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Sociology 1201 Sociology 1201 Halving it All: “How I Did Halving it All: “How I Did My Study” My Study” Recruited 429 couples by a letter to Recruited 429 couples by a letter to dual earner couples at daycares and dual earner couples at daycares and schools in New England schools in New England Word of mouth and snowball sampling Word of mouth and snowball sampling Random sampling using a local Random sampling using a local telephone directory telephone directory Result was 429 couples, each partner Result was 429 couples, each partner working at least 20 hrs a week and working at least 20 hrs a week and with at least one child under 18 with at least one child under 18
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Sociology 1201 Halving it All: “How I Did My Study” Recruited 429 couples by a letter to dual earner couples at daycares and schools in New England

Dec 24, 2015

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Page 1: Sociology 1201 Halving it All: “How I Did My Study”  Recruited 429 couples by a letter to dual earner couples at daycares and schools in New England

Sociology 1201Sociology 1201

Halving it All: “How I Did My Halving it All: “How I Did My Study”Study”

Recruited 429 couples by a letter to dual Recruited 429 couples by a letter to dual earner couples at daycares and schools in earner couples at daycares and schools in New EnglandNew England

Word of mouth and snowball samplingWord of mouth and snowball sampling Random sampling using a local telephone Random sampling using a local telephone

directorydirectory Result was 429 couples, each partner Result was 429 couples, each partner

working at least 20 hrs a week and with at working at least 20 hrs a week and with at least one child under 18least one child under 18

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Characteristics of sampleCharacteristics of sample

96% white96% white Religiously diverseReligiously diverse Averaged 2 childrenAveraged 2 children Average age of children: 5 and 8Average age of children: 5 and 8 Over-represent upper middle classOver-represent upper middle class

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Initial telephone interviewsInitial telephone interviews

Asked to interview each partner out Asked to interview each partner out of hearing of the otherof hearing of the other

15 minute interviews, asking about 15 minute interviews, asking about percentage of childcare by each, percentage of childcare by each, along with demographic questionsalong with demographic questions

Key question: “Considering Key question: “Considering everything that goes into parenting everything that goes into parenting in a typical week, what % do you do in a typical week, what % do you do and what % does your spouse do.”and what % does your spouse do.”

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Face-to-face interviewsFace-to-face interviews

Used the telephone interviews to Used the telephone interviews to choose 30 couples in each of five choose 30 couples in each of five groups for face-to-face interviewsgroups for face-to-face interviews– Equal sharersEqual sharers– Potential equal sharers (at least one Potential equal sharers (at least one

spouse reported husband doing 50%+)spouse reported husband doing 50%+)– 60-40 couples60-40 couples– 75-25 couples75-25 couples– Alternating shift couplesAlternating shift couples

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Face-to-face interviews IIFace-to-face interviews II

Most participants interviewed at Most participants interviewed at homehome

All interviewed by DeutschAll interviewed by Deutsch Interviews from 1-4 hours, averaging Interviews from 1-4 hours, averaging

2 hours2 hours Questions listed beginning p. 243Questions listed beginning p. 243

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Equally shared parentingEqually shared parenting

Many studies documenting that Many studies documenting that women, in the U.S. and in the world, women, in the U.S. and in the world, do more than half of the parenting, do more than half of the parenting, even if: even if: – They say they believe in equal sharingThey say they believe in equal sharing

E.g. Hochschild, E.g. Hochschild, Second ShiftSecond Shift

– They work comparable hoursThey work comparable hours– They make comparable incomesThey make comparable incomes

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My partner and IMy partner and I

Intention to share equallyIntention to share equally First year after son’s birth:First year after son’s birth:

Deutsch: “No matter how intensely you love Deutsch: “No matter how intensely you love them, caring for small children full time is them, caring for small children full time is incredibly hard work, much of it stressful, incredibly hard work, much of it stressful, boring, and isolating.” boring, and isolating.”

By second year and move to Duluth:By second year and move to Duluth:– Dad teaching and Mom in nursing school Dad teaching and Mom in nursing school – ““Momdad”Momdad”

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Creating Equality at HomeCreating Equality at Home

Deutsch: “As all parents do, they muddled Deutsch: “As all parents do, they muddled through, adjusting as they go. Parenthood … through, adjusting as they go. Parenthood … has the capacity to change people’s deeply has the capacity to change people’s deeply held beliefs, relation to work, relationships held beliefs, relation to work, relationships with other people, and even one’s identity. with other people, and even one’s identity. The magnitude of the changes parenthood The magnitude of the changes parenthood entails almost always comes as a shock to entails almost always comes as a shock to new parents.” new parents.”

““I had a complete mental image of I had a complete mental image of parenthood that didn’t last twenty-four parenthood that didn’t last twenty-four hours after Noah came home.” Danielhours after Noah came home.” Daniel

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Creating Equality at HomeCreating Equality at Home

Many did not begin equalMany did not begin equal Conflict/compromiseConflict/compromise

: e.g., Daniel and Janet—p. 22: e.g., Daniel and Janet—p. 22 Kevin and Donna—the tasks chartKevin and Donna—the tasks chart

Often still involved specialization… Often still involved specialization… “ “Mary is more involved in their emotional lives” Mary is more involved in their emotional lives” ““He(Kevin) is one of the few who truly share the He(Kevin) is one of the few who truly share the

mental work of parenting.”mental work of parenting.” Often the woman has the “higher standard” of what Often the woman has the “higher standard” of what

constitutes good parenting (Dan and Kaelene)constitutes good parenting (Dan and Kaelene)

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Creating Inequality at HomeCreating Inequality at Home

– Helpers: “Eric will do stuff, but he wants Helpers: “Eric will do stuff, but he wants to be asked.” Deniseto be asked.” Denise

– Sharers: the men do more paid work but Sharers: the men do more paid work but “when they are available, they are every “when they are available, they are every bit as involved as their wives.”bit as involved as their wives.”

– Slackers: “the men who relax while their Slackers: “the men who relax while their wives do the second shift”… see p. 46wives do the second shift”… see p. 46

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Creating Inequality at homeCreating Inequality at home

Denise and EricDenise and Eric Denise: “I have greater needs as a nurturer.”Denise: “I have greater needs as a nurturer.” Eric: “I’m either more selfish or I just don’t have the Eric: “I’m either more selfish or I just don’t have the

patience.” needs to nurture; Eric has more ambition.patience.” needs to nurture; Eric has more ambition.

Ethan and Peg:Ethan and Peg: Ethan: “I don’t have the opportunity or the desire… If Ethan: “I don’t have the opportunity or the desire… If

I come home from work at six-thirty, seven, I’m tired, I come home from work at six-thirty, seven, I’m tired, basically fatigued.”basically fatigued.”

Peg: “Sometimes I feel like I have no time for myself Peg: “Sometimes I feel like I have no time for myself ever… There are days when I feel like I’m just going ever… There are days when I feel like I’m just going crazy.”crazy.”

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Creating Inequality at homeCreating Inequality at home

Family myths?Family myths?Denise promotes the myth that Eric is the Denise promotes the myth that Eric is the

one with ambition (although she’s the one one with ambition (although she’s the one who went to graduate school)who went to graduate school)

Hochschild and symbolic interaction. The Hochschild and symbolic interaction. The need to justify inequality if you’re going to need to justify inequality if you’re going to accept it. accept it.

Deutsch:Deutsch:““Notably absent from any of these Notably absent from any of these

explanations… is any mention of male power explanations… is any mention of male power in resisting the work at home.”in resisting the work at home.”

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Fighting for equalityFighting for equality

Dorothy: “I actually went on strike a Dorothy: “I actually went on strike a few times.”few times.”

Roberta: “That is when we entered Roberta: “That is when we entered into our hard negotiations… I think I into our hard negotiations… I think I sort of learned to talk back—to sort sort of learned to talk back—to sort of stand up for myself.” of stand up for myself.”

Rita: “Of course we are always Rita: “Of course we are always arguing about which way it’s tilted.” arguing about which way it’s tilted.”

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Fighting against equalityFighting against equality

A husband: “She probably won’t sit A husband: “She probably won’t sit still on a Sunday… She’s not happy still on a Sunday… She’s not happy unless she’s doing something. I’m unless she’s doing something. I’m different. I can relax.” different. I can relax.”

““Carol works 52 hours a week and also does Carol works 52 hours a week and also does virtually all the housework. When I asked virtually all the housework. When I asked how her husband responded to her desire how her husband responded to her desire for him to do more he said: “I just chuckle.”for him to do more he said: “I just chuckle.”

……she seems resigned, perhaps because his she seems resigned, perhaps because his behavior seems so normal…. “I see it in a lot behavior seems so normal…. “I see it in a lot of the guys.” of the guys.”

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Relationships and powerRelationships and power

Class: what creates power in an Class: what creates power in an intimate relationship?intimate relationship?

Emerson: power/dependence theoryEmerson: power/dependence theory Hochschild, Hochschild, Second ShiftSecond Shift, Peter and , Peter and

Nina: “the economy of gratitude”Nina: “the economy of gratitude”

““I just kind of do it. He helps much I just kind of do it. He helps much more than a lot of fathers help.” more than a lot of fathers help.”

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Strategies of Resistance to equalityStrategies of Resistance to equality

““The raw spoken claim of male privilege The raw spoken claim of male privilege seems to have become taboo.”seems to have become taboo.”

No initiativeNo initiative: “I’ll do anything you want… : “I’ll do anything you want… just tell me what.”just tell me what.”

““I have to direct him and it’s just easier for I have to direct him and it’s just easier for me to do it.” me to do it.”

Passive resistancePassive resistance: “the kids could be : “the kids could be yelling and screaming. He’s just oblivious.”yelling and screaming. He’s just oblivious.”

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Strategies IIStrategies II

Incompetence: Incompetence: “I wasn’t as good as “I wasn’t as good as Roz. Roz’s just good.” Many of the Roz. Roz’s just good.” Many of the women learn these skills after they women learn these skills after they are married and the men could too. are married and the men could too.

Praise: “Praise: “She’s wonderful as a She’s wonderful as a mother.mother. I feel lucky to have her as a I feel lucky to have her as a partner because it takes a lot of the partner because it takes a lot of the burden off me.”burden off me.”

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Strategies IIIStrategies III Different standardsDifferent standards: Women often care : Women often care

more about keeping the house neat. Why? more about keeping the house neat. Why? S.M. MillerS.M. Miller

Deutsch: “The problem of what the Deutsch: “The problem of what the children need is a more troubling one”children need is a more troubling one”

Denial: Denial: the husband who says he does the husband who says he does 35% (she says 25%) and thinks he’s great, 35% (she says 25%) and thinks he’s great, probably compared to his fatherprobably compared to his father

D: “D: “The myth implicitly promulgated by The myth implicitly promulgated by these men is that their wives do the work these men is that their wives do the work at home… because they notice it, they’re at home… because they notice it, they’re better at it, and they enjoy it more.” better at it, and they enjoy it more.”

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The social contextThe social context

The larger culture’s assumptions about The larger culture’s assumptions about women who work too much and men who women who work too much and men who share equally. Coworkers, bosses, share equally. Coworkers, bosses, mothers-in-lawmothers-in-law

Creating a new social worldCreating a new social world– ¾ of the equally sharing fathers know someone ¾ of the equally sharing fathers know someone

else doing the sameelse doing the same– Only 18% of the 25-75 fathersOnly 18% of the 25-75 fathers– ““Equal sharers… actively work to create this Equal sharers… actively work to create this

alternative world.” alternative world.”

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Money, time, work, familyMoney, time, work, family

– Time at workTime at work: In the 75-25 families, : In the 75-25 families, fathers averaged 14 more hours of paid fathers averaged 14 more hours of paid work per week than their partnerswork per week than their partners

– In the 50/50 families, only 1 hour more.In the 50/50 families, only 1 hour more.– Earnings: Earnings: controlling for hours worked, controlling for hours worked,

no difference among the 50/50, 60-40, no difference among the 50/50, 60-40, and 50/50 families. and 50/50 families.

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Money, work and family IIMoney, work and family II

““Gender influences three important Gender influences three important types of job-related decisions parents types of job-related decisions parents make: how much time to allocate to make: how much time to allocate to paid employment, whether to take or paid employment, whether to take or give up opportunities for career give up opportunities for career advancement, and how to take advancement, and how to take advantage of potential flexibility in advantage of potential flexibility in their jobs.” their jobs.”

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Career sacrificesCareer sacrifices

– Many occupations have some room for limiting Many occupations have some room for limiting hours, but almost always at a cost in terms of hours, but almost always at a cost in terms of advancement (remember Amerco, where you advancement (remember Amerco, where you couldn’t be a top manager without working couldn’t be a top manager without working 70+ hours a week)70+ hours a week)

– ““Male investment and female disinvestment in Male investment and female disinvestment in jobs then fuels the inequality in parenting.” jobs then fuels the inequality in parenting.”

– ““Gendered choices at one time do not preclude Gendered choices at one time do not preclude gender-resisting choices at another.” gender-resisting choices at another.”

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Downshifting to equalityDownshifting to equality

Accept that in order to be a really Accept that in order to be a really involved and equal parent, you will involved and equal parent, you will have to accomplish less in the world have to accomplish less in the world of work than someone with no family of work than someone with no family commitments. commitments. – ““Even Jonathan lives with regrets about Even Jonathan lives with regrets about

his career, but he also knows that his his career, but he also knows that his career sacrifices have allowed him the career sacrifices have allowed him the happiest parts of his life, caring for his happiest parts of his life, caring for his children.” children.”

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Why Couples Don’t Practice What Why Couples Don’t Practice What They PreachThey Preach

““Gender equality often just doesn’t Gender equality often just doesn’t feel right?” “Intellectually I believe feel right?” “Intellectually I believe all the right things. I don’t always all the right things. I don’t always feel them correctly?” Why?feel them correctly?” Why?– Deep-rooted cultural images about Deep-rooted cultural images about

women and children, men and women and children, men and workwork

– Implicit messages from coworkers, Implicit messages from coworkers, parents, peersparents, peers

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Men and workMen and work

– ““Jobs were often seen as a given, Jobs were often seen as a given, nonnegotiable part of men’s identities. nonnegotiable part of men’s identities. We saw in the last chapter that men We saw in the last chapter that men usually maximize their job usually maximize their job opportunities.”opportunities.”

Instructor: How much of this is based on Instructor: How much of this is based on the upper middle class status of many of the upper middle class status of many of the men in her study?the men in her study?

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Women and MotheringWomen and Mothering

One mother discovered a “very strong One mother discovered a “very strong gut feeling of wanting to be part of her gut feeling of wanting to be part of her children’s lives in a major way.” Another children’s lives in a major way.” Another woman said of her infant daughter: “I woman said of her infant daughter: “I want to be with her every minute.”want to be with her every minute.”

““Yet for every unequal mother who told Yet for every unequal mother who told me she found infant care immensely me she found infant care immensely satisfying, I found many more who were satisfying, I found many more who were desperately unhappy during the years desperately unhappy during the years they spent at home without paid work.”they spent at home without paid work.”

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Switching places??Switching places??

– D: “Two other mothers I interviewed, D: “Two other mothers I interviewed, happily working part-time, saw happily working part-time, saw themselves as relatively advantaged themselves as relatively advantaged compared to their husbands… Both compared to their husbands… Both women claimed their husbands would women claimed their husbands would love to change places with them.”love to change places with them.”

– ““Despite these mothers’ claims, their Despite these mothers’ claims, their husbands weren’t the least bit husbands weren’t the least bit interested in changing roles.” interested in changing roles.”

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Alternating Shift WorkersAlternating Shift Workers

– Among dual-earner couples with Among dual-earner couples with children under 15, 51% have a parent children under 15, 51% have a parent working a non-day shiftworking a non-day shift

– Often a very equal division of family Often a very equal division of family work and paid workwork and paid work

– But a very different set of values and But a very different set of values and motivations than most of the upper motivations than most of the upper middle class “equal sharers”middle class “equal sharers”

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Why work alternate shifts?Why work alternate shifts?

FinancesFinances Childcare options:Childcare options:

– ““I get nervous having to trust somebody. I get nervous having to trust somebody. There’s too many crazy people out there.”There’s too many crazy people out there.”

– ““I don’t let people outside my family watch my I don’t let people outside my family watch my kids.” kids.”

Values: “We both have the same Values: “We both have the same understanding of how we want to raise our understanding of how we want to raise our kids, with all the same goals and values.” kids, with all the same goals and values.”

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Impact on fathersImpact on fathers

““No father has changed more than David. No father has changed more than David. David and Theresa have been alternating David and Theresa have been alternating shifts longer than any of the other couples. shifts longer than any of the other couples. …Today David looks like the model of the …Today David looks like the model of the new man. He’s learned the practical skills new man. He’s learned the practical skills of taking care of children, has become of taking care of children, has become more emotionally tuned to them, and has more emotionally tuned to them, and has developed a different understanding of developed a different understanding of men’s and women’s roles in the family.”men’s and women’s roles in the family.”

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Traditional gender ideology Traditional gender ideology

– Men are the breadwinners, agree both Men are the breadwinners, agree both spouses, although a number of the spouses, although a number of the women earn more per hour. women earn more per hour.

– The mother is the primary parent, and The mother is the primary parent, and again both spouses agree.again both spouses agree.

– – Husbands tend to maintain that their Husbands tend to maintain that their

wives work only out of financial wives work only out of financial necessity; many of their wives disagree. necessity; many of their wives disagree.

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EgalitarianismEgalitarianism

““Despite the ways in which these Despite the ways in which these working-class men and women assert working-class men and women assert traditional gender identities, it is traditional gender identities, it is important to note the egalitarianism important to note the egalitarianism of their lives.” of their lives.”

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Equality WorksEquality Works

““Equality is good for children. It is Equality is good for children. It is simply easier for two devoted simply easier for two devoted parents to meet children’s needs…”parents to meet children’s needs…”

““Equal sharing can strengthen a Equal sharing can strengthen a marriage because family work, when marriage because family work, when shared, becomes a bond rather than shared, becomes a bond rather than a barrier to intimacy.” a barrier to intimacy.”

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What needs to change to make What needs to change to make equal sharing more possible?equal sharing more possible?

““Careers are designed for men.”Careers are designed for men.”

– ““Conventional careers demand the Conventional careers demand the willingness to put in long working hours, willingness to put in long working hours, to relocate for good job opportunities, to to relocate for good job opportunities, to shield work from personal shield work from personal responsibilities, and to give work priority responsibilities, and to give work priority over family. Career building at its most over family. Career building at its most intense occurs during the childbearing intense occurs during the childbearing years.” years.”

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De-gendering parenthoodDe-gendering parenthood

““Perhaps the thorniest issue in Perhaps the thorniest issue in inventing truly genderless parenting inventing truly genderless parenting is how we can reconstruct the is how we can reconstruct the meaning of motherhood. I wonder meaning of motherhood. I wonder how most mothers would feel if their how most mothers would feel if their identity was simply expressed by the identity was simply expressed by the word ‘parent’ instead of ‘mother.’”word ‘parent’ instead of ‘mother.’”

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Final words from changing parentsFinal words from changing parents

– A mother: “I think a child can have two A mother: “I think a child can have two number ones, I really do… I am not number ones, I really do… I am not afraid of losing my role.”afraid of losing my role.”

– ““When I asked Barry if he thought his When I asked Barry if he thought his child had two mothers or two fathers, he child had two mothers or two fathers, he was surprised by his own answer. ‘Boy, was surprised by his own answer. ‘Boy, that’s a great question and as much as that’s a great question and as much as it’s an affront to my masculinity, I think it’s an affront to my masculinity, I think it’s more like two mothers. Yeah I really it’s more like two mothers. Yeah I really do.”do.”