The Big Top Gear Magasine 178

8/10/2019 The Big Top Gear Magasine 178

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Tell me a better pleasure than having a hot sweaty

Sunday day at croft Circuit PAPERMAIL Finish date: 24rd October 2009


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Issue#187

In this issue we go behind the scenes from Roses to Roses

and Liam gets a pen and paper and draws. Also to top all of

that we have PAPERMAIL..

(The photo above was taken at croft circuit of a random

woman handing out airwaves.)

FEATURES

Touring Cars

Who is the Stig

Concerto (Boat)

Go-cart Challenge

Liams/Harrys Dreams

Motor Carting

CARS

Aston-Martin F1

Attack of the Capri

Vauxhall Astra Life

Audi R8 V10

Roses to Roses

FACES

PAPERMAIL

Harry Pape

Matthew Waters

Perry (Hamster)

REGULARS

News

Best stuff

Top 5 car merchandise


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FORMULA 1

Scion XD

Volkswagen eetle

Jenson

Button


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Supercar of the month:KTM x-bow

Focussed carbon-heavy track car with a turbod

2.0-litres of Audi reliability and superlative looks

(and price tag). Maybe a little soft, but that can be

sorted relatively easily by adjusting the suspen-

sion. Or you could wait for the hotter versions ru-

moured to surface soon.

Looks fast doesn't it? Shame that in this initial

version at least, it isn't really. The 0-60mph time

of 3.9 seconds is obviously impressive, but the

2.0-litre turbo is lifted from the Audi range and is

in a relatively mild state of tune at 240bhp (tuners

have seen a reliable 350). Saying that it's rela-

tively heavy at 790kg, despite all the carbon fibre.

You can have a fibreglass version that costs halfas much too...

Both versions of the car are exceptionally well

made -but the full carbon-tubbed monster is just

breathtaking. It really does feel like your slipping

on a racecar. There's not much in the way of

soft furnishings, so don't worry too much about

whether the switchgear works -there isn't much

of it.

Book of the month:Desert Pursui t Chris Ryan

Definitely one of my all time favourite books. Before you read it

you need to read (Chris Ryan) Survival it introduces all the char-

acters and the story is also good. Alex, Li, Paulo, Hex, Am-

ber, -five kids, each with special skills, have bonded into a

unique team, ready to go anywhere in the world to help others in

need. Undercover, they head for the Sahara desert, resolved to

gather evidence of young landmine victims. But, they are cata-

pulted into a desperate race across the desert, when they discov-

er something even worse -a gang of child-slavers operating in

the area.

Game of the month:Mario Cart Nintendo

Wii.

Mario Kart Wii comes with

the intuitive Wii Wheel,

which makes it easy for

novices to compete

against veterans, so no

one is left in the dust. And with a broadband

hookup to Nintendo Wi-Fi Connection, players

can compete with up to 11 other drivers from

around the world for racing dominance. The

game includes 16 new courses and 16 classic

courses from previous Mario Kart games. For

the first time ever, players have the option of

racing with either karts or motorbikes. Playerscan also hit the road as their personalized Mii

caricatures in addition to the handful of classic

Nintendo characters found in the game.

Reviews by: Amazon, metacritic.com and

the car reviews page on topgear.com.


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1-LandRover S1 mobile phone

2-VDI Driving Simulator

3-Gamester Dual force 2

4-Artistists impression of Beatle

5-Navman S200 Europe

1left

2below

3left

4right

5left


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PAPERMAIL ON: MAKING THIS MAGAZINE

i readers, I hope you

will enjoy this issue of

Top Gear magazine.

Made by the RED

DIMOND team this

magazine was very fun to make.

This Magazine has been dedicated

to Gill the gold fish. My loving pet.

Ive really loved making this maga-

zine . Ive loved designing cars, ap-

plying advertisements and getting

friends to write blogs and help.

I started making this magazine one

week before the summer holiday

2009.

I think one of my favourite bits in this

magazine is actually the boating

holidays at the Norfolk Broads. I

spent a week down there with my

family. And apart from taking photos

and writing a diary I also made a

video. I got to drive more times thanI thought. I actually liked mooring

the boat in and knotting the boat up

to wooden posts more than driving it

in. On Thursday nobody wanted to

drive because it was so hot. Every-

body was on the roof. Apart from my

mum who was forced to drive.

Please dont complain because you

should know that a mans got to do

what a mans got to do, and a wom-

an's got to do what a man cant do.

And in this situation no man in the

world could probably be bothered to

drive a boat for a few hours why the

weather it red hot!!

That was one of the good points

however one of the bad points was

the go cart Vs go-cart. That is be-

cause the day we were planning to

film it was raining heavily so I took it

out of the magazine altogether.

Some times the filming turns out

successful and we can carry on to

are now wondering why the R is in

speech marks is because the letter

R isnt in my name.

When Im older I want to be a maga-

zine journalist or reporter. However,

apparently by the time Im older

enough to get a job there will be no

such thing as newspapers because

if you need news you just go on the

internet or watch your local then

regional news on the TV. Before you

know it every one will be spending

there lives eating junk food and on

the sofa permanently. Like on Wall-

E. I need to be very serious about

our planet because when I used to

go to Cockerton I was in charge of

the Eco-Team. Most of the rubbish

at our school was paper so I got us

some recycling bins that I used to

empty each week. So for those rea-

sons just because we dont need

Magazines or Newspapers any

more in 2020 it sill wont stop me

form making them.

In schools now they actually start to

encoring you at an early age to start

thinking what you want to be when

you are older. Theyve asked me

twice. The first time I said a present-

er for CBBC the second a said a

member of parliament. I could easily

do better than the lying people who

run the country at the moment.

So anyway as my page almost ends

and as I start writing about cars I

would like to thank you for actually

picking this magazine up to read. I

really hope you will enjoy it and de-

spite what critics may tell you this

magazine is great.

Top gear BBC 2 Returning in November

This magazine is dedicated to Gill the Goldfish,

3/8/09 -20/8/09

the next step however sometimes it

turns out a lot like a normal Dell Boy

trick. Unsuccessful and bad. Lately I

actually being watching Only fools

and horses series 6 and 7. I prefer

series 6. Everything in that series

seems a bit more funnier and every-

one is a bit younger. I especially

liked The unlucky winner is I find

it entertaining because Rodney has

to act 14 all week. I think that was

the funniest episode. However all

the episodes were funny in both se-

ries. Ive heard that after

those series it looses it a bit. I be-

lieve the same as Del -he who

dares, wins.

In my media career I think I look at

myself as being a Dell Trotter.

(Apart from Im better looking and

smarter.)

Anyway, I think that my favourite

section is Cars. I think because Ive

limited everything to a page and

everything is so differently beautiful I

love the section.

The features is too long and the

faces section is too much reading.

Anyway, moving away from cars

and this magazine for just a minuet.

The reason my articles are ad-

dressed as PAPERMAIL is be-

cause that is my name. Pape is my

surname and Mail is my first name

backwards. Hi, Im Liam Pape. If you

H

In my media

career I think I

look at myself as

being a Dell

Trotter.


9/68P

AP

ERMA

I


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Drama and Dance Fun and Play

Science


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here was once 3 boys one

called Shut-up one called

Pooh and one called Trouble.

One day they went for a walk

with theyre mum. Suddenly

Pooh fell over and Trouble ran

away. Shut up went to look for

him. He then bumped into a

policeman.

What's your name? Asked

the police man.

Shut-up replied shut up?

What's your name? asked

the police man.

Shut-up replied shut up?

Are you looking for trouble

asked the police man.

Yes, actually replied Shut-up.

Right, wheres you mum. de-

manded the Police man

Picking up pooh exclaimed

Shut-up.

Why did captain Hook cross

the road?

To get to the second hand

shop.

I like my Ford Super duty

because it has a big boot. I

use it to bring the kids home

from school in. Only problem

is when it is raining they get

a bit wet. It is a good car to

get around in. I take it to

work each day, my

wife take the motor bike.

My Ford Super duty is red

and Ive had it 2 years now. I

bought it because I carry

around lots of big stuff and I

go on big holidays with the

other 6 members of my fam-

ily. We need the extra

space. Inside we have a

SAT-NAV which can convert

into a telly vision.

If I had to get another car it

would be a Land roverRange

roverSport with tinted black

windows and Hi-tech comput-

ers inside.

I have a Nintendo DS and a

DSI. I got it out of my birthday

money. My favourite is the DSI

because its new. I need to look

after it more because its new.

Its like the teddies. I look after

Lucy more because she is

more new. My favourite Nin-

tendo game is Mario cart. I likeit because it is racing. I like rac-

ing. The game is easy to con-

trol. I press A and Im off. My

least favourite game is Cars

and I paid 25 for it.

I also have an extremely old

Play-station 1. My favourite

game Fifa 2000. I win a lot onthat game. I won the cup 3

times but usually I play friendly.

Harrys dream for the future. Big family big stuff and a big

car He has also told us about his games consoles

HARRY PAPET

Inside we have

a SAT-NAV

which can con-

vert into a TV.


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or more info go


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he grid

1. Aston-martin DB9

2. Aston-martin DB5

3. Aston-martin DBR9

4. Aston-martin DBS

5. Aston-martin ONE-77

6. Audi R8

7. Richard Hammond

8. Brawn F1

9. Aston-martin Vanquish

S

10. Jenson Buttons Hair

11. Dodge Challenger

12. Lewis Hamilton's crash

helmet

13. Opel -Oliver

14. Aston-martin F1

15. Muscle Cars

16. Top Gear

17.

Renault Clio

18. Morgan

19. Jeremy Clarkson

20. Ferrari CapsCool Cars

The car cool grid and some of Matthews favourite cool cars.

Watch out there are lots of Astons. Its obviously his best

MATTHEW WATERST


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s being a Hamster I

dont see many real cars

or motors. However some-

times Liam has his toy cars

out. (And we will pick that uplater).

Anyway if you did not know I

am a hamster movie star. I

played as the evil villain in

the Playmobiel version of

Roses to Roses. I was the

only living being in the movie

because the rest of the cast

was Playmobiel. My salary

was 5 chocolate buttons per

hour. If it was anymore I

would be fat however luckily

it only took 10 minuets to

film.

I live in a small luxurious

cage (Liam is always telling

me he will get me a bigger

cage but he never does). My

cage is two floors. On the

ground floor there is my bed

and my kitchen. I have a

small igloo shaped thing over

my bed to keep me warm.

On the second floor is where

my food is delivered too and

it is where my living room is.

Even though I only have 2

floors there is nothing

stopping me from climbing on

the roof of my cage, so I do

that most of the times on a

night. Also on a night I like sit-

ting in my living room observ-

ing Liams mum drink her tea

and watch telly. As I look at

her I am begging her to

let me out to play. Some

times she does and we have

fun together other times I

have to entertain myself by

trying to run on the top of my

Hamster wheel or see how

many times I can get around

my cage in one minuet. I am

practising getting one width of

my cage on the roof doing

monkey bars. I cant do it yet.

But apparently it is funny to

watch.

I hate being nocturnal, that

means I am only awake at

night when Liam and Harry

are in bed. I sometimes come

out to play in the daytime be-

cause either Liam or Harry

have decided to wake me up.

Anyway on a serious note, if

you did not know this maga-

zine is dedicated to Gil the

gold fish. His fish bowl/house

used to be on the fire place

and every time I have been

put in a ball I used to go there

first. I was fascinated by him

and how he lived in water.

Liam was about to feed him

one morning when he found

Gil lying silently on his side.

He has been buried in the

front garden with his grave-

stone. May he rest happily.

Above is a photo from the airport scene from the Playmobiel

version of Roses to Roses. Behind the Playmobiel Liam is Peri.

PERRY

A

As I look at her

I am begging

her to let me

out and play.


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WHAT DO YOU GIVE THE CAR

THAT HAS EVERYTHING

A TEST DRIVE

you are, we car.

fiat.co.uk


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Could this car be competing in 2010?


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Would assume it is sponsored by Gulf, Aston martin usually is. I

guessed this from the colour of it: Light blue and Orange.

I think this car is cool so hopefully it has signed up for the 2010 Formula 1. If it

has: bye, bye McLaren, hello team Aston.

So they have a good looking car which is hopefully fast, all they need now is a

good driver (two good drivers actually). I say that they should get some sort ofwinning formula 2 driver to join. Because I think thats how F1 works. Step one:

you are at a Haven holiday park on the motorised go carts and a billionaire spots

you winning you family. He then finds a car for you, finds a sponsor for you, then

singes you up to formula 3. Step two: You start to win the Formula 3 races and at

the end of the season you get a trophies and get promoted to Formula 2. Step three:

Your at the top of your game in Formula 2 now is the time to dump the millionaire

and small sponsor . Find a billionaire and a big sponsor. Finally you get noticed by

Burney Eccleston and your finally in the F1. Now you are in the F1 you are loos-

ing every race going. Your sponsor and billionaire then go bankrupt and you then

get adopted by a big racing team and win the Grand Prix.

(Thats how I think it works anyway.)

I


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At 64.8 inches wide this car can do 0-60 9.8 seconds which is fast if

you live in 1978. With a push this 1978 muscle car can hit an out-

standing 118mph. Also this car has about 125 bhp. This must be my

favourite muscle car ever. The pink one I actually bought on the 20th

of May and is parked in my garage. Now, this is the part where I

write lodes about the car however since it is so old it is hard to re-

trieve information. Apart from my own and the orange one Ive never

seen a Ford Capri on the roads. The Capri is dying out. The only rea-son Ive heard of this car is because my uncle is always talking about

it. Ye good old days when you could not be ripped of by petrol and

when you could drive a sports car without it being smashed and sto-

len. All us, had Ford Capris we did (Only if we were rich that is). So

this is the end of this article because Ive ran out of facts. The End.


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0-60 9.8

Top Speed 118

Length 168.5

Width 64.8

Height 50.7

Wheel

Base

100.8

Under the bonnet in the Ford Capris in the

photos beholds a 3.1 litre V6. Ford didn't

make a diesel version so all the Ford

Capris are petrol.


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VAUXHALL

ASTRA


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HE SEARCH FOR A NEW CARWeve had a Ford Focus CL for three years(ish) now and after two minuets of considering

time in may we decided to get a new car.

The day we decided to make this decision was a day when we were actually going on a

camping holiday. We were all packed and ready to go. My mum was ready in the driving

seat and my brother and I were ready in the back. As my dad shut the garage and stepped

into the passenger seat he notices and inch deep pool of water near his feet. This made abig delay. A short while later we were ready to go again but as we reversed out of our

drive the middle of the car hit a bump. Immediately an orange light came up on the dash

bored. My dad says weve only damaged the sensor. However this was the final stroll be-

cause we knew it would be a lot of money to fix.

One week later when we are back form out holiday my Mum, my Dad and I decide to go

to Sherwood's Vauxhall retailer. We talked to a man in a suit who then introduced us to a

red Vauxhall Astra Club in perfect condition exactly on out 3500 pounds budget. We or-dered a test drive for the next morning at 11:30am.

So the next morning before going to Sherwoods at 10:00am we decided to visit Bristol

Street motors. We looked at lots of cars outside the sales room. 10 minuets later we were

about to head back to the car when a young, blond sales-man came up to us and took us

inside.

One hour later we had all ready got a quote of 1800 pounds for our old Focus and we had

been told about a Vauxhall Astra Life for slightly over our budget. It felt like we were in

the showrooms for hours because the sales-men kept coming and going and coming and

going until finally they persuaded us to put a deposit down for the car.

A week later the Astra Life was parked safely on out drive however we had noticed a few

faults. It had a rip in the drivers seat and one of the doors had a hole in it.

So in conclusion our Top Gear top tip is. When youre buying cars never be alienated into

a car which is dodgy and costs too much.

T


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THIS IS MY MOST FAVOURITE CAR EVER

I loved the old Audi R8 but this one is even better. Jeremy Clarkson wrote about it and said

it was brilliant too This is better than a Porsche and it is the ultimate everyday super

car. Not too expensive too. Only 100,000 pounds (about). That is cheap if you compare it

to a Lamborghini or a Ferrari. I think its only competition is Porsche. When I said this was

the ultimate everyday super car I actually meant the old one was the ultimate every day su-

per car. If you decide to use this for everyday use, by the end of the month youll have no

licence and a billion pound speeding ticked. This car is for the track.

Ive done all this writing Ive forgot about one thingthe coolness and beauty of this thing.

This car has its engine at the back and is the only car which can power slide with 4 wheel

drive, isnt that

cool. And also

just looks at this

car isnt it

uniquely beauti-

ful. This is my

most favourite

car ever made inthe world.


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ince Im the script writer, producer, director and

camera man I have the rights to right about it. I also play as head po-

lice man, Tyler Smith. With my team of April May (Ellen Walker),

Jasper Ravencroft (Matthew Waters), Robert Williams (Reece

Hughes) and Caliph (Sam Boulton) we fight for a right against crim-

inals in our Audi Quattro. On the first episode we chased a Ford Ca-

pri. Of cause the Capri then crashed and we arrested the driver

(eventually). I got inspired for Roses to Roses form Ashes to Ashes.

Basically since Im the Gene Hunt of the team Im always grumpy

and never smile. Also when I made this show I was watching Torch

Wood so Ive tried to base it on that too. So for that reason I think this program is actually better than the

real thing (Ashes to Ashes)

A few of the Episodes are bases on dreams Ive had. The episode where Aprils Dad becomes a Zombie

leader and the series really turned like Torch Wood was a dream had one night however it was more of a

nightmare!! I like doing that because I dont have to do too much thinking for the plot. The hard thing is

remembering the dream. Usually when I wake up in bed I know I have had a dream however I usually

cant remember what they are about. I once herd of the idea type story lines in to one side of the computer

then a script comes out of the other.

I think Ive went a bit off subject but then again thats what writing does -you simply get carried away.

S


27/68

personally think the car is a major part of the series. Both Ashes to Ashes and Roses to

Roses need a cool car. I was watching a documentary on the Audi Quattro lately and the

man said it was the car which would lead us into the 80s. Now my show is set in the 60s

so I have a little fault there. However the show wouldnt be the show it is with out the

Quattro. We would probably be driving about in some sort of World War 2 tank which

would certainly not suit the cool police force.

If you want another tip form me -only get an Audi Quattro if it is in red. Dont fall for

any of this white malarkey. Red is the colour to go for!!

I


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29/68

The week Lewis

burst his tyre he

was driving in his

2010 car. That is

because there

2009 car is pants.

McLaren dont have any

chance of winning this

year, so they are concen-

trating on next year.


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December 2008 Honda had just dropped out of the Formula One and

Jenson Button was left without a racing team. He would have never

thought that he could be winning the Grand Prix and on a podium

every fortnight. Jenson Button now races for Brawn and there has on-

ly been a small number of weeks when he hasnt been first on the grid

or podium. He is the ultimate 2009 driver and there is no way some

one ells can win the Grand Prix. There closest competition is the Red

Bull F1. On average if Brawn has come first, Red Bull has come sec-

ond.


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Ferrari. In 2008 the big

race was Ferrari Vs

McLaren. Ferrari and

McLaren were the two

fastest car on the grid.

However this year now

Brawn GP is here and

Ferrari is classed as slow.Felipe Massa has done

okay this year. However

on Saturday 25th July on

the qualifying day, all the

cars were warming up and

an important part of the

car in font of him let loose

and whammed into Felipe

Massas helmet. He then

crashed and was knocked

uncontious. If it wasnt for

the hi-quality build of the

helmet he would be dead. When Massa crashed the dashboard

in his car was lit up with warning lights. We only found out that

an important part fell of the car in front from the interview after-

wards. Massa apparently has permanent eye problems now so

chances are Felipe Massa wont be able to raceagain. Ferrari have got Michel Schumacher to com-

plete races till the end of the season.

Please do not try and watch a video of the crash on

the internet because all videos have been removed

due to distressing pitchers.


32/68

EAT HEALTHY

Eat Well

Move More

Live Longer


33/68


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35/68

CAPTAINS LOG: DAY 1

After registering in and un packing my family and I set off in the boat. 3:30PM. All of

my family have been taking turns to drive. With our faithful Concerto 2 we got all

the way from Stalham past the first bridge and moored up, all on the first day. Just

before the bridge there were some places to moor up however since my dad was

driving he did a 360 turn twice. So we had to move on.

In 2008 my dad was working down in Norfolk, he was working in Bacton. On the way

to the Broads we called there. However there was a massive Paige of Ladybirds.

When you live in northern England like me you rarely see Ladybirds. That is a good

thing too. They crawled all over us, they were on the floor, on the walks, in the air.

There were millions of them. When we quickly decided to get back into the car since

they were on us, we spent the next 10 minuets in the car squishing, flicking, scream-

ing and splattering. That is probably one of the worse experiences of my life.

Anyway when we were moored up we had to pay 4 pounds to this farmer who came

along with a plastic bag loaded with dosh.

As the sky's turned dark and the heavens opened my dad set up his fishing rod in the

well under his umbrella. The rain water form the top of the umbrella was pouring in-

to the boat so my dad was forced to fish out of a window. Suddenly his rod started to

jerk. Then my dad struck and lifted up a live Eel. As my family and I screamed and

shouted my dad was trying to cut his wire. However the Eel was jerking around too

much. All of a sudden he cut it. The Eel fell onto the side of the boat and hopped away

from the window. Dad swung straight into action, as soon as he had neatly put his

rod away. By the time he had his net ready the Eel was out of reach. Then unfortu-

nately the Eel stopped moving and my dad was able to knock it over board. Dad

quotes Eels. Dirty horrible things. They are like the snake of the water. This shall

be an interesting story to tell our other friends and relatives.


36/68

CAPTAINS LOG: DAY 2

After an okay nights sleep we were all up by twenty to seven. After breakfast

dad, Harry and I decided to do some fishing. In that hour we only caught one

fish but that set us up for the day. Today we were heading for Wroxham. Before

we got there we came to a nature reserve. As soon as we were moored up we

went into the nature reserve. It was a short walk. When we came back to the

boat we got the fishing rods out and did some fishing. We only did it for forty

minuets however we caught 7 fish.

As we then proudly drove into Wroxham we didn't find anywhere to moor up

before the bridge. We didn't want to go under the bridge because it would cost

twelve pounds. As we started to come back we decided to have a look in a mas-

sive lagoon. We soon decided to come back out due to sailing boat races and

events. We then found a nice place to moor up under a 4mph singe.

We were now all calming down to have our Barbeque. It was very hot so it was

hard to think what we were going to do next. After a while we diced to head

back into Wroxham. This time, however, we immediately found a place to

moor up.

We then decided to have a look around the town of Wroxham. We then noticed

something quite interesting. All the shops were sponsored by Roys. There

was Roys D.I.Y, Roys supermarket, Roys Toys. I even saw a bin sponsored by

Roys. We also had a look at Wroxham Bridge which was really quite small. All

the way through this Harry was in a right mood with himself thats why he was

sent straight to bed when we got back to the boat why Dad and I fished. My

Mam was reading her book what she had finally got into. Suddenly Dad caught

a fish. I enjoyed today and I think it is a good day to lead us into our Holiday


37/68

CAPTAINS LOG: DAY 3

Early this morning (1:00am) Harry was sick. We think this is because of the

Chocolate fudge cake and Rich chocolate souse which we had had for break-

fast the previous evening. Luckily that night I had decided to sleep on the sofa.

Harry snores a lot and our room is small and stuffy.

Also early this morning Dad was fishing with Sausages and burgers as bait.

(He didn't catch anything).

Also, some exiting news, we took over our first boat today. It was me who did

it. My brother then followed in my footsteps as he took over a boat afterwards.

We were at Horning this morning where a junior sailing club was taking place.

We had to keep right at the side of the river. We had passes Horning the previ-

ous day to get to Wroxham.

The long drive form Horning to Acle was certainly an enjoyable one. Every one

had a go driving and my dad was pike fishing why we were moving. He had a

ten pound line and some extra sausages as bait.

As we approached Acle the water got tidal. I was sitting at the back of the boat

writing, my mum had to come and get me because it was so windy.

At Acle it was lovely. The sunset reflected don the water. There were ducks and

swans everywhere when we moored up. One swan even attempted to eat my

mums toes. My dad and Harry had a good hours fishing. My dad even carried

on for and extra forty minuets when Harry went inside. He was using maggots

as bait. Altogether today they caught 5 fish.

We went out for tea at a big pub and we burned off some energy at the play area.


38/68

CAPTAINS LOG: DAY 4/5

Today we set sail for Great Yarmouth. Within two and a half hours we were there. It

was forecasted for heavy rain today however it was hot and sticky. The water was

like driving along the rapids.

This morning we all woke up early on a very bumpy tide. The previous night we had

came back from the pub and had to jump onto the roof of our boat due to low tide. All

night you could hear the water splashing about as we rocked from side to side. When

we were up we had breakfast got some water then set off. We had agreed Great Yar-

mouth was like a smaller version of Blackpool. One thing we found weird was that

there were major companies in the middle of council estates.

Anyway at 10:30AM we stopped off at a windmill. There was a farm around it. After

that we then headed back to the boat and set off again. We were now heading back

since it was midweek. After more than one hours driving and lunch we stopped

again near a T junction.

By the end of the day we were at South Walsham. There were only two pubs there so

we had a drink at one called The Ship however by looking at the price list we agreed

that is was way too expensive so we did a runner.

The next pub was more of a Chinese, restraint, take away sort of place. The staff

there were two Chinese ladies who were a bit slow understanding our order but after

a while we had ordered drinks and our meal. Dad ordered curry. Unfortunately that

set him off. As he swiftly ran back to our smelly chemical toilet, with his bum tightly

squeezed together the rest of us laughed. We werent laughing when we had to get a

shower in the same room.

Another problem accrued that night under the name of: Mosquito. When we went to

bed there was Mosquitos everywhere so I moved back into Harry's room.


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What do you think of the Holliday so far?Mam: Brilliant, excellent, tranquillity.

Dad: Me, as you say: I dont like it - I love it! There is something

for everyone to do. Excellent.

Harry: I like it because Mam and Dad have let us drive the boat. I

like hanging around the boat. Fan-dabby-dosey.

Liam: I think the holiday all together was great. However Im

shattered due to late nights and early mornings.

You werent that keen sleeping on water. How has it been?

Mam: Absolutely fine. No problems at all. Ive probally slept bet-

ter than I would sleep at home. And if the boat dose rock it is like

being rocked to sleep.

So, Harry youve just

caught the biggest

Bream. How did it hap-

pen?

Harry: I put my rod in

with some

luncheon meat

on (well my dad

did). I saw my

rod shivering so

I pulled it outand there it

was.

I

QUOTE

When

the boat

is rock-

ing,

dont

come

knock-

ing.

Its like

fishing

in the

bathtub!!

Quotes

of the

week


40/68

CAPTAINS LOG: DAY 6

I woke up in Harry's room this morning wondering where I was. Then I remembered. I went into

the living room and turned on the telly, GMTV was on. I watched it as I made breakfast and as my

Mam got up. At this point in time my Dad was boasting and showing us a video of a massive fish

he had caught early morning fishing. The camera never lies quotes my Dad.

At half past eight we set off to Potterhinem. At half past ten we stopped, went out and stretched

our legs. Twenty minuets later we set of again. One hour later I got the day-jar-vu feeling as we

passed St.Bennets abbey which my Mam and I visited the previous day.

Anyway if you are interested in the weather apart from Saturday night when dad caught an Eel

and it was dark and heavy rain, every other day has been scorching hot. Also crash-wise, there

had been a few close shaves where either Harry or I have got close to the sand banks and reeds.

Also on Sunday under that 4mph singe near Wroxham we hit a small sand bank. (Nothing that our

dad couldnt get us out of.) He used a long yellow pole with a hook in the end and pushed it out,

having to jump on afterwards. But apart from that weve been crash free.

We kept driving till we got to Potterhinem. The temperature felt like it was 100 C. My mum drove

us there. We went for a walk through the small town. We got some sosage rolls and other stuff for

dinner. By lunch time everybody was swetting. Our chocklate cake for desert had melted so we

had to break into our emergency supply. After lunch Dad and Harry would have fished but they

werent permitted. So we spent most of the afternoon playing on game boys and getting a nice

tan. You could tell Dad hadnt put sun cream on. He said hes like bacon. Turns red when its

cooked nicely.

After a while I wanted to visit a cheap tat shop and everybody els wanted an ice cream so we

walked back into Potterhinem. We had a look for some pubs and we got a Magnum. The tepriture

was still hot but not as hot. We came back and watched the Simpsons then the redgenal news.

Earlier on I said Harry and Dad couldnt go fishing however they saw other people doing it so

they joined in.

As the sky darkened, we went out for some grub. We went inside this huge empty pub called The

sailors Tavern. We enjoyed our meal there and after desert we had a game of pool. We walked

back latwe when it was pich black.


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CAPTAINS LOG: DAY 7

Surprisingly this morning I was the first one up. I set up the telly and watched GMTV as

my Mam and Dad got up. I had breakfast.

At 9:00AM we set off for some water - I was driving. We had to do a U turn to get out. The

front was going well. BANG The back end hit our next door neighbours boat. Oops. I

then drove us up river to Potterhinem bridge where Harry and Mam jumped off and

my Dad and I were left to fill our Concerto up with water.

We then all got back onto the boat and set off back along river. One hour later we

stopped and fished for 20 minuets. Like fishing in the bath tub quotes my Dad. So we

set off again looking for somewhere ells to fish. We found some where so once again

we fished. We were about to leave again when suddenly my Dad saw his rod twitching,

he striked Damn As Dad lifted his rod he reviled a huge Eel. My Mum, Harry and I

laughed as my Dad cut his line. The next time we stooped it was a Ludham Bridge

where we moored up. This is where we were on the first night, by the way. We had

lunch there then set off again. When we reached Breydon Water we turned right and

immediately hit a 3MPH zone. It took us 10 minuets to get through and when we got to

the end it was a dead end so I had to perform an excellent 3 point turn (although I did

it with 5 points). We then moored up a small place called Naitshead. Note to self:

Good place to moor up for night. WARNING: not very big.

After staying there for an hour and a half we decided to do the final stretch of the jour-

ney back to Stalham. Well those plans soon changed when we started heading for Sut-

ton. Well we thought we were heading for there but we were actually heading for Stal-

ham. (The sighs were really confusing.) We finally reached the boats home at the time

of half past 4 so we did some activities. Such as: trying to tune the telly in, fishing,

playing on game boys and playing football.

So in conclusion, Id definitely go again


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IN CONCLUSION TO THE FISHING PART OF

THE HOLLIDAY ALL TOGEATHER 35 FISH

HAVE BEEN COUGHT 4 WHICH WERE EELS

THE FISHING WAS GOOD BECAUSE IT KEPT

HARRY AND DAD BUSY FOR HOURS ON END

IT IS ALSO EXITING WHEN THEY CATCH

SOMETHING


43/68

Top 5 things:

Going out for tea ach night.

First coming on our boat.

Looking around Wroxham.

Harry catching biggest fish.

Dad fouling after catching Eel.

CAPTAINS LOG:

Best Bits

Best 5 places to moor up:

Wroxham

Great Yarmouth

Stalham

Ludham bridge

Horning


44/68

At the Bridge Inn there were some mini quad bikes that chil-dren could race on. First Harry and I went on one together

then we raced separately. 3...2...1...Go!! Harry immediately

stalled and I got a good start. I lapped him but as soon as I

did that his pit stop team came up and helped him reset his

engine by this time I was directly behind Harry. Since both

carts went the same speed it was hard to over take him. He

made it harder by knocking into me every time we got side

by side. It didn't matter that much because I was one lap in

front. I then won.

At great Yarmouth when we were finally ready to look

around the pleasure beach it seemed all the rides were mo-

tor related. There were Dodgems, go carts, quad bikes, merigo rounds, 2 wheel racing, lean scooters and

those babyish safari carts.

We only went on a few and one of those were the go-carts. My Mum was taking photos (not very well),

as my Dad, Harry and I raced. As soon as the guy working there pressed the On button all the go-carts

went speeding around why mine just stopped and broke down. The man gave me a push. As soon as he

let go my cart started going backwards. As my Dad and Harry lapped me they gave me a friendly wham in

the back as they went into the back of me. The go-carts then stopped as I climbed out and received my

refund.


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Anyway, back over to Harry and Dad All the carts go at the same speed so it is all about the diversstyle, technique and weight. All the way though the race Harry just had the edge. So as the checker flag

waved Harry could proudly say he had won. On my go I also came first so me and Harry decided to race

again.

Power up - and we were off. We did a few boring laps where nothing happened until: oh, no. Harry had

just taken a corner too close and crashed. I then lapped him and won.

As soon as we were off the carts Damen Hills father came to congratulate Harry on his beating of our

Dad and his loss against me.

Earlier on we were on the Dodgems. I was on one with my Mum and Harry was on one with our Dad.

Our parents were navigating however Mam spent most of the time screaming and Dads spent most of the

time telling Harry to wham in to us.

After that we had a look in an indoor carting centre. You had to be over 8 years old to have a go and you

had to wear a crash helmet and a fire proof suit. When you sit in the carts you are close to the ground.

However my Mam and Dad decided it was too quick. Dad quotes: Liam would have broke every bone in

his body and Harry would be upside down on fire.


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Our boat is long and wide. It includes a TV, CD,

DVD, some normal plugs and a very homey

feeling inside. My mum is wondering if it is too

small. Our boat is called Concerto 2 and it is

yellow and light blue.

The maximum, legal, advised speed is 6mphhowever at full pellet it can go at 7.33mph. On

our boat the speed is measured in revs.

On the dash board it tells you the engine heat,

the oil pressure and the voltage. It includes an

emergency stop button which stalls the engine.

The dash board also includes lots of warning

lights and messages. Finally the boat includes a

few knobs which manage the water pump, theheater and stuff like that. (And of cause there is

a horn and a steering weal.)


47/68

www.vvrosettes.co.uk

TEL: 01325 720846

FAX: 01325 722720

MOB: 07774 8003234


48/68

As my Dad, my Grandad and I entered croft

circuit we were immediately met by hot

weather and the smell of petrol. 1st we

came to the safety cars a Genetta and a

Porsche (Right). We walked past hundredsof cars, shops and garages. The Vauxhall

garage all ways has something spectacu-

lar, this year they had a miniature croft cir-

cuit and people could drive remote-control

cars around it. They also had a 190.2 inch-

es long Vauxhall Insignia. (Right) It was top

of the range and very long. Also as we

passes garages there were cars preparing

for the race. (Right) There werent only

Clios there were Porsches and Genetta

and Formula 2 cars. Not all the cars we saw

would be racing. But the cars which were-

nt racing either looks weird or were cus-tomised. Such as this Lamborghini on your

right. On the photo it seems there werent

many people crowding it however behind

me were hundreds of people. This was the

only Lamborghini there but

it was probably the best car

there. On the Left is a Cit-

ron which was also there.


49/68

There were also some less unique cars there

such as the Audi TT which I dont necessarily

like. Its probably the only Audi which I dont

like. I find it too clean and nice. I would advise

you to save the money and get a Nissan 350Z.(Ive went a bit of subject haven't I.) Another

car I dont like is Porsches there were mil-

lions of them racing however there were also

millions whom people owned. There was a

Porsche coffee room and look at all the Por-

sches parked outside!!

There was also a tent owned by croft and it

had some cars in there. Im not actually that

sure why they were there. Maybe you can test

drive them around the track. I have a photo of

2 of them (both on your left) and one thing

they have in common is that they have no roof.

I wouldnt like to test drive them on a rainy

day!!

And finally to finish of this article here are

some images of cars you may see later on be-

cause theses cars are in there garages ready

to race.

Words and Photos

Liam Pape


50/68

Most of the photos youll see over the

next few pages will be from the same

angle. The corner you will see photos

of if Complex just before the finish line

(Right). Where we were sitting was on a

bank and the only cars we could see

were the cars which were at the back of

the starting grid and the ones going

around our corner. The cars all ways

seemed to come in groups. So the first

group would be the racers from 1st-5th

then the rest would come round the cor-ners in 2s. All apart from the car whom

is coming stone dead last.

I soon got bored of watching cars going

round one single corner and attempting

to get a good photo, so I decided to go

for a walk with my dad and look at thecamera angle I got. It is on your right

and the car is in the top left hand corner


51/68

...of it. The rest of the photo includes a

fence and some barbed wire and some

grass with buttercups.

And another strange camera angle I got

was only get the back of the car. Asdemonstrated.

In this magazine youll only see about 50

photos of about 150. The other 100

were just the track because the cars go

so fast. I would have some photos of the

Formula 2 but those cars really did gofast.

Anyway I dont know who won but one

thing I do know is that the cars make

beautiful noises if you walk past the pits

and cars can wear tattoo's and makeup

too. By tattoos I mean sponsors and

those things you pit on your back win-

dow saying Middlesbrough FC. Personal-

ly if I became a touring car driver Id

have the sponsors however I wouldnt

have the back window thing (I dont like

football anyway.) These car tattoos you

see on the motor way, not just Middles-brough. Ive seen a Newcastle one and a

Man United one.

Back to touring cars I dont know who

won but I found it fasernating watching

the crashes and smashes and the way

they open there door when theyre fin-ished to let some air in since it is hot.


52/68

I think this race was my favourite for a

few reasons. 1-you can tell the cars

apart because of all the completely

different colouring. 2-since some driv-

ers are fast and some were slow there

was never a moment where we could-

nt see a car. 3-there were so many

crashes. I remember none of the cars

decided to cut half of the track and go

across the crass. He didn't travel as

fast as he wanted too along the grass

and soon spun around.

From where we were sitting this race

wasnt as loud as youd expect it to be

this race. I think it was the quietest

race of the day. There were the odd oc-

casional sounds such as the tyre

squeal at the beginning and the power

sliding around corners. But that was it.I dont know if that takes the excite-

ment out of it for the driver but at least


53/68

now he an hear himself think.

If I had to be in a race and since this

race was my favourite, Id be in this one.

I find the touring car race too big head-

ed and I find the Genetta too sweaty andhot even watching. However the Porsche

can break sweat but not much and when

it gets hot it can put on the 3,000 pound

air-conditioning system which was taken

out before the race. (The way Im taking

here is just as like Im imagining it. The

air-conditioning gets taken out before

the race to save weight.)

Porsche to the Max


54/68

Here is another big race. On youre

left hand side you can see three

photos, look at the car on the left

of them. Going, going, gone. Yes it

is a Genetta crashing into some

tyres and a camera man missing it

all. (You see, doesn't that prove

how my photography skills with a

Kodak camera are better than an

adult with a fully hi-tech camera.

Im so prowed.)

Out of the three races I think eve-

ryone found the Genetta one more

serious. On the Porsches the driv-

ers were playing in this one they

were fighting. There were probably

more deaths, bloods spills and in-

juries than any other race. (Whichto be honest with you I find quite

entertaining.


55/68

If I was locked in a garage with this I

would be terrified due to the way the

lights are shaped. They are like scary

human eyes and that grill like thing un-

der the lights acts like a big scary mouthabout to at up every car in front of him.

Also on every photograph there seems

to be photographer taking photos of

everything but cars look at him on this

photo, there are 3 really good cars he

can get a shot of and he is pointing the

wrong way. I could probably get a better

shot of the Genetteas than him even if I

was standing on a tram is Blackpool!!

So, in conclusion to the blind camera

man, if you are the chief editor

and boss off a newspaper and

you need a new photographerget a anyone but him to do it.

Now, you dont see many Ge-

nettea's before this I didn't know

about them. You dont see many

reviews on them or any speech-

es on Top gear. It also had aweird name. Genetta. What sort

of car designer would call their

car Genetta. (Well Mr. Tom Ge-

netta of course.)

So in conclusion to the car, if

you want a big scary car whichno one has heard of - buy a Ge-

netta!!


56/68


57/68

If you are a bit slow and haven't seen Top gear since September and you haven't looked at

a newspaper or magazine since April you may want to read this article to find out who the

Stig is. However if you are the biggest Top gear fanatic in the world and you buy every

newspaper in the world you also may still want to read this article for two reasons. 1-to

add it to your vast collection of old papers and magazines. 2-to find out who the old black

Stig was and why Top gear killed him off.

Right, for a starter on the first episode of Top gear 2009 this Stig came into the studio and

revealed his face. It was old F1 champion Michael Schumacher. The Clarkson gave him a

funny interview.

Now that was a while back and that news has past. However some interestingly old how-

ever secret news is included in this part of the article. So if you have watched Top gear for

years you will know that the old, black Stig flew of an aircraft carrier and lost his hand. He

was never seen again. However that was only a cover up story. The real reason the black

Stig was never seen again is because the man who was

playing as the Stig wrote in his auto biography that he was

the Stig. The racing drivers name is Perry McCarthy. (Left)

Who was the Stig was the 9th wonder of the world. (The

8th wonder was King Kong.) However now every one

knows who the Stig is. There are a few people who believe

Michel Schumacher isnt the Stig. They believe Michel

Schumacher said he wanted to be on Top Gear so they

dressed him up as the Stig then stuck him in the Top Gear

studio why they were broadcasting. If you noticed Jeremy

Clarkson mentioned a bit about him being the Stig howev-

er then he started to talk about Ferrari and Bacardi and

Stuff. Now Im really confused who to believe.

The conspiracy or the Clarkson?


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62/68

The summer holidaysnot as hot as expected but still no school. Mid holiday, my mum took Har-

ry and I motor carting at Carting for Kids. Immediately Harry saw the speed of the carts and

dropped out. That meant I had goes. The man quotes its all about going there and having a

good time. So after I was in my crash helmet and in my safety suit with gloves. They gave me

a safety talk (other page) I was ready to go. The man showed me around for the first lap. Sud-

denly he let me take over him. I was on my own now in the part of the track I did not know. After I

had done a few laps I had realised where the hard corner was and as I approached it at my top

speed I didnt brake soon enough and I did a 360 onto the grass. As I waited with my hands inthe air until one of the staff helped and get me off. I then raced off again. As the chequered flag

waved a did my lap of glory and pulled into the pits. I was so ready for my second go!!


63/68

Were just a few of

the quotes I shout-

ed when I was ei-

ther going at full

pellet or takingover somebody.

THE SAFETY RULES: 1. right foot is to accelerate and left foot to

brake. dont have two peddles down at the same time. One of the other. 2.

when you go past the viewing aria dont wave to anyone. you need to be

concentrating all the time. Do not look behind. 3. it is not a race. you go at

your own pace. if you want to take over someone because they are going

slow, please do. however if you are too slow people will take over you. 4. ifyou crash and go onto the grass do not get out of the car. raise your hand

and one of us will help you get back off. 5. when you see the chequered flag

gets waved you can do one lap then you have to pull into the pits where you

shall be guided into a parking space. 6. if you see one of the racing staff

pushing there hands down it means slow down. 7. do not take your helmet

off under any circumstances. 8. enjoy


64/68

Founded in Faith: Learning, Caring and Growing Together

Drama and Dance

R.E. and Jesus

Geography and Recycling

English and Maths

Fun and Play

Performing


65/68

CREWOverall boss: Liam Pape

Editor: Lynne Pape

Writers: Sam Boulton

Liam Pape

Matthew Waters

Harry Pape

(Roxanne Spence)

Special Advertisement thanks to:

Alec Llewyn

Vicky Pape

Laura Snowdon

Special thanks to: RED DIMOND

Top Gear Magazine

Images/ Photos/ Pitchers: Google images

Liam Pape

Harry Pape

Erica Dodd

Studospooks.tv

Google Images

Lynne Pape

This magazine is dedicate to Gill (gold fish).

2 August 200820 August 2009


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68/68

LEADERS GADG

ET MAKING

EXCELENT

SCOUTS GADGET

MAKING OKAY

Graham and Mark Vs Robin, Matthew, Liam and David. Gadget making for

youre kitchens is a great task for everyone. Billy holder, towel rack,

washing rack or table its our choice.

The Scouts decided to split up and multitask. All together at the end

they had achieved to make a billy rack, a table, an oven, a frying pan

rack, a tea towel holder and a washing line.

However in the other kitchen they had only achieved to make 5 things in

4 days, we made all of our stuff in one day. However those 4 things

were excellent. They made a joint washing up bowl rack and table, a

drying rack, a billy rack, a tall frying pan rack. and another table.

In conclusion 2 scout leaders are as good as 4 small scouts.

Scout and Senior Hike

On the week camp there tend to be 2 hikes, one for the scouts and one

for the seniors. On Monday the Seniors went one their hike plus 2

scouts. Ben and Roxy. On their walk they saw some amazing creatures and

things which they saw were Geese, a snake which one leader (Kelly) de-

cided to explain it to the rest of the camp and came out with an amaz-ing explanation of the snake. (By the way, it was a baby snake no mat-

ter what she says.) Everyone who went on that hike enjoyed it really

well.

On the Thursday of the camp, the scouts went on their

The Big Top Gear Magasine 178

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