 3.7 giving honor to the woman, as to the weaker vessel,

ii) giving honor to the woman who is the feebler vessel, but who has an equal part in the heritage of the grace of life; so that you may not be kept from prayer.

iii) they are more delicate than you. Treat them with respect,

Central axis•When she needs something, jump to do •When she opens her mouth, he should FOCUShis ears as if MOST important.•When she feels first place joy, strength, vitality

The needless list, eliminated•Chronic lateness•Inattentiveness when she speaks

Beresheet/Gen 3.16 You shall desire your man, and he shall rule over you.

-ֶא0ל )ֶא -ו -הו - ו )ק'ת7ְך - ת)-ש8ו ֶא2יש78ְך--ִיֶמ-ש8'ל )'ְך ב

A husband governs his wife’s moods. She can have genuine happiness only through him, his attention, love, and respect.Before sin no death, so now

she receives life and vitality from husband

By prioritizing her, he leaves the false interp of ֶמשל “military rule” physical might 75

Spiritual growthMishlei/Prov 16.7 When a man's ways please ADONI, he makes even the man's enemies be at peace with him i) A man’s role as a giver is the backbone of this entire book.ii) Men are created as givers, and women as receivers. Women don’t need to be taught how to be women, receivers. In this men have lost their male characteristics.

Lk 6 33-36 What credit is it to you if you do good only to those who do good to you? Even sinners do that. What credit is it to you if you lend only to those who you expect will pay you back? Even sinners lend to each other, expecting to be repaid in full. But love…do good, and lend expecting nothing back! Your reward will be great, and you will be children of Ha`Elyon;

for he is kind to the ungrateful and the wicked. Show compassion, just as your Father shows compassion.

To internalize all these traits, one must pray.

Female husbands to become male.•Give his wife honor and attention•Forgiving and able to cope•Happy and smiling •NEVER SAY, “She offended me.” A man shouldn’t get offended. Ps

119.165 Great peace have they which love thy law: and nothing shall offend them. •“When a man feels offended, it means that he wants honor…a female trait.”

“Women can’t stand a man who gets offended and insulted.”

Evil inclination yester hara יצרGen 4.7, Psalm 51.7, Ro. 7.14 הרע

i) For a man principally expressed in sexual lust ?ii) For a woman, principally expressed in desire for honor/attention [no sex drive according to Dobson, attention drive] ?

iii) A woman’s joy and vitality from the honor/attention she receives from her husband.iv) Money, helpfulness, loyalty all useless w/o respect and loving attention miserable, hopeless, broken hostile.

Dvarim/Dt. 16.11,14You are to rejoice in the presence of ADONI your God - you, your sons and daughters, your male and female slaves, the L'vi'im living in your towns, and the foreigners, orphans and widows living among you …Rejoice at your festival - you, your sons and daughters, your male and female slaves, the L'vi'im, and the foreigners, orphans and widows living among you.

Sex Begins in the Kitchen: Because Love Is an All-Day Affair Dr Kevin Leman (1) He must ask permission. Such a thing as marital rape?(2) First praise and placate her…forbidden to lie with her 1 Cor 7.4-5 “Do not deprive…” Instruction for demand or for serving?(3) Gen 28.11 a bed of stones with the Presence of the Ruakh >> a kingly bed

The home is the wife’s domain 115(1) His wife is the General of the home, and he is a private. [!!](2) He might even be the Commander-in-Chief or the President. But, when he walks through his front door of his house, he reverts to being a private and awaits orders. [!!]

ii)122¶4 עזר כנגדו ezer k’neg-do “a helper against him” iii) if he merits…personal holinessiv) 122 thru the eyes of emuna =

active, working faith = אמונה Gal 5.6 Prov 16.7

v) Shalom Bayit שלום בית, Peace in the home, is supernatural

Apparent contraction between Ex

nיהlם אiישm אlל-אkִחiיו 25.20 ְפoנfaces toward one another, and

2Chron 3.13 ִיתkrבsם לlיהn faces ְפoנtoward the house. Talmudic explanation, Bava Batra 99a, When Israel please G-d, cherubs face each other like lovers into each other’s eyes, like G-d looking at Israel..

When Israel disobeys, cherubs turn away, like G-d turns away. [?]

Analogous to Shalom Bayit שלום supernatural ,ביתPeace in the home is a certificate on the wall of the couple’s [particularly the husband’s]

spirituality. בית can also mean inward

When a husband craves his wife, he’ll ultimate hate her. [sex objectification.]

Yeshua Mtt 5.28-29 A man who even looks at a woman with the purpose of lusting after her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye makes you sin, gouge it out and throw it away! Better that you should lose one part of you than have your whole body thrown into Gei-Hinnom.

i) “Women look only to spiritual intimacy and consideration – this is what they love.” Constant closeness of mind and soul or disgust, degradation, pain.ii) With herGal 2.20 p140Confess?

)ת )ו5ָּד-ָּדו hit-bod’dut literally ה2ת-ב‘seclusion’ according to R. Arush ‘talking to G-d in our own language’ as opposed to Siddur Distress?1 Cor 7.10-14 from the Lord: a woman is not to separate herself from her husband.  But if she does separate herself, she is to remain single or be reconciled with her husband. Also, a husband is not to leave his wife.

1 Cor 7.10-14 To the rest I say - I, not the Lord: if any brother has a wife who is not a believer, and she is satisfied to go on living with him, he should not leave her. Also, if any woman has an unbelieving husband who is satisfied to go on living with her, she is not to leave him. For the unbelieving husband has been set aside for God by the wife,

1 Cor 7.10-14 and the unbelieving wife has been set aside for God by the brother - otherwise your children would be "unclean," but as it is, they are set aside for God. 

Accept the situation with emunah

kה rנ faith, looked for the = אwמוmessages that HaShem was sending him, and then faithfully set out to improve. ~Ro 8.28-30

His tribulations helped him to achieve character traits and faith that few merit to achieve. 153

“You anyway do ת( )ו5ָּד-ָּדו ה2ת-בhit-bod’dut for a few hours every day, start to dedicate one hour to pray that your wife

should do ב'ה( = teshuvah ת)-ש8וrepentance [!!] “An hour of prayer every day for somebody else will definitely have an effect”

Dt. 4.39 Establish the Word in our

hearts 'ת .ה=ש78ב5 )ו5ם, ו 'ָּד.ְע-ת)' ה.י -י ו' Know today, and ֶא0ל-ל-ב'ב0ְךconsider in your heart Yn 15.7 “If you remain united with me, and my words with you, then ask whatever you want, and it will happen for you.”

)ב'ה teshuvah = repentance ת)-ש8וor heavenly judgments

man ֶאיש

woman ֶא שה

י ה Yah, Adoni, Lord

fire ֶא ש

Heaven in this world: Shmot/Ex 25.8 "They are to make me a sanctuary, so that I may live among them.

-ת)2י -ש8'ָּכ.ִנ )'ש8; ו ) ל2י ֶמ2ק-ָּד -ְע'ש@ו ו)-תו5ָּכ'ם ב

“Among them” or “within them” “HaShem’s greatest joy”…

Peace is the means of blessing. Usually understood as the blessing. T’hillim/Ps 29 5ֶא0ת-ְע.ֶמ)ו - ְך -ב'ר7 -י י י May ADONI bless his ב.ש8)'לו5םpeople with shalom! Only with peace in home is possible Why?

i) Success: physical and spiritualii) Incomeiii) Healthiv) Children’s educationv) Comfort, joy, wisdomvi) Starts with wife: if can live at peace with everyone, but not wife, implies?

Nu 5: If a spirit of jealousy comes over him, and he is jealous of his wife, and she has become impure – or…[if] she has not become impure - he is to bring his wife to the cohen… The cohen will put holy water in a clay pot, and then the cohen will take some of the dust on the floor of the tabernacle and put it in the water…

The cohen will make her swear by saying to her, "If no man has gone to bed with you…then be free from this water of embitterment and cursing. . ." then the cohen is to make the woman swear with an oath that includes a curse; the cohen will say to the woman, “May ADONI make you an object of cursing

and condemnation among your people by making your private parts shrivel and your abdomen swell up! …The cohen is to write these curses [including Tetragrammaton YHVH] on a scroll, wash them off into the water of embitterment.