LIQUID ALCHEMY

IN THE GARDENSEPARATING FACT FROM FICTION IN URBAN AND SUB-URBAN GARDENING MYTHS, P. 20

VOLUME 2 | ISSUE 7 | FEB 22 – MAR 1 | 2013 WWW.SANTABARBARASENTINEL .COM

once a week from pier to peak

GOLETA GIRLCOULD PIGEON DUNG HAVE BEEN

JACKSON POLLOCK’S ARTISTIC INSPIRATION, HIS MUSE?, P. 14

SANTA BARBARA

HOUSE HUNTERSTURN TO PAGE 31

SBVIEW.comPAGE 12

PRESIDIOSPORTSPAGE 16

HANDSFULLSB.comPAGE 28

LOVEMIKANA .comPAGE 29

LIQUID ALCHEMY: bREwINg bEER & ROCKET SCIENCE

THE bREwHOUSE CELEbRATES TEN YEARS OF TAMINg THE bIg JOHNSON AND COURTINg STRONg, SwEET, bUT TOUgH bONNIE JEAN (Story on P. 9)

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ContentP.5 Mazza’s Missive – Editor-in-Chief Matt Mazza waxes nostalgic about an old friend

doing new things. Who is it? What’s she doing? Go read the column already.

P.6 It’s Crime Time with SBPD – We’re done. Everybody else is right. There is no joy in the very serious social commentary that a small town crime blotter provides. RIP all hints of sarcasm and fun.

P.7 Letters to the Editor – Matt’s personal vent garners support, but he probably shouldn’t respond to every letter and the shades must go. (But that life jacket…)

P.9 The Beer Guy – Zach Rosen helps celebrate The Brewhouse’s tenth anniversary with Brewmaster Pete and five special releases. (And anybody who writes things like “biscuit-like toastiness that leaves a warmth in the chest” about beer is a friend of mine. Thanks Zach, nice column.)

P.10 Eight Days A Week – What’s happening around town for the next eight days? Check out some of our favorite picks in the Sentinel’s new quasi-calendar.

P.12 Santa Barbara View – Sharon Byrne picks up where Crime Time left off (sort of); Loretta Redd brings a new (gloomy?) take on the Funk Zone and Harbor; Ray Estrada has a look at commercial real estate in the State Street corridor.

P.14 Goleta Girl – Jana Mackin recovers well from her stint with writer’s block, and puts together a terrific piece about the nexus between Jackson Pollock’s painting style and splattered pigeon poop. (Hilarious, Jana, welcome back.)

P.16 Presidio Sports – Nicole Lantagne Welch is Kathy Gregory’s successor to the UCSB women’s volleyball crown, DP boys hoops light it up against fourth-ranked Elsinore in a second round CIF win and all the latest and greatest in local sports.

P.18 Girl About Town – Julie Bifano gets some info on Moms in Motion… and decides to join. (Uh oh, our Girl About Town is going health nut on us. Isn’t she supposed to go out drinking with the young people and report on that whole scene?)

P.20 In the Garden with Mr. Greenjeans – More garden myths debunked. (What about those veggies, Randy?)

P.25 Dust & Cover – New addition Jeremy Harbin drops a fresh track about the mysterious and prolific R. Stevie Moore. Go see the man (the legend?) rock Isla Vista on February 28.

P.27 Keeping It Reel – Jim Luksic gives his Oscar predictions and thoughts on contending flicks. And he takes a look at Die Hard 12 (or is it 13?) and Safe Haven. Check out the Sentinel’s movie guide as well.

P.28 You Have Your Hands Full – Call Homeland Security. Osama bin Charlie, the three-year-old terrorist living somewhere on the upper Eastside, is plotting an attack upon all that is good and decent in western civilization. Be afraid.

P.29 LOVEmikana – Trail running at Elings Park and home spa products from Summerland. And the Weekend Guide keeps your busy calendar chock full.

P.30 Residential Real Estate – Hope Ranch never looked so good. (Right Mike?) And the Sentinel’s new open house guide will help you plan your weekend home-shopping caravan. (Honey, load up the minivan, we’re going house hunting… and we’re hitting Home Depot on the way back. Nice little Sunday.)

P.31 Open Houses – Neatly arrayed by neighborhoods from Santa Barbara to Goleta, the Sentinel’s non-confusing, somewhat all-encompassing Sunday afternoon house-hunting guide.


I like people. (The interesting ones, anyway.) I like talking with them, listening to them, learning about their

perspectives and insights, their experiences and knowledge and understanding. There’s really not much better, for me, anyway, than just sitting around and talking about stuff people actually care about.

(Anecdotally, that’s why I like food and wine so much; nothing begets great conversation like a terrific meal and a bottle of vino around a table filled with friends old and new. But that’s another column for another time.)

Yeah, people are good. They make the world go around.

Santa Barbara just so happens to be chock full of interesting folks. Folks like Rob Bjorklund and Jenny Schatzle and Tammy Macala and many, many others. If you stop and take the time to listen, you’ll likely find that some of the people you pass every day on your walk to get

that (third) cup of coffee have cool stories that somehow end up with them landing here in town. We’re a regular magnate for people who have done interesting stuff. That creativity and drive within our often surprisingly diverse community is a real asset, one that should be celebrated and nurtured.

A very interesting local personality drifted (back) into my field of vision and thus my thoughts this past week, and she is on the precipice of doing something creative, something wonderful.

Something very interesting.So I thought I’d write about her.

A Christmas CarolThis engaging woman whom many

of you undoubtedly know is actually an old friend I met in December 2009 (or was it 2008?). It was Christmastime, very near the holiday itself, and I was

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Mary Ellen, relaxed and radiant at Tre Lune. Now get on that plane, woman, have some fun and keep in touch!

by Matt Mazza

MAZZA’S MISSIVE

A Santa Barbara Story

toiling away like Bob Cratchit in my old law firm at Anacapa and De La Guerra late one afternoon while most others were undoubtedly home with loved ones devouring figgy pudding and bathing in eggnog and brandy by a warm fire. (Although, to be fair, I wouldn’t extend the Dickensian metaphor to characterize my former boss, still a trusted friend and confidant, as Ebenezer Scrooge; it just wasn’t that way.) I was alone in the cold office, sitting in the library, nose buried deep in some ancient legal tome, when the front door swung open hard and a middle-aged woman, quite cute, burst forth into the foyer.

She had a bottle of wine in one hand and a card in the other, and she appeared troubled. Quite troubled indeed.

Our receptionist had long ago left for the celebration ahead, and I quickly made my way up front.

“Is there something I can help you with, miss?”

“Well, I… I just can’t find my friend’s office and I’m in a huge hurry and I need to get this to him before the holiday and and and…” She was flustered, talking quickly, with arms flailing and head bobbing and feet tapping on the hardwood floor beneath her.

She shoved the card in front of me.“Do you know the address?”“Yeah, here, it’s around back. Go

through the old tunnel, up the stairs… well, look, it’ll be easier if I just take it up there. Can I leave it by the door if nobody’s


Crime Time Quote Of The Week

SBPD: “Any special medical needs, Miss?”

WOMAN: “Not as many as you, mother (bad word)er!”

Editor-in-Chief • Matt Mazza Design/Production • Trent Watanabe

Contributing PartnersOpinion • sbview.com

Sports • Presidiosports.comSanta Barbara Skinny • LoveMikana.com

ColumnistsGoleta Girl • Jana Mackin | She Has Her Hands Full • Mara Peters

Plan B • Briana Westmacott | The Dish • Wendy JensonJournal Jim • James Buckley | Real Estate • Michael Calcagno

Commercial Corner • Austin Herlihy | The Weekly Capitalist • Jeff HardingMan About Town • Mark Leisure | In The Garden • Randy Arnowitz

The Beer Guy • Zach Rosen | The Mindful Word • Diana M. RaabGirl About Town • Julie Bifano | Dust & Cover • Jeremy Harbin

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It'sCrimetime... ...with the SBPD

A variety of crimes are committed every day in Santa Barbara; most of these crimes are petty but they do offer a window into if not the soul of the perpetra-tor, at least his or her thought process. Our following (and totally unsolicited) thoughts, observations, and comments are put forth for your consideration.

A White Flag?This is gonna be awkward.

Let´s start here: We´re not afraid of a fight. Not in the slightest. In fact, over the relatively short span of the Sentinel´s life, we´ve

done our best to stick to our guns, as they say, to stand by our positions with integrity and fortitude. We like to think that we´ve been relatively successful in that regard.

But even the strongest among us blinks sometimes. Even the Titanic hits the occasional iceberg.

And, much like the storied ocean liner, our hull has been breached. We´d patch it, of course, like we´ve done in the past, but we´re bloodied

and battered from battling the banal brawlers berating our brusque and often blunt blotter.

Bunk.So that´s it. We´ve had enough. Toss in the towel, Mick, Balboa´s going

down in the twelfth. He just doesn´t have any fight left in him.Without further ado, then, hey everybody. It´s Crime Time. Neat-o.

A 53-year-old homeless woman drank too much and was arrested for public intoxication.

A 30-year-old Santa Barbara man beat his girlfriend and was arrested.

A 63-year old homeless woman drank too much and was arrested for public intoxication.

A 27-year-old homeless man drank too much and was arrested for public intoxication.

A male 20-something from Buellton was arrested for public intoxication on a public sidewalk.

A male 20-something from Santa Ynez was arrested for public intoxication on a public sidewalk.

A 29-year-old Santa Barbara man was found with crack and arrested.

A 32-year-old Santa Barbara man stole a beer and was arrested for petty theft.

A 43-year-old woman was caught stealing clothes for her kids from Sears and arrested for burglary.


A male Santa Barbara man bought meth on his bicycle and was arrested.

A 34-year-old man was found slumped over his steering wheel, leaning to the right, and was arrested for driving under the influence.

A 21-year-old man drank too much and was arrested for public intoxication.

A 52-year-old parolee drank too much and was arrested for public intoxication. He told officers, I´m going to (bad word) kill you.

A 30-year-old Santa Barbara man possessed and consumed many pills for which he had no prescription and was arrested.

A highly intoxicated Carpinteria woman beat up her boyfriend and was arrested for domestic violence charges.

A 40-year-old Santa Barbara man drank too much and was arrested for public intoxication.



A 19-year-old man beat up his girlfriend and was arrested.

A 29-year-old Arcata resident drank too much and was arrested for public intoxication.


A 34-year-old local man was arrested for driving under the influence.

A 25-year-old Goleta resident drank too much, got in a fight and was arrested.

A sex offender failed to register and was arrested.

What a week. Yay.


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Letters Although you might not believe it, we actually want to hear from you. So if you have something you think we should know about or you see something we've said that you think is cretinous (or

perspicacious, to be fair), then let us know. There's no limit on words or subject matter, so go ahead and let it rip to: Santa Barbara Sentinel, Letters to the Editor, 133 East De La Guerra Street, No. 182, Santa Barbara, California 93101. You can also leap into the 21st century and email us at [email protected].

Thank You

...continued p.8

Dear Matt, I want to thank you for bringing fresh, humorous and astute observations to our Santa

Barbara scene with the Santa Barbara Sentinel. Your reply to the recent letter from Dave Hopkins was very much appreciated. Thank you for sharing another piece of yourself with your reading public. Such candidness is rare these days.

Also, I’m sorry if you’ve gotten criticism over the paper’s crime reporting. Your comments make the local dreary crime scene readable and you often write what my husband and I would have written – only better.

Keep up the great work, Matt, and thank you for letting your personality shine through. You sound like a fellow we would like to get to know. Meanwhile, we’ll keep looking forward to the next issue of the Sentinel.

Sharron AdamsSanta Barbara(Editor’s Note: Thanks for this, Sharron,

I genuinely appreciate your appreciation of my reply to Mr. Hopkins’ letter. It was a bit of a vent, admittedly, but I’m ultimately glad it’s out there. I’m also glad that you’re enjoying Crime Time. You’re not alone. I’m approached most days at this point with compliments about the Sentinel, and Crime Time is nearly always called out by name as a fun and insightful (if not vaguely depressing) read. I’ll live through the criticism, don’t worry. Thanks again for the letter, Sharron, please do keep reading. Any hey, I’d be happy to buy you a cup of coffee if you’re interested. You sound like a person I’d enjoy meeting too. – MSM)

A Good Response…But Are Responses Always Necessary?

Matt – I wanted to take a moment to compliment you on your response to this week’s letter regarding homelessness.

Responses to letters have always been one of the love/hate issues I have with the Montecito Journal and the Santa Barbara Sentinel. Not sure I think the publication should get the last word in every situation, but appreciate your response in general, especially considering the life-long connection to the issue you have been forced to carry. Too often, this group DEMANDS that we put up with poor behavior and not respond. Never do they seem to accept that their collective behavior leads to the response and that the behavior thus needs to improve.

Otherwise, I’m just waiting for you to take the gangsta sunglasses off the profile picture, but the life vest last week was definitely becoming.

Mike JordanSanta Barbara(Editor’s Note: Great letter, Mike. The

truth is that we received a fair number of supportive notes and emails about my response to Dave Hopkins’ letter and I appreciate all of them. And I think that your comment about demands and behavior and consequences is well put. But your letter also raised the dreaded “letter


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response” issue I’ve heard so much about – I was wondering when somebody would call us out on that in a letter – and thought, perhaps ironically, that I’d respond.

I actually tend to agree with you, believe it or not. I (we) shouldn’t always get the proverbial last word, and I frankly try to craft responses that are somewhat balanced and fair (while at the same time reflective of my thinking) and open at least the potential for further discussion. In fact, I’d argue that you see multi-party conversations developing in the section pretty frequently (e.g., references to former letters and responses are quite common). Crime Time is a perfect example. People like it or don’t and write in. I respond. Then more people join the conversation, picking up on new aspects of an earlier letter or response. And onward we go until we’ve either sufficiently beaten a dead horse (excuse the metaphor, it leaves a bad taste) or there is just no more interest from the reading public. The point is that I don’t always get the last word, and letters provide a nice forum for readers to speak their minds and get some insight into the Sentinel’s thinking and positions. And, like Crime Time, our letters are quite well-read and often cited to me as a terrific part of the paper.

You also raised the sunglasses issue (they’re RayBans, for the record, not exactly “gangsta” but I get the point). They started as a little joke by Publisher Tim Buckley but stuck for one reason or another. (They hide the massive bags under my eyes, for one.) We’ve discussed getting rid of them but they are still here. Maybe you’ll like them better in summertime. The life-preserver a couple weeks ago (and lumberjack suspenders last week) are also lovely little jokes by the esteemed Mr. Buckley, quietly slipped in post-editorial function in collaboration with our wonderful and quite creative production designer, Trent Watanabe. Hilarious. I guess I’m like a mannequin on which to hang whatever inappropriate

props Tim and Trent deem funny each week. Great.

Just remember this: Revenge is a dish best served cold. And payback is a bitch.

Thanks for your letter, Mike, much appreciated. Oh, I invite you to respond, of course. – MSM)

Wood Is GoodHey Matt, I enjoyed your piece on

Robert Bjorklund last week. He’s a mysterious character and I’ve heard bits and pieces about him (in fact, my boyfriend and I were just talking about him a few days before your column came out) and have even been to his ranch, but never knew the full story about his wood reclamation business. Thanks for the peek behind closed doors (if you can say that about an outdoorsy kind of guy!).

I was also really moved by your response in the Letters to the Editor section. Thank you for sharing your personal story about your family and alcoholism. It takes a lot to reveal your personal life, and I know someone out there reading will be inspired by you and what you wrote. I certainly am.

AnonymousSanta Barbara(Editor’s Note: Rob is indeed an interesting

and fairly mysterious guy – though once you spend a few moments with him, you quickly learn that he really is a cards on the table type of guy – and I really enjoyed meeting him. He’s sort of what you might expect if you know a little about him, only more authentic and cooler. Truth be told, I’d love to spend more time and space talking about Rob and his Bjorklund Ranch and their storied history… but that’s another column for another day. (It’s probably more of a biographical work that stands alone, but I digress.) Regardless, I’m glad you liked the peek behind closed doors. Keep picking us up. Thanks. – MSM)

...continued from p.7

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There are few places that exemplify and truly highlight the local Santa Barbara beer scene so authentically

as the folks at The Brewhouse (229 West Montecito Street). And they’ve been doing it for quite a while now.

In fact, this Valentine’s Day marked their tenth anniversary. To celebrate, The Brewhouse is currently offering five special strong beers (you can taste all five for $10 or just pick and choose your favorite pints). Very cool.

I recently met up with brewmaster and co-owner, Pete Johnson, to taste the brews and discuss ten years of The Brewhouse.

A Storied HistoryStanding behind the bar – with beer

in hand, naturally – Pete talked casually about the SB stalwart. He smiled and nostagically pointed out two indentations in the ceiling where the original brewing equipment was located. When complications arose with the opening of the brewpub, that equipment ended up going elsewhere and even though the marks remain where the brewing kettle’s exhaust piping once stood, the system was never used at The Brewhouse. They ultimately bought new brewing equipment, which is still in use today, and installed it behind the bar. (This location made it difficult to brew when the restaurant was open and Pete would often have to come in at night to brew their beers.)

When the laundromat next door closed, The Brewhouse bought the building and installed a separate room for the brewery. (A steel beam running along the ceiling remains, illustrating where the laundromat’s wall once stood.) The new equipment location made it easier for Pete

to begin brewing during the day and now locals will often see him at The Brewhouse as he works, occasionally drifting into the restaurant to talk beer with the guests.

Tenth Anniversary BeersDiscussing the limited beers released

for their tenth anniversary, Pete told me that he “like(s) to think of them as five barley wines. There are the two regular barley wines (Big Johnson Batch 500 and Batch 1000), the over-hopped barley wine (Imperial Rocket Science Red), the Belgian barley wine (St Barb’s XXXX), and the sweet barley wine (Bonnie Jean Scotch Ale).” (Pete’s explorative style of brewing pays homage to his previous career as a rocket scientist for NASA.)

As we discussed the brews, I noticed

Pete’s five magical anniversary beers (left to right): St Barb’s XXXX, Imperial Rocket Science Red, Bonnie Jean, Big Johnson Batch 500, Batch 1000.

Brewmaster Pete at the helm of The Brewhouse’s brewing system.

Pete says goodbye to more hops as he works on The Brewhouse’s famous IPA.

Ten Years of The Brewhouse

by Zach Rosen

Zach Rosen is a Certified Cicerone® and beer educator living in Santa Barbara. He uses his background in chemical engineering and the arts to seek out abstract expressions of beer and discover how beer pairs with life.

three animated objects roaming the window sill of the brewery and asked about them. “They’re weasels,” he told me, matter-of-factly. “People like to ask whether brewing is more of an art or a science. I think of it as part-art, part-science… but there’s also some magic. The weasel’s guard the brewery from any dark magic. They’ve been here from the beginning.”

I like Pete. The liquid alchemist finished describing

the beers and as our conversation ended, he left to lead a small group on an impromptu brewery tour. The local nature of The Brewhouse is channeled straight through Pete and the central coast beer scene looks forward to tasting another ten years of his beers within the comfortable confines of the brewpub’s native charm.

Now, let’s drink some beer.

The Big JohnsonFor the tenth anniversary, two editions

of this barley wine are being offered. On April 9, 2009, The Brewhouse brewed the Big Johnson for their five hundredth batch. Now with almost four years of aging, part of which occurred in bourbon barrels, the beer’s flavor is full of raisins, sherry and vanilla with marmalade. Bourbon notes round everything out. There is an underlying tartness that comes from the microbial inhabitants of the wood. The body has been mellowed by age and oak into a voluptuous, soft experience that is finished with a sparkling, fine carbonation. They only have one keg of the beer, so this elegant offering is extremely limited and will be gone soon.

By luck, The Brewhouse’s thousandth batch of beer happened to coincide with their tenth anniversary. In honor of batch 1000, Pete re-brewed the Big Johnson. This new version was infused with wooden spirals of American oak to quickly impart their vanilla and woodey characteristics. The bitterness is much stronger and has not diminished yet (that typically occurs as a beer ages). The cedar notes of the hops, caramel-sweet malts and bourbon flavors are much richer than in the older version. Both the beers are beautiful and offer different sides of the same component that exemplifies the effects of aging beer.

St Barb’s XXXXThis Belgian-style quadruple is the only

blond beer in the litter. The golden brew has flavors of red apples, cloves and a pronounced yeast (bread-like) quality with a floral perfume lingering underneath. The sweet liquid goes down smoothly with notes of honey, brown sugar and a biscuit-like toastiness that leaves a warmth in the chest.

Bonnie Jean Scotch AleThis Scotch ale has always been a

personal favorite. The name references the song entitled “I’ll Go Home with Bonnie Jean” from the musical Brigadoon, which Pete would often sing while courting his wife, Jean. Pete warns me, “and like my wife, the beer is strong, sweet, and if you’re not careful with it, it’ll smack you upside the head.” He’s right. The brew is full bodied with a slight roastiness to the malt character that gives a cocoa-like finish to the flavors of ripe plums and moist brown sugar.

Imperial Rocket Science Red

Named after Pete’s time spent at NASA, the imperial version of this American red has only been brewed once. Pete saved one keg to open for their tenth anniversary. Now with almost a year of age, the toffee sweetness, melon and bitter grapefruit flavors have been transformed into an effervescent liqueur laced with notes of pine resin and sweet tea with orange peels. This delicacy is scarce and worth making a speedy arrival to The Brewhouse to ensure that you get to experience it.

•••Congratulations to Pete and

everybody else who has helped make The Brewhouse a Santa Barbara favorite for more than ten years now; we’re looking forward to ten more. My only closing thought is that any self-respecting beer person better hurry up and get tasting – these are five special beers and they will be gone before you know it.

So see you at The Brewhouse soon. Better hurry or I’ll drink yours too.


8•Days•a•WeekWe Ain’t Got Nothin’ But Love, Babe…

• FridayFebruary 22 • Ah, it’s Friday again. (Thank goodness.) This particular Friday just so happens to be the 281st birthday of George Washington and the 140th birthday of our very own Lobero Theatre. So we say celebrate. Head down to the Palace – a festive place indeed – and get yourself a Cajun Martini and some Gumbo (we love the Oysters Palace too) followed by a Crawfish Etouffée or Blackened Fresh Louisiana Redfish. (Dixie Beer goes well with both.) Finish yourself off with a Louisiana Bread Pudding Soufflé. You’ll sleep well, trust us. And say hi to Errol and Karen and the rest of the gang. You’ll have a blast, for sure, just like the hordes of tourists do every year.• Alternatively, you could take a more academic route and head up

to UCSB’s Campbell Hall for a free talk by former Foreign Minister of Mexico Jorge Castaneda called Immigration in Global Perspective. Castaneda has written many books and has taught everywhere from Cal to Princeton to NYU and the University of Cambridge (not to mention Mexico’s Autonomous University). His talk is the keynote lecture of the annual Santa Barbara Global Studies Conference and is presented by UCSB Arts & Lectures, the UCSB Global

& International Studies Program and the Orfalea Foundation. It starts at 8pm and should be a good one. www.ArtsAndLectures.UCSB.edu.

• SaturdayFebruary 23• It’s time to get your life together and take some of Michael Calcagno’s

advice – learn about buying a house if you haven’t already! The Coastal Housing Partnership is putting on its Second Annual Home Buying Fair

at the Earl Warren Showgrounds, and it is designed to provide tools to help navigate the home buying process in a changing real estate market. Free “how to” sessions will be presented on key aspects of the transaction and there will be tons of exhibitor booths with local realtors, lenders, inspectors, escrow companies, developers and more. $5 gets you in, and could save you thousands when you go make that big purchase. (No brainer.) The Home Buying Fair starts at 10am and goes to 3pm. Maybe you’ll even get a chance to meet Michael himself!

• SundayFebruary 24• Sunday. Chill. Wake up late, hit Scarlett Begonia for a mid-morning

breakfast and then head up to SOhO to spend a few hours with Nansie Chapman as she celebrates her debut CD, Fading Memories. (If you dig Santa Barbara Family Life Magazine (we do), then you should dig Nansie – she founded the mag and has served as its publisher and editor for the past 15 years.) Think mellow, with poetic depth (although we hear she gets it going with a country number too). Think Sunday. Noon – 3pm. $10. www.sohosb.com.

• MondayFebruary 25• We’re feeling a nice little Monday this week (especially if you take our

advice and do the whole Scarlett Begonia – SOhO thing on Sunday). Don’t overdo it, just ease your way into the work day with the knowledge that you’re heading over to Oreana Winery in the Funk Zone at 7:30pm to check out Polly Frost’s one woman show, “Bad Role Models and What I Learned From Them.” We don’t know Polly, frankly, but we like the idea of what she’s doing – not stand-up but storytelling and reflections with history and humor from

a SoCal and Santa Barbara native who now writes (The New Yorker, New York Times and others) and performs in NYC – and we love Oreana Winery. Try something new and have a good time. www.oreanawinery.com; www.pollyfrost.com. Call (805) 450-9955 for reservations.

• TuesdayFebruary 26• Go see some art. The Abstract Art Collective, a Santa Barbara-based group of local artists established to create a vital and energetic creative community, is opening its Second Annual Members Exhibition, called Peripheral Visions, at the Cabrillo Pavilion Arts Center (1118 East Cabrillo Boulevard). The reception begins at 5:30pm and goes until around 7:30pm. Nice little way to spend a wintry Tuesday evening. www.abstractartcollective.com. • Speaking of art, plein air painter and Santa Barbara native Jeremy

Harper will be showing his local landscape pieces at the Faulkner East Gallery inside the S.B. Public Library. Jeremy attended the San Francisco Art Institute and eventually traveled to China and

Want to be a part of Eight Days A Week?Space is limited, but if you have an event, exhibit, performance, book signing, sale, opening, trunk show, or anything else interesting or creative

that readers can attend, let us know at 805-845-1673 or email us at santabarbarasentinel.com. We’ll consider all suggestions, but we will give extra consideration to unusual events and/or items, especially those accompanied by a good visual, particularly one that has yet to be published.


r e s t a u r a n t

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m o n - f r i 1 1 a m – 9 p m • S at - S u n 9 a m - 9 p m

unique mexican dining experience

unique

mexican

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experience

Europe to study art from nearly every corner of the world. Check out his show from February 21 to 28. The gallery is open Monday – Thursday from 10am – 7pm, Friday and Saturday from 10am – 5:30pm, and Sunday from 1pm – 5pm. www.jeremy-harper.com

• WednesdayFebruary 27• Have a little more Film Festival in you? Good. Head over to the Arlington

Theatre for two nights of the very Best of the Banff Mountain Film Festival, featuring 15 of the world’s best films and videos on mountain subjects including Grand Prize and People’s Choice winner Crossing the Ice and the desert highlining film, Moonwalk. We

checked out the full lineup and can confidently say that if you dig things outdoors and travel, then this will be a hit. www.ArtsAndLectures.UCSB.edu; www.thearlingtontheatre.com.

• ThursdayFebruary 28• It’s Thursday night and it’s been a long week. (Especially if you’ve done half the things listed above.) You could hit the second night of the Banff Film Festival at the Arlington, or you could check out AB 540 College Night at San Marcos High, which will educate immigrant students (and others who are interested) about college admissions, the Dream Act Application Process and other relevant topics. We’re big into education around here and really hope this event is well attended. Head over to San Marcos High School (4750 Hollister Avenue) from 6-7:30pm. Check out www.ab540coalition.org for more information. • And if neither of these works for you, then just go take a walk on the beach, even if the weather sucks. Bundle up and stroll, man, Santa Barbara it. Bring a camera. Play around with it. Take your time. Don’t know where to go? You’re blowing it. Try a new beach, anywhere from Carp to Goleta. (Call Matt, he’s happy to make suggestions.) Don’t know when to go? Look at a tide chart and figure it out.

• FridayMarch 1 • First of all, you want to be looking your best for the big weekend ahead. So get over to Riviera Smiles on Coast Village Road and meet Dr. Ana R. Martinez, DDS at her open house event. Riviera Smiles does advanced aesthetic and laser dentistry for you and your family, and is worth checking out. You could probably use a cleaning… and some whitening might be a good idea too. 1187 Coast Village Road, Suite 11 (805.617.0686). Noon to 5pm.• Then get your pearly whites over to the Santa Barbara Museum of Art for famed art historian Nigel McGilchrist’s virtual tour of some of his favorite secret places in the world for savoring art, food and la dolce vita in his Off-the-Beaten Path: Armchair Travels to Italy with Nigel McGilchrist. If you don’t already have the winter travel bug, you’ll get it – and you’ll learn some very cool places where Nigel likes to go get artsy. (We like the sound of that.) The show starts at 5pm. $5 SBMA members/$7 non-members. We’re in. www.sbma.net.


Brinkerhoff is an active crew of engaged senior citizens in West

Downtown. My neighbor Tony jokes that the “Brinkerhoff Historical District” feels sometimes like it’s the “Brinkerhoff Hysterical District.” He and his wife, Caroline, their neighbor Carl, and Wanda at the corner… well you can’t beat them for stellar neighbors.

This weekend, they awoke to a slew of graffiti scrawls in the alley:

Tony emailed the neighbors, our counterparts on the Eastside, the mayor, and others. The mayor and Frank Hotchkiss jumped in quickly to our email conversation about goings-on in the area. Tony reported the responding officers were attentive, and took photos.

Historically, Eastside gang vandalism west of State is typically followed by a slew of Westsider scrawls, and vice versa. They taunt each other on the walls of each other’s neighborhoods, write over each other’s markings, and then it escalates into assaults, fights, and historically in our case, murder. Five years ago today, Bartholomeo Leal was stabbed to death on our street by six Eastsiders.

According to the Thought Police of Things Politically Correct, there’s no gang problem. These are not the droids you’re looking for. Some are unhappy about the proposed gang injunction, and some are in denial about gangs in the area.

If they had to repeatedly paint over scrawls in our neighborhood, if they saw the fights, the intimidation of families that goes on, they might see things differently. Living up close and personal to it changes your view; it changed mine. I now know things about gang protocols and movements that I never imagined I’d need to learn.

The George Ied murder trial started last week. Walking home from his job at a liquor store on Milpas Street one October night in 2010, Ied was beaten by four gang-members, two of whom had just been paroled from convictions obtained via the Gator Roll. Ied, 37, with no gang affiliations, died a few days later in the hospital, never regaining consciousness.

His attackers are named in the proposed gang injunction. Some think that’s dumb. They’re already in jail, right?

Well if they somehow get acquitted, consider the injunction as a sort of back-up plan.

West Downtown was informed that

we’re not a high-crime district. This, after a shooting and two murders took place in a one-block area within four months. In any other city, that kind of activity would probably rank your block eligible for the police to move in with you. But here, there are no official high crime districts, rendering this odd sense of a sci-fi dystopia, where some Ministry of Information indoctrinates citizens that what they’re experiencing isn’t actually happening.

Flaws in the system aside, there are still consequences when one breaks the law. Not severe enough according to some, too severe for others. We’ve softened some consequences with drug court and the like, but it still stands that if you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime.

If you later become enlightened as to the error of your ways, with the backhanded gift of hindsight, well, bravo.

But enlightenment does not grant absolution. Time served does not create a slate cleaned. Felons do not have an easy go of it in society, an especially tragic outcome for the very young, who’ve not yet had a real shot at life, and all it has

Milpas on the MoveConsequencesby Sharon Byrne

Opinion, stories, events, and people that shape Santa Barbarasbview.com

Sharon Byrne

Sharon Byrne is exec-utive director for the Milpas Community Association, and cur-rently serves on the Advisory Boards for the Salvation Army Hospi-tality House and Santa Barbara County Alcohol and Drug Problems.

sbview.com

The most current Harbor Master Plan. Perhaps it’s time for a revision?

Loretta Redd

Loretta Redd’s diverse background includes being a psychologist, business own-er, non-profit director, Air Force officer, writer, speaker, and executive coach. Loretta has served on several Santa Barbara city committees and has been a candidate for public office.

sbview.com

to offer. Some fight the system when their kid

gets caught up in it. Some work positively with kids, to try to prevent them from doing things that will haunt them for years to come.

Some have to hit rock bottom before they get it, sadly.

To those who vandalized our neighborhood: wake up, and make a turn in the road now, before you find you’ve gone too far to get back.

You might discover too late that the consequences are just not worth it.

Update: Tuesday night, just after I finished this column, a young man was murdered on the Eastside, at Carrillo and Olive. Neighbors heard four shots fired. That’s really close to the high school.

The police (at the time this went to print) have not yet said whether it’s gang related. I alerted everyone involved in the Milpas Community Association on the Eastside, and my neighbors in West Downtown. My thanks to John Palminteri for calling me immediately on it, and to Rodger Dodger at EdHat for keeping me up to date. We’re all safer if everyone’s eyes are open, we’re watching out for each other, and reporting suspicious activities.

If it turns out to be gang-related, well, the signals were certainly there. Either way, someone lost his life to a shooting, something that’s a rarity in these parts. It’s sad any way you look at it.

Safe Harbor, No Moreby Loretta Redd

There is a confluence of factors rapidly changing both the look of the

Waterfront and that of the Funk Zone. But two things they seem to have in common are (1) the City’s desire to raise money for its coffers, and (2) the gradual determination to turn Santa Barbara’s coastline into Disneyland.

With the forthcoming arrival of twenty-three cruise ships, the City seems bent on supporting the gentrification and polishing of Santa Barbara’s pristine image. Some of the changes are for the better, benefitting more than just the cruise ship shore-leave day traders, but other proposals and pressures impact the small but valued working class of our city.

In both the Funk Zone near Cabrillo Boulevard and along the Haley-Gutierrez corridor, tasting rooms are replacing auto repair shops so fast, I’d say we’re lubricating more with Merlot than with motor oil.

There has always been a dynamic tension between landlords looking for higher rents and service industries just trying to find a space to do their trade in

this tawny town. Even accounting for smaller passenger

cruise ships, the potential fiscal impact of 40,000 tourist shoppers is hard not to cater to. But should temporary tourist dollars be what drives the policies of our city, especially if it makes life more difficult and expensive for its working-class residents?

Take the Waterfront for instance, described on the City’s website as “Santa Barbara’s #1 attraction.” There’s a push from the City to have the Harbor Commissioners alter the long-term vehicle storage regulations because of the “visual blight” and “public perception that camping and vehicle storage is allowed.”

This is where various issues get convoluted, and as with most things governmental, there isn’t a simple solution. Besides the hourly parking, there are two types of parking permits at the Waterfront: the $95 per year General permit, and the $70 per year Slipholder permit. The Slipholder permit is also sold to Waterfront business owners and those who are mooring.

Everyone except the Slipholders are held to a maximum stay of 72 hours at a time.

Granted, some of the vehicles in the harbor lot are decrepit (although they seem to be disappearing quickly), but some belong to guys who work to repair the boats or fish the seas. I don’t know if you’ve ever owned a boat, but it’s similar to owning an automobile; they require


pretty constant maintenance.Many of these repair guys and hull-

cleaning divers keep their tools and equipment in their vehicles in order to have their ‘shop’ close to the water. Can you imagine if the mechanics at the Santa Barbara Auto Group had to keep their tools at La Cumbre Plaza? And much like the businesses in the Funk Zone and Haley corridor, none of the vessel repair guys are exactly rolling in the dough... but they do provide a service, and they are residents of our city.

Waterfront parking is a cash cow for the City, no doubt. According to a slide presentation, the number of days at “full capacity” for Harbor parking has increased by 300% since 2008. In part, this is due to the popularity of the restaurants, retailers, Museum, Yacht Club and breakwater walkway. The increase in parking demand is also from City College students who have figured out that occasional, short-term parking just across the street from their campus costs less than semester-long passes.

There are issues beyond the tidal waves of cars to park or cruise line tourists to accommodate. It is past time for the City to have a public conversation about the Waterfront, similar to one done for a similar community back in 2005, titled “The Impact of Cruise Ship Industry on Life in Key West.” This report looked at all aspects from charter and commercial fishing and pollution and turbidity to retail sales, taxes and the effect on affordable housing.

As for Santa Barbara, I couldn’t find a more recent Harbor Master Plan than 1996, so this could be a good time to rewrite one. For instance citing page 64, under Fiscal Considerations, “In 1984, the City Council adopted policies relating to Harbor leases. These policies have the underlying goal of having the Waterfront be self-supporting. The State Tidelands Grant requires that all the money raised in the tidelands be spent in that area...”

Now if that is still true, and the City wants to ‘pretty up’ our working Harbor, I would suggest they provide free or low cost storage lockers for those small and independent businesses who take care of the real needs of the ocean-going vessels. Anyone who lives on their vessel doesn’t have the luxury of a home or garage in which to store their belongings.

Recently, the Harbor Patrol has been coming down on the live-aboards for any minor infraction of having ‘unpermitted’ belongings sitting on the docks. I understand wanting to keep the new docks clean and neat, but I’m told by some that the warnings feel suddenly “arbitrary and unjustified... like they’re trying to get rid of us.” Can you imagine if the City declared that all residents had to park their car inside their garages?

The City has its own boatyard with storage for its equipment, and there are lockers near the Condor Express for

paddleboats and canoes, so I don’t think well designed storage lockers are a Coastal Commission violation. Of course, the City staff suggests that anyone in need of storage facilities simply rent a unit at the A-American Self-Storage on Calle Cesar Chavez, or pay another hundred or so bucks a month to store their vehicles over by McCormix.

Back to the ancient, yet most current Harbor Master Plan:

“The primary and secondary goals are to provide essential supplies and services to the boating public and to raise optimum revenue to assist in the operation and maintenance of the Harbor to reduce the need for all costs to be borne by the boating public.

The third and fourth goals are to provide passive recreational opportunities and an aesthetic Waterfront for the enjoyment of the general public and to provide an opportunity for non-profit marine oriented individuals or organizations to use the Harbor.” (pg 64)

It would appear that at least in 1996, the boaters came first, while ‘aesthetics’ followed. Our current City website declares Santa Barbara will “provide the community with a quality Waterfront for recreation and commercial use, along with mooring and landside services for boating activities.”

It doesn’t say anything about how those commercial businesses are supposed to continue to exist when the Waterfront Department of the city seems determined to turn a working harbor into another snotty Newport Beach. What’s next, a dress code for fishermen and repair guys... or will we simply price them all out of the harbor like we’re accomplishing in the Funk Zone?

Business Beatby Ray Estrada

Although an update probably will be needed again before summer, it’s time for yet another look at the ongoing saga of the State Street commercial real estate scene, which has been long considered a barometer for the South Coast economy.

Late winter 2013 finds the State Street corridor a mixed bag of comings and goings.

Perhaps the newest addition to the downtown scene will be the upcoming opening of the Core Power Yoga studio in what used to be a restaurant at 1129 State Street. The studio is tucked away in a courtyard with a fountain behind Peet’s Coffee & Tea at 1131 State Street. It’s been some five years since anything occupied the spot where Core Power Yoga is to inhabit.

State Street again has its share of vacant storefronts, ranging from the three Territory Ahead retail shops and corporate headquarters to the corner retail property vacated by Santa Barbara Outfitters and prAna.

A couple of rug shops finally departed.

One made way for a soon-to-open Brazilian Arts Café to what soon will be an independent bookshop on the 1200 block of State Street. And, at 1226 State, the Metropolitan Art & Literature shop quietly replaced Ultimate Bagels, which used to serve the cheapest meal in the area.

Nearby, the first independent bookstore in 20 years, Granada Books, is set to open in June, said co-owner Sharon Hoshida. She said she has been working on the 3,300-square-foot shop for the last 18 months.

Another rug shop at 1117 State has relocated at 410 Olive Street.

Alas, La Arcada on the 100 block of State Street has been hit with the loss of East Beach Wine Co., which closed just after the first of the year. Owner David Cable moved from lower Milpas Street a couple of years ago, but never could draw many folks to his daily wine tastings.

Interestingly, a block over on Chapala Street, the Winehound shop left for greener pastures at La Cumbre Plaza.

On the 900 block of State Street, the Neapolitan Persona Pizza shop has moved into the space once occupied by the Taj East Indian restaurant.

On the 700 block of State, the symbol for Pi hangs over a long-dormant storefront across the street from what soon will be the Brat Haus, another in a succession of eateries to occupy what was the Snack Shop a few months ago.

Not far away remains a vacancy at 714 State, which last was occupied by the Mimosa French restaurant. And, at the corner of Ortega and State streets sits the former Left at Albuquerque, while plans still call for it to be transformed into a Panera Bread shop.

Meanwhile, after more than a few years of vacancy, the former Café Zia and ex-Esau’s spots remain unoccupied. And the former Sharkeez Baja Cantina, 415 State St., is expected to sit still for a long while since its owner is incarcerated.

The State Street corridor includes a few more commercial properties that have come into play this year. The former Brown & Brown insurance building on the 1000 block of Chapala Street remains unoccupied this year. The new owner of the almost 6,000-square-foot space is asking $1.85 per square foot for a triple net lease, which includes rent, utilities and other services.

FRIDAY FEBRUARY 22 Locals Night Happy Hour 4pm-7pm

Featuring: Folsom & McLychok Acoustic Duo 4pm-7pm Jason Cambell and the Drive 8pm-11pm

SATURDAY FEBRUARY 23 Live Piano Featuring: Al Reese 4pm-7pm

SUNDAY FEBRUARY 24 New Orleans Style Jazz Featuring: Ulysses 1pm-4pm Karaoke Night 6pm-10pm Hosted by Will Brown

MONDAY FEBRUARY 25 Industry Night

TUESDAY FEBRUARY 26 Brian Kinsella’s Open Mic Night 7pm-10pm

WEDNESDAY FEBRUARY 27 All Night Happy Hour w/ M&M Featuring: Justin Claveria Jazz Trio 8pm-11pm

THURSDAY FEBRUARY 28 Ladies Night (half off all drinks)

Featuring: Brian Kinsella Band 8pm-11pm

FRIDAY MARCH 1 Locals Night Happy Hour 4pm-7pm

805-845-88003126 STATE ST

Ray Estrada

Ray Estrada is a writer, editor and media consul-tant who has worked for newspapers, radio news, wire services and online publications for the past 40 years. He has taught journalism at the Univer-sity of Southern California and now runs his own consulting business based in Santa Barbara.

sbview.com


A Jackson Pollock Pigeon Poop Conspiracy

W hether in Trafalgar Square, Central Park or old SB airport hangars, pigeons have swooped

and flocked in international aggregates for centuries, dropping random acts of guano guerrilla art all over whatever urban canvas happened to be beneath them. More recently, they’ve even entered into NFL infamy: Long-suffering Bengals fans have implored the football gods to bless their team and receive a head splat. Feral Pigeons have earned their places in local lore as well, dive-bombing unsuspecting pedestrians walking in Old Town crosswalks under traffic light poles.

For years, ornithologists have chronicled their behavior worldwide. The swoop, the steady aim, and the signature splat, all as they coo-coo:

“Expose yourself to art.”

The Missing LinkWith so much guano in the air, some

feathered muse cross-fertilized Goleta Girl’s brain recently, triggering a neuron’s synaptic jump so radical, so farfetched, so dramatic that it kneecapped her in the middle of Trader Joe’s parking lot. (Terrible parking lot, by the way.) She had just parked her car and exited when suddenly she registered identity and recognized patterns from what were previously just blobs of asphalt guano. And much as you might see the face of Jesus in a three-cheese pizza, she saw not squished bird excrement – au contraire – but instead miraculous mimetic homages to Jack the Dripper.

Here, right here on the TJ’s parking lot, was incontrovertible evidence of the artistic link between Jackson Pollock and edgy, artistic pigeons: A drip-and-splash method of painting as well as parallel composition, energy, placement and technique. The artist-pigeon relationship was even evident where paint dropped

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onto a horizontal canvas by one correlated with guano forcefully dropped on a hard surface by the other. Famous Pollock works such as “Autumn Rhythm” or “No. 5” jumped out of what had been mere ghost images of dung.

As Goleta Girl photographed for posterity these homilies to abstract expressionism, she realized the very real possibility that Pollock’s work had not only inspired the guerrilla guano practitioners but that the legendary pigeons of Central Park had inspired and influenced Pollock’s development of his drip and drab method of action painting.

Hmmm. Pollock did live in New York.Was such a thing possible? Could sky

rats have inspired America’s greatest abstract expressionist? Is this what people mean when they say, “art imitating crap imitating art?”

“Well, why not? said Steve Boyajian, 56, a Santa Barbara Museum of Modern Art security officer. “We don’t know where the artist gets his influence.”

“What an influence,” he said, “from the simple to the sublime.”

Poetry from a Museum security guard. Thank you, Steve, thank you very much.

Feel the Love (Or Pigeons Can Give You the Clap)

Throughout history, the Rock Dove, aka Rock Pigeon, aka Feral Pigeon has garnered such endearing epithets as sky rat, feathered rat, rat with wings, gutter bird or flying ashtray, as they have oft-revealed their propensity to not just roost in inconvenient locations but also to drop their guano gifts on anything from Rodin’s The Thinker or Cleopatra’s Needle to Goleta Cemetery headstones.

Who has not enjoyed a sky rat’s signature at one time or another upon his person? Goleta Girl has a friend so honored at his college commencement. Few subjects beyond politics or sex can evoke such emotional response as pigeons, be it absolute adoration or rabid contempt from even the most hardened Caspar Milquetoast. Everyone has an opinion about pigeons.

“Pigeons are worthless. They are flying rats,” Robin Cook, owner of Hot Shots Pest Control says. “I have no sympathy for them. They can hurt you in a way you don’t want to be hurt.” He explains that pigeons’ droppings and nesting materials

can cause serious human health risks – Histoplasmosis, West Nile Virus, or even Psittacosis (Chlamydia psittaci.)

Let me say that again. Pigeons can give you Chlamydia.

Nasty little beasts.Robin explained that some people have

acquired Chlamydia by walking barefoot in grass and just stepping in bird poo. They wipe their feet off but between not between their toes where health risk factors can be absorbed. Further, airborne dried fecal matter can cause disease when breathed.

“When a husband or wife goes to the doctor and find out they have Chlamydia, they blame their partner.”

‘What did you do?’ ‘I did nothing.’ Then a divorce.” Cook said.

Collateral DamageGuano doesn’t just break up marriages,

though. It can be costly and expensive too. Cook remembers one incident where a roof collapsed because the buildup of pigeon excrement was so heavy. The uric acid it contains is highly corrosive, and roosting debris can back up gutters, damage rooftops and get into air conditioning units. The droppings will slowly or sometimes quickly damage materials if not remediated.

“A gallon of water weighs eight pounds. A gallon of droppings weighs eighty pounds,” Cook said.

Traditionally, airports are also popular pigeon habitats.

“Birds and airplanes don’t mix well,” said Tracy Lincoln, 53, Santa Barbara Airport operations manager. While pigeons were problematic in the past, Lincoln said they have experienced a reduction of pigeon numbers at the airport. He recalls how they used to roost often in the old buildings on the north side of Hollister across from the Elephant Bar because the buildings weren’t properly boarded up at the time. He estimated the last pigeon strike was about a decade ago although other species of birds have caused subsequent strikes.

“A bird strike will take an entire engine out,” Lincoln said. “This has been an issue in aviation since people began to fly. It is now more of an issue with jets than propellers. A plane can ingest one into its engine and have the engine flame out.”

He explained that the airport has ...continued p.19

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Santa Barbara Airport Opera-tions Manager Tracy Lincoln doesn’t think much of pigeons.


Nicole Lantagne Welch, who guided the University of Miami (Florida) women’s volleyball

program to five NCAA Tournaments, one Sweet 16 and 243 wins over 12 seasons, was named head coach of the UC Santa Barbara program last week and will be introduced at a press conference Thursday.

Lantagne Welch, who steered the Hurricanes to each of the last four NCAA Tournaments, was named Atlantic Coast Conference Coach and AVCA East Region Coach of the Year in 2012, after her team went 25-6 overall and won a school record 17 games in ACC play. She also earned both honors following the 2008 season. Additionally, five of her players were named All-East Region in 2012, a school record and tied for the most nationally.

“I am extremely excited for this opportunity and am looking forward to challenging in the Big West and nationally,” Lantagne Welch said. “It was going to take a special situation to take me away from Miami and UCSB is one of those special situations.”

A native of Encinitas, California, Lantagne Welch became head coach at Miami in 2001 and restarted a program that had been on a 20-year hiatus. She immediately started building a winner and, in fact, coached the team to the NCAA Sweet 16 in just her second season. In all, 10 of Lantagne Welch’s teams posted winning records and six eclipsed the 20-win mark.

Her team’s accomplishments in the classroom are just as impressive as they are on the court. During Lantagne Welch’s tenure as head coach, Miami had a 100% graduation rate. Her team’s fall grade point average in 2012 was 3.30 and its overall GPA was 3.14. Finally, the Hurricane’s Academic Progress Rate (APR) of 995 earned them a Public Recognition Award from the NCAA.

“Nicole is a great fit,” said UCSB Director of Intercollegiate Athletics Mark Massari. “At our first meeting she presented an impressive ‘Plan for the Gauchos’ and I was sold. As an established coach she knows exactly how to build a program and where we want to go. On behalf of the University, we are excited for Nicole to lead our storied program and to welcome her home.”

Lantagne Welch began her coaching

career in 1994 as an assistant coach on the staff of her alma mater, Maryland. In 1995, she became a graduate assistant coach at Ohio University. Lantagne Welch arrived at Miami after serving as an assistant coach at Texas A&M. During her three seasons there, the Aggies ranked in the top 20 and qualified for the NCAA Tournament each season (1997-99). In 1999, Texas A&M advanced to the elite eight of the NCAA Tournament, compiling a 28-6 record and finished the year ranked ninth in the nation.

Also a highly successful player at the University of Maryland (College Park), Lantagne Welch finished her illustrious career as the school’s all-time leader in assists, digs, and matches. She was an All-ACC honoree three times, including First Team nods in her junior and senior seasons when she also served as team captain. She was named to the ACC’s 50th Anniversary Team for the 1990s. As a high school athlete in Encinitas, she gained an AAA beach rating.

Lantagne Welch grew up in a family where volleyball was a major part of their livelihood. Her parents, Joe and JoAnn, owned and operated a highly regarded volleyball scouting service that evaluated high school players, covering the regions of California, Nevada and Arizona. Lantagne Welch’s sister, Jenelle Duvall,

was an All-American at the University of Pittsburgh and served as an assistant coach at Northern Arizona and Northern Illinois. She also served as head coach at Metro State College of Denver.

Lantagne Welch also had a connection with UCSB even before becoming its head volleyball coach: her late grandfather Joseph coached the Gaucho baseball team in 1949 and was a longtime professor in the Department of Health and Physical Education. He served as the chair of the department from 1956-62 and 1965-66. He retired in 1974 as a Professor Emeritus.

In 2002, she married Wesley Paul Welch of Denver City, Texas, in her hometown of Encinitas. On Dec. 7, 2004, the couple celebrated the birth of their daughter, Riley Jaye and on April 8, 2007, son Ayden Fletcher was born.

Lantagne Welch takes over the program from the legendary Kathy Gregory, who retired in January after a tremendous 38-year career that saw Gaucho teams amass 882 wins and 27 appearances in

the NCAA Tournament – including the first 26 in a row. Gregory’s teams also advanced to three Elite Eights and two other Sweet 16s.

Lantagne Welch is the second sitting head coach hired by UCSB in the past year, joining six-time Western Athletic Conference Coach of the Year Simon Thibodeau who joined the Gaucho women’s tennis program after nine years at Fresno State.

Chargers Grind Out a 2nd-Round CIF Win Over Elsinoreby Barry Punzal

Fourth-seeded Elsinore learned that you don’t want to get into a grind-it-

out basketball game against Dos Pueblos.The Chargers are masters of playing

a gritty, half-court game. They played it Tuesday night and pulled out a 49-48 victory in the second round of the CIF Division 2A playoffs at Sovine Gym.

Dos Pueblos (17-9) advances to Friday’s quarterfinals, where it will play at Tesoro in Orange County.

Dos Pueblos, which this season has won 13 games when it holds a team under 50 points, played a tight zone defense against the Tigers (21-8), making it difficult for them to get into an offensive flow.

“I told them the further you want to go [in the playoffs], you have to play defense,” DP coach Joe Zamora said. “The offense is going to come. We’re basketball players, we can score, but if we can hold teams in that forty range we can be successful.”

After leading by just one (39-38) after three quarters, the Chargers built a 49-41 lead with 3:29 to go in the game. Gerry Perez stole the ball and fed Cruz Mertens for a layup to put DP up by eight.

Elsinore would fight back. Tommy Wilson hit a 3-pointer from the top of

the key, Deven Riley made a pair of free throws and Reynaldo Solorzano scored on a second effort to make it a one-point game, 49-48, with 1:32 to go in regulation.

Dos Pueblos had a couple of possessions to create some breathing room. On the first one, Perez was called for an offensive foul. Zach Shugart stole the ball to give the Chargers another opportunity. Chris Williams dribbled off 25 seconds before calling a time out. When play resumed, Shugart drove in the lane and got off a shot that rolled around the rim and fell out.

Elsinore got the rebound and pushed the ball up court. Preston Beverly drove the lane and fed Allan Stubbs, whose layup attempt fell off the rim. The Tigers scrambled to retrieve the rebound with 11 seconds to go and called time out. Riley got the inbound pass and fed Stubbs, who drove to the basket but couldn’t convert. CJ Zajic grabbed the rebound as time ran out.

DP students rushed the floor to celebrate with the last playoff survivor from the Channel League.

“They did get a look, but our guys finished the defense like we asked them to by getting the defensive rebound, and that was a big thing for us,” said Zamora.

Mertens led DP with 18 points, including four 3-pointers in the first half (three in a row in the second quarter), that helped the Chargers take a 33-28 halftime lead.

Mertens showed that he’s fully recovered from an ankle injury he suffered during the second round of Channel League play.

“He’s close to one hundred percent and now the confidence is there,” Zamora said. “Tonight, I have to give it up to him. He did some great things defensively. He really stepped up when he needed to.”

“I’m just trying my hardest,” said Mertens, who is in the playoffs for the first time in his DP career.

Zach Shugart hit a pair of 3s and finished with 11 points and seven rebounds.

But it was the points and the defense

Presidio Sports is a provider of local sports news and information for the

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Welch Named Head Coach of UCSB Volleyball

Taylor Formico will be returning for the Gauchos after a season in which she earned Big West Freshman of the Year while also making the First Team with teammate Leah Sully.

DP’s leading scorer Cruz Mertens.

by Barry Punzal


from the grinders who made this victory possible for DP. CJ Zajic pounded his way inside and got to the free-throw line, where he scored six points. He also grabbed seven rebounds. Devon Ray came off the bench and scored four of his seven points during an 11-0 run in the last 1:30 of the second quarter to rally the Chargers from seven-point deficit; Perez tallied four points and Erik Olsen came off the bench to hit a big 3-pointer to start the fourth quarter.

Zajic and Ray also did a solid job defensively on Elsinore’s standout post player Solorzano in the second half. He scored just six points in the second half and two in the fourth quarter.

“We put a little more body pressure on him,” Zamora said. “CJ and Devon did a great job on him. We did a little bit of switching. We were able to take away what he wanted to do.”

Riley, a high jumping 6-2 forward, scored 18 points for Elsinore, and Solorzano finished with 16.

“I’m proud of our Charger players,” Zamora said. ” We said we wanted our defense to be our offense, and tonight our defense stepped up.”

NEWS BRIEFSCIF Releases Preseason Rankings For Spring Sports

The CIF on Monday released preseason polls for boys volleyball, baseball and

softball.The Channel League boys volleyball

teams are competing in Division 2 this year. Santa Barbara is the highest ranked local team at No. 3; Dos Pueblos is sixth and San Marcos is listed among others. Oak Park sits at the No. 1 spot.

Laguna Blanca is ranked No. 2 in Division 5 and Cate is No. 6. Saddleback Valley Christian is the top-ranked team.

In baseball, the only local team to receive a preseason ranking is Cate at No. 3 in Division 7.

Dos Pueblos is ranked fourth in Division 4 softball.

CIF releases rankings each Monday

during the regular season.UCLA vs. UCSB Baseball Game Rescheduled After Rain Out

The Gauchos will host the two-time defending Pac-12 champions on Tuesday, February 26 after their original date was washed out. The Bruins are ranked as high as No. 6 in two prominent national polls released this week. UCSB won 2-of-3 at Fresno State in their season-opening series.

Before UCLA, the Gauchos host the University of San Francisco for a four-game weekend series with a double-header on Saturday.

Local Deal From Boathouse Supports Surfrider Foundation

The Boathouse Restaurant in Santa Barbara is currently offering a swell deal for local diners.

The Boathouse has selected the Santa Barbara Chapter of the Surfrider Foundation to benefit from its February offer with CentralCoastDining.com and will devote 10 percent of the proceeds to the local charity.

The Boathouse supports Surfrider’s dedication to the preservation of the coastline and beach protection, including Hendry’s Beach where the restaurant is located.

A limited number of packages, each of which costs just $40 for an $80 dining credit, are available for purchase on CentralCoastDining.com through February 25.

Surfrider Foundation was founded in 1984 and the Santa Barbara Chapter was founded in 1992 by Rob Puddicombe, Anna Bass and others.

The local chapter has dedicated itself to fighting for the preservation of the Gaviota Coast.

Sports Calendar

Santa Barbara High’s baseball team will honor Simon Chavez before its

2013 season opener on Tuesday, Feb. 26 at Eddie Mathews Field.

Chavez, who played for the Dons

Santa Barbara High’s top-ranked girls water polo team faced Newport Harbor on Wednesday night for a chance to play in Saturday’s CIF championship in Irvine. The Dons have yet to lose in 2013, having won 20-straight games. The program has won eight CIF titles with the last one coming in 2006. Check PresidioSports.com for updates on the Dons.

Simon Chavez will be honored at Tuesday’s baseball game at Santa Barbara High. (photo: James Sinclair)

and stayed in the baseball program after graduation as a coach for the freshman and junior varsity club teams and the regular season JV squad, died from injuries suffered in a hit-and-run accident on Hwy. 101 on Jan. 15. He was 22 years old.

“He was a really good kid,” Santa Barbara coach Fred Warrecker said.

Simon’s parents, Ana and Luis, will throw out the first pitch prior to the Dons’ game against Pioneer Valley.

Other events worth checking out:

FRIDAY, FEB. 22SOCCER: L.A. Galaxy vs. Colorado Rapids, 7:30pm, Harder Stadium – The two-time defending champions of Major League Soccer play their final tune-up before the start of the new season against Western Division rival Colorado. A 5:30pm preliminary game features UCSB against the Rapids Reserves. Tickets are $12 for adults and $8 for

children 4-13.BASEBALL:USF at UCSB, 2pm – The Gauchos open a four-game series against the Dons at Caesar Uyesaka Stadium. The teams play a doubleheader on Saturday and a single game on Sunday.

SATURDAY, FEB. 23MEN’S BASKETBALL: Sacramento State at UCSB, 7pm – Gauchos take a break from Big West play and face the Hornets in a mid-major BracketBusters game.

WATER POLO:CIF Finals – Santa Barbara could be playing for its ninth girls title at the Woolett Aquatic Center in Irvine.Girls Basketball: CIF Semifinals – Santa Barbara High and Providence Hall hope to be playing in their

division final four.

SUNDAY, FEB. 24RUNNING:Roses en la Playa 5k, Leadbetter Beach, 9am – This is an out-and-back Santa Barbara Athletic Association Grand Prix race at the beach. Post-race activities at Leadbetter Beach.

SURFING:The Rincon Classic is in its waiting period. If conditions cooperate, the Queen of the Coast will be contested. Check RinconClassic.com for confirmation.

TUESDAY, FEB. 26COLLEGE BASEBALL:UCLA at UCSB, 2pm – The Gauchos play the No. 6 Bruins at Caesar Uyesaka Stadium. The game was originally scheduled for last week but was postponed due to rain. UCLA has won two-straight Pac-12 titles.

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Girl About Town Ms Bifano is drawn to micro-fiction and is currently

writing her first novel – “The Grace Below.” She has a B.A. in English with an emphasis in writing from the University of San Francisco and a M.F.A. in Creative Writing, also from the University of San Francisco. More of Julie’s stories and poetry can be viewed on her website juliebifano.com.

with Julie Bifano

Santa Barbara Moms in Motion

Fitness Queen Whitney Bruice (with hat) cele-brates another Moms In Motion triumph with MIM Founder Jamie Allison.

The Santa Barbara

Moms In Motion

Tri-team. Looking fit, ladies, and

fit is it!

All around town, I’ve often noticed women wearing cheery bright pink and berry red floral tank

tops. I saw them for the first time at Night Moves a couple summers ago. I remember it distinctly.

Since then, I’ve observed these energetic ladies hopping on their bikes and getting a fresh start to an early morning Saturday, jumping in the ocean to swim or just running (literally) around town. Who were the festively dressed female athletes I had repeatedly seen? After a little research, I learned this was a group in town called Moms in Motion.

I had the opportunity to learn more about Moms in Motion by meeting with Founder Jamie Allison. She explained, “Moms in Motion provides fitness teams for women integrating fun, fitness and philanthropy all in one supportive environment.” I learned Jamie started Moms in Motion as a grassroots fitness group here in Santa Barbara, and that it has since become a nation-wide phenomenon.

The Secret Ingredients Spoiler Alert: Children Are not one of them

Jamie shared how difficult it was for her friends to make time for fitness, friends and outreach, yet they universally wished they could figure out a way to get it all in. As a mom herself, Jamie knew well that every minute counts, and she had the vision to combine those three ingredients in Moms in Motion. After just three summers, Jamie had 200 members and realized she had tapped into a niche.

Incidentally, it turns out that 20% of Moms in Motion members are not actually …Moms. They don’t have children. In other words, Jamie had discovered a platform that worked for busy women across board, and had organically grown a program where women could come together around fitness, meet new friends, and give back to their community.

Moms in Motion members can sign up for fitness groups that may include hiking, running, cycling, triathlon training or core fitness. These groups change seasonally, so throughout the year members have the opportunity to try a different sport. Each group trains together for 8 – 14 weeks, with sessions ending in a race or competition or other culminating event. “This is a celebration of their fitness journey,” Jamie said of the final competition.

She also explained the important social element of the groups. After a ride, before going back to wearing the many hats women and mothers wear, the group will often go for a coffee or chat. Half of the cycling group training presently will ride in the upcoming Solvang Half Century on March 9, 2013.

Whitney BruiceWhips ‘Em Into Shape

I had the opportunity to talk to Whitney Bruice, the leader of this year’s cycling group. Her extensive athletic background includes coaching the Moms in Motion Santa Barbara Triathlon team for the past six years. (I hear she even trained Editor-in-Chief Matt Mazza’s wife, Wendi.) Last year was her first year coaching the cycling team for Moms in Motion. 14 ladies meet every Saturday morning at 7:45am and ride for 20 – 40 miles. (They are at all different levels and ages, so individuals can stop at 20 miles if they aren’t comfortable with longer distances.) Pit stops and water and snack

breaks are also a part of the Saturday ride. “The ladies are great,” Bruice told me,

“it’s always fun to meet new motivated women in town that want to get out there and keep their life balanced.”

We also discussed how cycling members get the chance to explore areas of Santa Barbara they might not typically explore. Routes have included: Gobernador Canyon in Carpinteria, Mission Canyon, Glen Annie, Mountain Drive, Winchester Canyon and Hope Ranch Annex, just to name a few.

What’s Next?The future for Moms in Motion looks

bright. Moms in Motion is partnering with Digifit (a comprehensive health & fitness tracking application) and expanding into a corporate wellness solution with a community outreach program. The goal will be to reduce health care costs, while improving employee productivity and camaraderie. Recently, Jamie and Digifit CEO Dean Hovey, met with the Department of Health and Human Services in Washington, D.C. to discuss a new government fitness and nutrition initiative to support moms with children between the ages 1 – 5.

Looks like we will see more and more Moms in Motion integrating fitness into their busy lives. And hey, after learning about the group, I decided to join!

For more information check out momsinmotion.com, or email [email protected].

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engaged in a lot of bird control activity as well as employed trained tower and ground staff to warn pilots about bird sightings. Behavior modification, removal and remediation as well as various devices such as netting, ledge products, trapping and moving predator effigies are among their weapons. The airport also has posted no-feeding-the-birds warnings. Falcons are another option in pigeon mitigation since they prey on them.

Apparently, airport consensus about pigeons is not favorable.

“Pigeons are a nuisance,” said Lincoln. “Sky rat is pretty accurate. It’s just not a clean animal.”

Here Comes the Pigeon Lobby (Yawn)

However, others feel the birds have been unfairly pigeonholed as the lowest

creatures in the hierarchical pecking order of the winged kingdom.

“City pigeons have a bad rap,” said Joan Lentz, a naturalist, author, teacher and bird expert.

“They don’t bother me. They have a close association with man, trained for homing pigeons, racing pigeons and used for food. “

“They are scapegoats for just doing what they’re supposed to do,” she said. “They’re pretty law-abiding… they’re just messy.”

Beauty Is In the Eye of the Beholder

And so we return to Goleta Girl’s supposition that it was pigeon poop that inspired Jackson Pollock. Imagine. Imagine if Goleta Girl’s revelation proves true. Oh how it would rock the tenants of the Pollock-Krasner Foundation, headlining the storied pages of Artforum. It would quickly demand a thorough exhumation and rewrite of Pollock’s artistic cannon.

Imagine...“I have never heard of it [Pollock being

influenced by pigeons and droppings]” said Mark Winter, 63, director of Art Experts Inc. in Daytona Beach, Florida.

“But when we talk about Jackson Pollock’s drip painting... it is not too far away from your pigeon droppings. Something that is going down through the air is going to splash and splatter when it hits the surface. Pollock was famous because he developed these techniques to apply (and control) the paint so it was not

...continued from 15

SBA has taken extreme measures to protect against pigeon-related accidents. No more small kids feeding the sky rats near the runways...

Jana’s JourneysBe there or be… well, pear with gourmet done fresh when the Goleta Valley

Community Center partners with the Local Artisans Market to offer homemade goodies and gourmet artisan foods. The market starts on Saturday, February 23, at Goleta Valley Community Center and goes from 10 am to 2 pm. It is made up of local food artisans, cottage foods, farmers, food trucks and local artists and crafters. Should be good.

A ll those meteor crashes got you wondering? Well, listen up when Preston Dennett presents a lecture about UFOs with a wide variety of cases from his research into

their history. For example, did you realize California has more UFO sightings than any other state? Did you know the 1965 New York blackout was caused by UFOs? The lecture will be held at Center of the Heart, 487 North Turnpike Road at 7 pm on Saturday, February 23. Cost is $10.

Learn about blowing horns in the “History of Brass Instruments” from the UCSB Maurice Faulkner Brass Quintet and Horn Choir. Director Dr. Steven Gross will

speak about the history of brass instruments with demonstrations performed by the UCSB scholarship brass quintet and horn ensemble. Music will range from Bach to the present. The free lecture-demonstration will be held on Sunday, February 24, at 2 pm, in the Goleta Valley Library (500 North Fairview Avenue).

Pause and wonder at Appoggiatura, a preview production of a new play by James Still presented by UCSB’s Launch Pad, a residency and performance program.

UCSB faculty artists, students and performers perform in this play about an American family finding itself by completely losing itself in Italy. The play preview production begins a limited run beginning Thursday, February 28 at 8 pm, at UCSB’s Hatlen Theater. Tickets are $17 general, $13 students, seniors, UCSB staff and faculty. For more information call 805-893-7221.

simply drip and drop and scatter... what looks like a random effect was to a large degree controlled.

“What we learn from your pigeons is that pigeon liquid contains a certain consistent thickness. When it reaches the pavement or your car, it will splatter in

ways that when Jackson Pollock splattered paint and liberated it on the canvas, people found it artistic.

“So the question is, then, when the pigeons do their own drops, is this something that people will (also) find artistic?” queried Winter astutely.


H ailing from New Jersey I am no stranger to urban myths. I’m not sure why, but the place is just lousy

with them. In fact, there is a magazine called Weird N.J (weirdnj.com) that devotes itself exclusively to the Garden State’s urban legends. It even touts itself as “Your Travel Guide To New Jersey’s Local Legends And Best Kept Secrets.”

I’ll admit that when I was little, the stories the “big kids” told kept me up nights, as I compulsively checked and double-checked under my bed and in my closet for the likes of The Jersey Devil. The “devil,” a cryptid (look it up), had been described as a kangaroo-like creature with the head of a goat, leathery bat-like wings, horns, small arms with clawed hands, cloven hooves and a forked tail. Although said to lurk and feed in the distant and ominous Pine Barrens of southern New Jersey, I desperately feared running into the thing when I got up in the night to pee or while making a midnight run to the kitchen for Oreos.

Today, for me, Santa Barbara offers its own version of urban or rather sub-urban legends. Equally scary and disturbing, these myths take the form of horticultural horrors, botanical “bizarrities” and gardening ghoulishness. Allow me to explore, explain and try to shed light on the eerie and unexplained phenomena that I’ve witnessed in the gardens and landscapes of our Southern Californian paradise.

Oh, I almost forgot:The views expressed below are those of

the author (me) and do not reflect the official opinion, position or policy of the Santa Barbara Sentinel. (I just added this because it looks official and because I’m

pretty sure that I’m right about most of this stuff because I made it all up.)

The MythIn the summer, do not water your lawn

or other garden plants during the heat of the day. The drops of water will magnify the sun resulting in burned grass and foliage.

My TakeThis is a gardening story that I’ve heard

on more than a few occasions. A lot like that elusive Loch Ness monster, there’s

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“Mr. Greenjeans,” as he is known around Santa Barbara, is a gardener, horticulturist and writer. He particularly enjoys working with roses, orchids and sharing the day with his golden retriever Peaches, who faithfully accompanies him in the field. Contact him at [email protected]

by Randy Arnowitz

In the Garden withMr. Greenjeans

Obconica primroses (Primula obconica) show their true colors when given bright shade and a bark mulch.

This dude knows that watering in the heat of the day in full sun does not result in burned foliage. Best to water early or later in the day though, to avoid excess evaporation.

More Gardening Myths, Mysteries and Sub-Urban Legends: Fact or Fiction

always been a lot of talk but no real evidence. Personally, I’ve never witnessed it and if you think about it logically, in nature, it does sometimes occur that after a summer rain, the sun reappears bright and strong. This does not result in burned up lawns and gardens.

The only reason not to water in the heat of the day is because much of the water will be wasted due to evaporation before it soaks down to the plant roots. Personally, I set my irrigation timers to begin their cycles in the early morning. But that’s just because it’s cooler at that time.

The MythIt’s better to rake clean or blow down

garden beds to remove all traces of leaf litter, mulch and other organic matter, than to let it all accumulate.

My TakeNo, no, no, no, no. You’re killing me

here. Removing all the organic debris and raking out your garden beds within

an inch of their lives is a gardening phenomenon that has reached epidemic proportions.

Everywhere I look – okay, that’s an exaggeration. Almost everywhere I look in this town garden beds are raked clean. This goes against everything that Mother Nature is trying to do. Look to the forest. The leaves of deciduous leaves fall and make an insulating blanket of mulch that keeps the roots cool and evenly moist. This mulch is home to billions – okay, hundreds or at least a lot of organisms that help to break it down. It then becomes available to the plant as food. Of course, I’m simplifying this whole process. The point is that keeping the leaf and plant litter in your garden beds:

1. Keeps plant roots cool.2. Helps soil retain moisture.3. Prevents weeds from germinating

and makes them easier to pull.4. Provides slow-release nutrition for

the plants.5. Allows for better water absorption

and penetration with less run-off.

Randy’s Quick Pick

It’s ba-a-ack! The 68th International Santa Barbara

Orchid Show hits town on March 8-10 from 9am to 5pm at the Earl Warren Show Grounds. If you’re like me, you can never have too many orchids, so go early and stay late. If you haven’t been, there’s a large show area featuring fantastic displays of crazy orchids and then a separate sale tent. Good prices. Great plants!


6. By removing all the good stuff from your garden beds you are undoing and preventing nature from, as they say, taking its course.

The MythIt’s important to thin out and prune

citrus trees for better fruit production once a year.

My TakeMany times folks will ask me when is

the proper time to prune their citrus trees. In my experience, the only pruning that oranges, lemons, limes and other citrus

need is to remove any dead or diseased branches and stems. Also, if the trees are getting too tall to comfortably pick the fruit or are obstructing windows, doors or walkways you can tastefully and hopefully, artfully trim them back within bounds. No need to thin them out or up for that matter. Leaving a skirt of branches and foliage to grow close to the ground protects the trunk from sunburn damage.

Unlike deciduous fruit trees such as peach, nectarine, plum and apricot, citrus trees do not need annual pruning to promote fruit production.

Heard any good garden myths or legends lately? If you’d like to share them I’d love to hear about them.

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there? It’s safe, don’t worry, I have a few friends with offices in the building.”

She relaxed. Smiled warmly.“That is such a nice offer, I really

appreciate it.” She did. I could see it.“Here, take my card and let me know if

there is anything you need.”“It’s no problem,” I told her, “Merry

Christmas.”As she walked out the door and got into

her car, I looked down at her business card.

Mary Ellen Tiffany. Montecito Bank & Trust.

I looked up to see her waving goodbye.I smiled. I waved. And that was the

end of Mary Ellen Tiffany. For a few years, anyway.

Reconnected from Thousands of Miles Away

Much had changed by January 2012. I’d left the aforementioned firm, started a law practice and then closed it. I’d been traveling for months with Wendi and the kids. I’d been keeping a regular blog and writing a column for the Montecito Journal, and often received emails from readers in Santa Barbara and elsewhere asking lots of travel and other questions and offering words of encouragement or whatever.

I remember well that I was sitting in a hut somewhere on the northwest coast of Bali when I read a particularly thoughtful note asking all about our trip and whether it would be possible for a 62-year-old woman to do alone.

It was signed simply, Mary Ellen.I can’t say why, for sure, that December

2009 (or was it 2008?) exchange always stuck with me, but it did. And when I asked whether the Mary Ellen who sent the email was the same Mary Ellen whom I’d met all those years ago, she quickly replied that she was.

A friendship ensued.It’s a funny world, man, a small one.

One in which things sometimes, though not always, happen for reasons.

Months later, Mary Ellen and my wife and I sat around our dinner table, slowly digesting a beautiful risotto with asparagus, sipping Pinot Noir, talking and laughing about traveling and work and life. She relayed that traveling around the world was something she’d always dreamed of doing (she also told us that moving to California and learning to fly a kite were things she always dreamed of doing too, and that she had accomplished them both years ago). Then she paused, and she smiled.

And she let the cat out of the bag.Montecito Bank & Trust – responsible

local company that it is – had agreed to a sabbatical of sorts, one that would give Mary Ellen around six months to travel like she’d always dreamed.

Cue hugging. Cue laughter. A happy moment.

Another one with Mary Ellen that I won’t forget anytime soon.

A Wonderful Déjà VuOn Wednesday, February 20, I sat

waiting for Mary Ellen at Tre Lune on Coast Village Road. It was just before 10 am, and she was leaving out of LAX for Bangkok to begin her trip that very evening. Here’s what happened:

I sat alone, toward the back of the restaurant, nose buried deep in my iPhone, when the front door swung open hard and a middle-aged woman, quite cute, burst forth into the foyer.

She had a UPS package in one hand and a cell phone in the other, and she appeared troubled. Quite troubled indeed.

“What’s wrong, Mary Ellen?” I asked as she rushed to the table.

“Well, I… I just have so much to do and I don’t know if I should take the backpack

with wheels or the one I can actually carry and I can’t get my cell phone to work right and and and…”

She was flustered, talking quickly, with arms moving and head bobbing and feet tapping on the hardwood floor beneath her.

“Don’t worry, it will all get done and you’ll be on an airplane somewhere over the Pacific in a few hours. This is supposed to be fun, Mary Ellen, remember?”

She relaxed (mostly). Smiled warmly.“I know,” she said, “I’m excited and

nervous and…”“Happy,” I said, “you look excited and

nervous and happy.” She did. I could see it.

And with that, Mary Ellen burst into a lovely story about doing what you really want to do in life and not letting fear govern decisions and why now and the early deaths of two of her beloved siblings and a supportive family and job and friends. Then she shared her travel aspirations – extensive, I promise you, from Indonesia to India to Africa to Portugal and everywhere in between – and about realizing her dreams of moving to California and learning to fly kites.

And of traveling around the world.She talked of coming home, too, and

of potentially being back on the float for the Fiesta parade. She spoke of missing her friends and her family and Santa Barbara in general.

She was an inspiration, truly, and I wish there were others around to experience her whole scene, right then, right there, in that moment. She was radiant, defiant and yet a bit morose too. It was actually pretty powerful.

She finished her hot water with lemon, stood up, gave a hug and a kiss, and walked out quickly, back to worrying about all of the loose ends still dangling around her just hours before a six month sabbatical.

And as she walked back out the front door, she turned and waved goodbye.

I smiled. I waved. And that was the end of Mary Ellen Tiffany.

For a few months, anyway.(Good luck and Godspeed, Mary

Ellen, travel safely. You’re missed by your friends and your family and your community already, and Wendi and I can’t wait to have you for dinner and go through your pictures when you get home. Be well.)

Stuff I LikeMary Ellen reminded me that I like

peace and I like love, plain and simple, baby. It shouldn’t be a surprise, then, that I also like Tibetan Buddhism. His Eminence Garchen Rinpoche – a much loved and widely celebrated teacher in the Drikung Kagyu tradition of Tibetan Buddhism – is coming to the University Club next Thursday, March 7, 2013, from 7 – 9pm. This is a big deal, folks, and should be a really transformational evening. I will be there. Why? Because “the only cause of happiness is love.” And “the only cause of suffering is self-grasping.” Pour yourself a glass of wine and chew on that one for awhile. And check out www.garchen.net for more information.

Continuing the vibe, I like yoga and Pilates and wellness. And so I’m really excited for The Loft, Emilee Garfield’s Yoga and Pilates Studio at The Training Room. Emilee is a friend, and she has been doing fantastic injury prevention and therapeutic work – as well as just plain getting people into great shape – around these parts for years now. She has teamed up with Dr. Mark Brisby at The Training Room, a celebrated elite training and rehabilitation program in its own right, in a new facility at 1 North Calle Cesar Chavez, and the place looks fantastic. (Congratulations, guys.) They are having a Grand Opening celebration on Friday, March 1, 2013, from 5 – 7pm, and I hear that there may be snacks and, perhaps, beverages. I’m going, and anticipate leaving far more flexible and long and powerful. Not because of the beverages… but because Emilee is just that good.

Ah hell, I might as well finish the category. I like Berkeley, man, People’s Park, activism. And all that is fine and good. But you know what I really like about Berkeley? Alice Waters. I like her a lot. I went to Cal and know her Chez Panisse well. (In fact, I read Alice Waters and Chez Panisse last year in a few days.) I dig her thinking, I dig her grub, I dig her style of food-related activism. Alice is coming to SB, thanks to UCSB Arts & Lectures and the UCSB Alumni Association. (Go Old Gauchos!) An Evening with Alice Waters will go down on Saturday, April 27, 2013, at 8pm, at Campbell Hall. Better get tickets now or they will be gone. www.ArtsAndLectures.UCSB.edu or 805.893.3535.

Peace. And oooohhhhhhmmmmm.

...continued from p.5


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I f you were to call the 40-plus year cult career of one man band-engineer-label-distributor R.

Stevie Moore “misguided,” you would be altogether incorrect: it’s not been guided at all.

Only a music industry professional fresh off the time machine from the ante-information age would use a word like that to describe the legend of underground pop, and besides, no one asked (and there’s no such thing as a time machine, just ask a music industry professional). Since first teaching himself how to record songs at home as a teenager in the late 1960s, Moore has followed only his own interests and managed to work outside of the industrial music biz complex – to the detriment of his name recognition and bank account, perhaps, but to the benefit of the many admirers who are drawn to his prescient ingenuity and preternatural prolificacy of rewarding material.

In an era when bands hand off their hype-cycle narratives to journalists and bloggers before even the release of their first MP3 (a semi-recent favorite example being Christopher Owens of the already broken-up Girls sticking to his claim that he was raised by a religious cult before escaping to California to make music), it makes sense that Moore, in his 60s with a story long in the making, has today’s hip elite looking toward him as a sort of father figure of the DIY ethos. When we fear that all the pieces we read and posts we write and conversations we have and songs we stream might be all for naught, Moore brings a sense of security: we may not remember the name of our favorite band from last month, but there’s Stevie, still there, as he apparently always has been. Moore’s existence in the world assures us that the rock ‘n’ roll dream doesn’t have to die after an overly engineered second or third album. As bands cling to ever-diminishing groups of fans that were caught up in an initial nonrecurrent buzz, Moore welcomes newcomers continuously, and keeps them around with a back catalog of over 300 albums (or 400, depending on who you ask).

And then there seems to be a fortuitous convergence of Moore’s and the young culture consumer’s sensibilities. Moore has held steady through every musical micro-trend to come and to pass since he started, but for the past few years, “the kids,” or at least the ones attune to this sort of thing, are hanging out in a post chill-wave landscape and listening

to what one journalist complimentarily dubbed “hypnogogic pop” – hypnogogia signifying the state between waking and sleeping (which sounds to me like a polite way of evoking the usually pejorative descriptor “soporific”). Either way, this movement that writers try to wrestle onto the page is roughly akin to what Moore has been spending so much time doing in his home studio. Take that timeliness and add a raised awareness through championing from the scene’s current hero, Ariel Pink, who wouldn’t have a template without Moore, or at least not much of a precedent, and you have a generation of bedroom musicians that have found a credibility-lending star they can look up to and identify with.

These millennial types love the physical articles of the esoteric (and for them Moore provides vinyl and cassettes galore, handmade packaging and all), but they also, as we constantly hear about, live out their lives online. The typical baby boomer might express a sense of discomfort with the reduced privacy of a life on display, lacking their sons’ and daughters’ urge toward self-documentation; Moore does not. As he has with other new and more efficient modes of promotion and distribution – moving from LP to cassette and then to CDR as his medium of choice – Moore takes to the Internet with great enthusiasm: see his bandcamp.com page where you can download only about 200 of his releases, or his website, an experience to navigate in its own right and a dump of web 1.0 detritus, that contains video footage, flyers, hand-written notes, and hundreds of photos

Dust&CoverA Southerner until relocating to Santa Barbara

last year, Jeremy used to play in bands and work in a record store; he thinks this qualifies him to write about music. He had to work the night his fiancée walked out the door alone into a sultry Georgia night to see an R. Stevie Moore show a couple years ago, but won’t miss the opportunity this time. Send him records for review, local music news, congratulatory notes, praise, and thank yous, by emailing [email protected].

by Jeremy Harbin

Who is R. Stevie Moore?

R. Stevie Moore in a refrigerator, from the cover of his 1987 album (1952-19??).

A photo shoot of a photo shoot, for the cover of Moore’s Advanced.

Where It’s At

Where: Biko House, 6612 Sueno Road, Isla Vista

When: Feb. 28; 7:30pmCost: $5 donation

spanning the musician’s entire life. One blog post about Moore’s upcoming West Coast tour from an Olympia, Washington site has a single comment, and it’s from Moore himself. He uses the world wide web as an extension of what he has always been building, a body of work that spins off into several directions at once.

Don’t Stay HomeWhen R. Stevie Moore comes through

Santa Barbara, he’ll be playing the Biko House in Isla Vista, not the Lobero Theatre like the similarly revered Jeff Mangum. It’s curious, but what that difference indicates might just be a defining quality of R. Stevie Moore: his unrecognized genius, of which he freely and only somewhat tongue-in-cheekily likes to remind writers and interviewers. He has become a martyr for rock ‘n’ roll, dedicating his life to the humble business of being a master of pop craft. Had Moore ever risen to anything resembling fame in the independent music world, he might not have been able to sustain such a diverse, interesting, and fruitful career; without a swooping bell curve of success as measured by album sales and tickets sold, he has maintained a constant and steady trajectory with no peaks to fall from.

But I would hate to take the fun out of it with all this speculation. R. Stevie Moore has been backed by a loud and lively rock band on recent tours; his stop at the Biko House will likely find him in a similar mode. I’ve thus far been successful in abiding by my rule to avoid Isla Vista after sunset (the dark cloud hanging over it in broad daylight is unnerving enough for me), but I plan to break it to see the man himself on February 28. Moore hasn’t historically toured with the frequency he records, and according to the list of past live shows on his website, this will be his first time in Santa Barbara. It could very well be his last, seeing as how our little town, unique in its beauty and wonder though it is, is not a hub of touring outre-pop artists. San Diego’s Plateaus and K Records band Lake provide support.


SAVE THE DATE! SEPTEMBER 28, 2013

HEAL THE OCEAN IS HAVING A RIP-ROARING MUSICAL DINNER SHOW

AT THE NEW EL ENCANTO RESORT

ON THE FABULOUS SANTA BARBARA RIVIERA!

No Auction, No Raffle, No Kidding!Just Fabulous Dinner and Entertainment!

Invitations go out early August 2013

Heal the Ocean is realigning itself. Instead of suing city and county (or State) agencies, we are focusing on facilitating the process by which millions of dollars can be had for these agencies through the State grant process.

We are focused on upgrading wastewater infrastructure, and we are helping local water and wastewater districts find funds for the things we, ourselves, want to upgrade and change, to help the ocean.

And, we’d like you to be part of it. Join us on September 28 and get to know the rest of us at

Heal The Ocean!

Heal the Ocean, 1836 State Street, Santa Barbara, CA 93101; (805) 965-7570 www.healtheocean.org


A longtime writer, editor and film critic, Jim has worked nationwide for several websites and publications – including the Dayton Daily News,

Key West Citizen, Topeka Capital-Journal, Las Cruces Sun-News and Santa Ynez Valley Journal. California is his seventh state. When he isn’t watching movies or sports around the Central Coast and Los Angeles, you can find Jim writing and reading while he enjoys coffee and bacon, or Coke and pizza.

by Jim Luksic

Oscar Baloney and Other Fine Cuts

ARLINGTON

1317 State Street - 963-4408

PLAZA DE ORO371 Hitchcock Way - S.B.

PASEO NUEVO8 W. De La Guerra Pl. - S.B.

RIVIERA2044 Alameda Padre Serra - S.B.

Information Listed for Friday thru Thursday - February 22 - 28

FIESTA 5Features Stadium Seating

916 State Street - S.B.

CAMINO REALFeatures Stadium SeatingCAMINO REAL MARKETPLACE

Hollister & Storke - GOLETA

METRO 4Features Stadium Seating

618 State Street - S.B.

FAIRVIEWFeatures Stadium Seating

225 N. Fairview - Goleta8 Academy Award Nominations

including Best Pictureand Best Actress -Jennifer Lawarence

SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK1:30 4:15 7:00 (R)

BEAUTIFUL CREATURES1:45 4:30 7:30 (PG-13)

ESCAPE FROMPLANET EARTH (PG) in 2D: 2:00 4:45 7:15

5 Academy Award Nominationsincluding Best Picture andBest Foreign Language Film

AMOUR (PG-13)Fri & Mon-Thu - 4:45 7:45Sat/Sun - 1:45 4:45 7:45

Kerri Russell DARK SKIES (PG-13)

Fri-Sun - 1:45 4:20 7:00 9:40Mon-Thu - 2:45 5:30 8:00

BLESS ME, ULTIMA (PG-13) Fri-Sun - 1:10 3:40 6:30 9:10Mon-Thu - 2:20 4:50 7:25

ESCAPE FROMPLANET EARTH (PG)

in 3D: Daily - 7:35in 2D: Fri-Sun - 12:45 3:00

5:20 9:45Mon-Thu - 3:00 5:20

Jeremy Irons (PG-13)BEAUTIFUL CREATURES

Fri-Sun - 1:00 3:50 6:40 9:30Mon-Thu - 2:10 5:00 7:55

John MalkovichWARM BODIES (PG-13)

Fri-Sun - 1:30 4:10 6:50 9:20Mon-Thu - 2:30 5:10 7:45

Dwayne Johnson SNITCH (PG-13)

1:30 4:10 6:50 9:30

A GOOD DAY TODIE HARD (R)

1:50 3:10 4:30 5:457:10 8:15 9:40

Playing on 2 Screens

IDENTITY THIEF (R)1:20 4:00 6:40 9:20

SAFE HAVEN (PG-13)2:30 5:15 8:00

THE IMPOSSIBLE (PG-13)1:10 6:30

SIDE EFFECTS (R)Fri-Wed - 3:50 9:10Thu 2/28 - 3:50

Thursday 2/28 - 10:00 pm JACK (2D or 3D) (PG-13)

THE GIANT SLAYER

The Man! The Mayor!The Movie!

KOCH (Not Rated)Fri & Mon-Thu - 5:15 7:45Sat/Sun - 2:15 5:15 7:45

11 Academy Award Nominationsincluding Best Picture and

Best Director - Ang LeeLIFE OF PI (PG) in 2DFri & Mon-Thu - 5:00Sat/Sun - 2:00 5:00

5 Academy Award Nominationsincluding Best Picture!

DJANGO UNCHAINED (R)7:30

A GOOD DAY TODIE HARD (R)

Fri-Tue -2:45 5:15 7:45

Wed/Thu - 2:45

8 Academy Award Nominationsincluding Best Picture

and Best Director!SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK (R)1:40 4:30 7:30

Maggie Smithin A Dustin Hoffman Film

QUARTET (PG-13)2:00 4:40 7:15

Rooney Mara......Jude LawCatherine Zeta-JonesSIDE EFFECTS (R)

2:15 5:10 7:45

12 Academy Award Nominationsincluding Best Picture and

Best Actor - Daniel Day-LewisLINCOLN (PG-13) 4:50

5 Academy Award Nominationsincluding Best Picture

ZERO DARK THIRTY (R)1:30 8:00

Dwayne Johnson SNITCH (PG-13)

Fri-Sun -2:00 4:40 7:20 10:00

Mon-Thu - 2:40 5:20 8:00

Bruce Willis (R)A GOOD DAY TO DIE HARDFri-Sun - 1:20 4:00 6:40 9:15Mon-Thu - 3:20 5:45 8:15

Josh DuhamelJulianne HoughSAFE HAVEN (PG-13)

Fri-Sun - 1:30 4:10 6:50 9:30Mon-Thu - 2:10 4:50 7:30

Jason BatemanMelissa McCarthyIDENTITY THIEF (R)

Fri-Sun - 1:40 4:30 7:10 9:50Mon-Thu - 2:25 5:10 7:45

Courtyard Bar OpenFri & Sat - 4:00 - 8:00

Denotes ‘SPECIAL ENGAGEMENT’ Restrictions

Thursday - March 28 - 7:30 pm

A DEEPER SHADE OF BLUE

ARLINGTON THEATRE

877-789-MOVIE www.metrotheatres.com

THE MET Opera 2013

Saturday, March 2 - 9:00 amWagner’s PARSIFAL

Arlington Theatre

•MOVIE gUIDE•

Let’s get the simple part of Sunday night’s Academy Awards gala over with: My crystal ball says those

striking gold will include Argo, Steven Spielberg, Daniel Day-Lewis, Jennifer Lawrence, Robert De Niro and Anne Hathaway. If accurate, I take no pride; if off base, I make no apologies.

Now the tougher task: Trying to figure out why good films get overhyped while superior ones are inexplicably ignored. I’m still scratching my head about Silver Linings Playbook being bestowed with eight Oscar nods and – even more disturbing – the fact that Life of Pi somehow accrued 11. (Had I seen a different movie titled Life of Pi?)

I suppose the latter’s embarrassment of riches is acknowledgement of director Ang Lee’s overall body of work, not only for his slice of Pi, which is hard to digest despite its visual marvels. And though David O. Russell provided splinters of raw emotion for his Playbook team, I never envisioned such a human wave of support.

But then, it can be a chore to take the Oscars seriously when there are nine Best Picture hopefuls and Skyfall isn’t among them, ostensibly just because James Bond is a name brand and part of an ongoing series. And I shall keep beating a drum, even if nobody marches to it, about the snubbing of Moonrise Kingdom, Lawless and The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, whose ensemble casts were unrivaled in 2012.

Currently showing, mercifully under the Academy’s radar:

A Good Day to Die Hard achieves what must be a modern record for vehicles damaged and bullets spent, along with the most hackneyed Russian dialogue ever captured on film. Bruce Willis reprises his role as John McClane, one of NYPD’s finest (and oldest): He goes to Russia – under the pretense of “vacation” – and ruins his son’s plan involving oligarchs, one of whom apparently thinks he looks more evil by eating a carrot when making threats. The climactic trip to a notorious nuclear site wouldn’t seem quite so dated if Chernobyl Diaries hadn’t visited there a year ago. While trying to stop Die Hard’s opening car chase, one participant scoffs, “I’ve had enough of this (bleep)!” That makes two of us.

For filmgoers, Safe Haven is anything but. Unless you’re a slave to author

Nicholas Sparks’ sweet-tooth romances, this shameless exercise will strip you of your wits. It could be argued that I run in crabby circles and have high expectations – but it’s more accurate to say Julianne Hough’s ice queen takes an hour to defrost, despite roaming a sun-kissed coast while gazing at birds in flight (symbolizing her “freedom”). Swedish icon Lasse Hallstrom – who directed What’s Eating Gilbert Grape, Chocolat and The Cider House Rules to build his reputation – now seems hell-bent on destroying it.


Peters’ PickIt’s the comics in the back. The box is haphazardly thrown into the isle, in between

old frames and kitchen knobs, full of amazing adventures with Spiderman, the Hulk or any other superhero you can image. The kids sift through the box like they have struck gold. The shop is always full of marvels like carved African masks or large stone Buddhas. They hunt through it all before heading to the box. But, at the end of the day, it’s all about the comics. They dig out their money and for $1.00 they walk away with another great adventure. Random, 1207 State St, Santa Barbara.

Former editor for the fashion/lifestyle section of the New York Post, Mara moved to London and worked as a contributing editor for the Daily Mail’s You Magazine, freelancing for Look Magazine, NY Post and the Style Magazine for The Sunday Times. To remain sane during diaper years she writes a mommy blog, You Have Your Hands Full – www.handsfullsb.com.

by Mara Peters

You Have Your Hands Full

“Never, ever negotiate with a terrorist.”

That’s what I was telling my oldest, Jackson, as I was handling my red-faced, crying youngest, Charlie, who was desperately doing anything possible to avoid what was already effectively a sealed fate.

“You are going to ski school – ”“NOOOOO,” Charlie screamed.“ – and you are going to swim class –”

my voice was rising to ensure auditory reception over his wailing.

Jackson was growing concerned. “Not now, Charlie, Mom means later,” he said, trying to appease his young brother.

“NOOOO!!!” Charlie cried harder.Jackson saw the future and begged me

to stop. “Mom, really, give it up. I can’t stand this.”

I brushed off his sympathetic overtures and heightened the rhetoric. “ – AND you are going to listen when I tell you ‘No’ because No means ‘NO!’” I finished in full command volume.

The room went deadly silent. I turned back to Jackson and finished

my thought, calmly explaining Israel’s approach to dealing with terrorists. “You see Jackson, to deter terrorists from kidnappings or hijackings, they refuse to even negotiate. So terrorists never, ever get what they want. And, as a result, there hasn’t been a plane hijacking in Israel in over forty years.”

It’s an effective strategy, really. The

problem in our house, though, is that I had been engaging our three-year-old terrorist, Osama bin Charlie, for too long.

Jihad at Mammoth MountainRecently OBC managed to terrorize all

of Mammoth ski school each morning at drop off. After the first day, I refused to take him, thereby forcing Alpha to jump on the grenade. Charlie would start out the morning pretending to be cheery, even excited for the day ahead.

Charlie accepts defeat and endures ski school.

On Toddlers, Terrorism and Taylor Swift

He’d chat happily on the drive over to the mountain. But at the first step through ski school doors, he’d launch his sneak attack: Screaming bloody murder, encouraging other little tykes to join his jihad. And at the first opportunity, Alpha would tumble through the emergency escape, deeply wounded, emotionally scarred.

Let’s be honest. Charlie is a charming, cute terrorist and when it was all over, he managed to make us laugh about it. A week after the ski vacation, we were on our way home from pre-school and there he was, be-bopping in the back seat to Taylor Swift.

“I am never, ever, EVER going to ski school again,” he sang along with her, laughing at his own version. “Like NEVER.”

I told the whole family at dinner and we all thought it was the funniest thing we ever, like ever, heard. Charlie beamed with pride that he got us laughing so hard. He launched in to his now trademark version repeating Taylor Swift, with his twist a few more times for effect.

“Okay, Charlie P, no more ski school for you,” I relented.

“Never, ever?” he’d asked with a smile. “Never, ever.”And that was it. I should have been

ashamed of myself. Right then and there marked the moment the seeds were sown, the revolt energized, the insurgency orchestrated.

A Carefully Calculated Counterattack

Playing in the pool a few days later, I told Osama bin Charlie – the cute, playful version – that he was going to have to learn how to swim and that I was going to set up some classes. He stopped splashing on the steps and looked at me quizzically, his bottom lip quivering.

“Why?” he asked, with that angelic face of his starting to turn shades of purple.

“Because it’s unsafe to have a pool with a non-swimmer in the house. You gotta learn how to swim buddy,” I explained.

“AND GO UNDERWATER?!” voice raised, he was in full panic-mode now. Half scream, half sing-song, he continued, “I am never, EVER going to swim school mom, like never.”

Funny, it wasn’t so cute anymore. And it continued, for two painful days. “Mom, did you hear me, I am never going to

swim class? Do you hear me Mom? Like never,” he would say while I was cooking dinner, or giving him goodnight kisses, or over morning pancakes, or in the car on the way to pre-school. The assault was relentless and my forces were breaking down. The more he charged, the further I retreated. He had tasted victory before and he was not going to stop until the battle was won.

My back was against a wall.

Mara NetanyahuThat is when I went into hardcore

Israeli-mode. I took everything away from him. The bargaining was at an end. The negotiations over. Ski school was back on, swimming was going to happen and I was finally back in charge. The assault must – and will – end.

And to the wonderment of my oldest (and to me as well, to be honest) we watched Osama bin Charlie accept defeat, right there in his toddler bed. He grabbed his favorite blanket and smiled a little. “I love you Mommy,” he said.

“I love you too little man,” I warmed, going in for the hug.

After a long, nice pause, he asked innocently, while patting my back, “When I go to ski school, I want a boy instructor, okay?”

I was hugging him and almost immediately said “of course” when I stopped and looked over at Jackson. He raised his eyebrows. “Remember the Israelis,” he mouthed to me.

“You get whoever you get, Charlie, I am not going to talk about this.” I was not going to negotiate with a terrorist.

“Okay, Mommy” he relented, falling back into his pillow with a sigh.

That’s my boy.“Goodnight, Charlie,” I looked down

at him warmly.“Goodnight, Mommy,” he replied,

looking up into my eyes, angelic face almost glowing in the light from the hallway.

But deswpite the sweet sing-song tone in his tiny voice, I swear I heard something different. I heard strength and resolve. I heard the confidence that comes only from a successfully implemented strategic decision. And I saw tenacity in my little Charlie’s eyes.

He may have lost this battle, but the war rages on.

And Charlie lived to fight another day.

BRING IN COUPON TO RECEIVE A COMPLIMENTARY DRINK

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PETROS in Santa BarbaraANNOUNCING two new weekly specials

beginning Thursday, February 21st:ThURSDAY- Live World Music & All You Can Eat Buffet

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Located in the historic La Arcada Plaza1114 State Street, Suite 18 | 805.965.1730 | www.stateandfig.com

A Public Service Announcement from the “StAte”

NOW SERVING DINNER TOO! Wed - Sun starting at 5pm.

• LOVE IS FREE

What: 85th Annual Academy Awards (aka The Oscars)

Where: Live on ABCWhen: Sunday, February 24, at 4pmWhy: Catch a golden glimpse of the latest red

carpet fashion trends... and, of course, the best in cinematic achievement.

How: Grab your friends, crack a bottle of bubbly, print nominee ballots from oscar.go.com and have fun making predictions on who the winners will be.

What’ll It Cost Me: Oscar Sunday is free… except for that bottle of Veuve.

• LOOSE CHANGE

What: Children’s Birdhouse WorkshopWhere: Santa Barbara Botanic Gardens,

1212 Mission Canyon RoadWhen: Saturday, February 23, 10am – 12pmWhy: This makes our wings flutter! Children ages

5 – 12 can create and decorate their own bird house and feeders for their favorite feathery friends.

How: Gather your chickadees and flock to the Botanic Gardens.

What’ll It Cost Me: $5 member child, $10 member adult/ $5 non-member child, $15 non-member adult.

• HEY BIG SPENDER

What: Cold War KidsWhere: SOhO, 1221 State StreetWhen: Saturday, February 23

(Doors at 7pm; Show at 9pm)Why: The SoCal indie rock band will

leave you “Flying Upside Down”. If you’re lucky, they may even preview a few songs from their new album Dear Miss Lonelyhearts, debuting this April.

How: Be “Fashionable” and “Behave Yourself.”

What’ll It Cost Me: $22.50 per person

WEEkENd GuIdE by

Happy Trails

.com

by Sarah Dodge

BE ACTIV

EThis Spring, break out your

best star performance and join trailblazers Zack Bertges and Nancy Kaplan at Elings Park. Every Wednesday night from March 13 through April 24, you can be a part of Santa Barbara’s first ever 5K nighttime trail running event, Stellar Nites. Perfect for first time trail seekers and mountain warriors alike, this premier trail running series is guaranteed to be unlike anything you’ve ever set foot on before. Complete with sunset, a few brews, a few views and a whole lot of fun, this is one weekly workout we can get happy about.

Maybe Roy Rogers said it best: “Some trails are happy ones, others are blue. It’s the way you ride the trail that counts, here’s a happy one for you.” So get out there and ride the trails at Elings Park this Spring. Check out www.sbrunningco.com/calendar (go to March 13 entry) for more details.

STYLE FILESmooth Talkby Briana Westmacott

A lavender-infused salt bath and sugar body scrub

helped slip us into a deep relaxation. Then we followed it up with a buttery smooth Shea Butter treatment and we were soft and glowing. Were we at the latest day spa du jour? Nope. We were nestled right in the comfort of our own home.

And our mini home spa had our wintry dry dermis delighting.

We needed this self-pampering and guess you could use it too. The best part is that all you have to do is acquire some of Natura Culina’s organic skin care products and lock your bathroom door.

Natura Culina is inspired by Old World European spa traditions, and their Summerland-made products are created from organic ingredients meant to nourish and feed your skin. Founder Lenka Tinka started her company based on her passion for health and vitality. She is originally from outside of Carlsbad in the Czech Republic, an area famous for its spa cities and the use of nature to heal people and their skin, and wanted to bring some of the beauty treatments from her homeland to those around her. Lucky for us, Lenka just so happened to bring her knowledge right here to Santa Barbara.

So set your spa date, select your Natura Culina products and dedicate an hour (or more) to give your skin the pleasure it deserves. You’ll be smiling (and smooth) for days. We were.

You can find Natura Culina at a handful of local businesses. Check www.naturaculina.com for retail locations or order directly from their site. Happy spa day!

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REAL ESTATEMichael has consistently been ranked in the

top 1% of Sotheby’s agents worldwide. Shortly after joining Sotheby’s, he partnered with Nancy Hamilton to form one of the most successful real estate teams in Santa Barbara. Michael can be reached at [email protected]

by Michael Calcagno

4135 Lago Drive

4061 Ramitas Road

4620 Via Vistosa

Purchase price: $1,860,000Down payment (20%): $372,000Loan amount: $1,488,000Loan payment: $6,723(30-yr fixed at 3.5% (3.54% APR))Property taxes estimate: $1,705Home insurance estimate: $120

Total Monthly Payment:$8,548





Mortgage statistics provided by Justin M. Kellenberger, Senior Loan Officer at SG Premier Lending Group, Inc. Justin can always be reached at [email protected].

Note: The foregoing economic breakdowns do not include potential tax benefit analyses since that will ultimately depend upon a number of additional factors. But home ownership can indeed have tremendous tax-savings potential and should be considered with your realtor and/or tax accountant as part of the ownership decision.

Hope Ranch (Not Bad, Not Bad At All)

Hope Ranch is located in the southeastern region of Santa Barbara and is bordered by Highway 101, the Pacific Ocean, Arroyo Burro Beach and More Mesa. It consists of an expansive flat mesa and low rolling hills broken by a beautiful valley

and covered with impressive live oaks. Well known for some of Santa Barbara’s most impressive estates, the area also has a very notable history.

The first written reference of Hope Ranch dates back to 1769 by Captain Gaspar de Portola who was greeted by friendly Indians from the Cieneguitas tribe. (In fact, there is evidence of Indian life in Hope Ranch that dates back six to ten thousand years.) The first private owner of Hope Ranch was Lt. Narcisco Fabregat of the Santa Barbara Presidio. He received the land in a grant from Governor Manuel Micheltorena on May 16, 1843.

Soon after, Thomas Hope, for whom the land was ultimately named, purchased the Ranch in 1861 to raise his flock of 5,000 sheep to meet the increased demand for wool production necessary for military uniforms stemming from the Civil War. Then in 1876, the Southern Pacific Railroad purchased the land from Hope. Originally, they’d thought of building a large tourist hotel comparable to the Hotel de Coronado del Monte.

Execution of this plan never occurred, though, and it wasn’t until Harold Chase bought the Ranch in 1923 that any substantial development actually took place. Chase progressed with the installation of roads, utilities and bridle trails and laid the groundwork for the design of a residential community. He then began the course of selling lots in the Ranch to people who wished to make it their home.

Hope Ranch is now a community of 773 lots embodying 1,863 acres. In 2012, there were a total of 33 properties that sold in the area, with a low of $980,000 and a high of $18,101,063. There are currently 27 properties actively for sale in the Ranch, 5 of which have recently gone pending. Here are three of those; they are all good deals by Hope Ranch standards.


OPEN HOUSE gUIDESUNDAY, FEBRUARY 24Downtown 18 West Victoria Street #308 12-5pm $2,600,000 2bd/3ba Alma Del Pueblo Sales Team 845-4393 Village Properties 18 West Victoria Street #212 12-5pm $2,500,000 2bd/3ba Alma Del Pueblo Sales Team 845-4393 Village Properties 2224 De La Vina 1-4pm $1,650,000 3bd/3.5ba Vivien Alexander 689-6683 Village Properties 18 West Victoria Street #307 12-5pm $1,250,000 1bd/2ba Alma Del Pueblo Sales Team 845-4393 Village Properties 18 West Victoria Street #108 12-5pm $1,100,000 1bd/2ba Alma Del Pueblo Sales Team 845-4393 Village Properties 121 West De La Guerra Street #5 2-4pm $1,059,000 1bd/1.5ba Joy Bean 895-1422 Sotheby’s International Realty 18 West Victoria Street #111 12-5pm $875,000 1bd/1ba Alma Del Pueblo Sales Team 845-4393 Village Properties 18 West Victoria Street #109 12-5pm $855,000 0bd/1ba Alma Del Pueblo Sales Team 845-4393 Village Properties

Las Positas 1212 Bel Air Drive 1-4pm $1,795,000 5bd/4ba John Bahura 680-5175 Village Properties

La Cumbre Area 4086 Cuervo Avenue 12-2pm $3,750,000 4bd/3.5ba Adrienne Schuele 452-3960 Village Properties 4163 Marina Drive 3-5pm $3,500,000 4bd/3.5ba Adrienne Schuele 452-3960 Village Properties

Mission Canyon 1417 Mission Canyon Road 1-3pm $2,200,000 4bd/4.5ba Daniela Johnson 453-4555 Sotheby’s International Realty 729 Mission Canyon Road 2-4pm $1,995,000 3bd/3ba John Luca 680-5572 Sotheby’s International Realty 2875 Kenmore Place 2-4pm $995,000 4bd/2.5ba Angela Moloney Braverman 451-1553 Prudential California Realty

Riviera 1042 Arbolado Road 1-4pm $2,150,000 3bd/2.5ba Brian King 452-0471 Village Properties 1300 Las Alturas Road 1-3pm $2,000,000 3bd/2.5ba Pascale Bassan 689-5528 Prudential California Realty 237 Las Alturas Road 2-4pm $1,595,000 3bd/2ba Teresa Salvione 570-7812 Prudential California Realty 638 Colina Lane By Appt. $1,095,000 4bd/4ba Jeanne & Michael Palumbo 689-1968 Sotheby’s International Realty

San Roque 3656 Eileen Way 1-4pm $1,229,000 5bd/3ba The Easter Team Realtors 570-0403 Prudential California Realty 3920 Calle Cita 1-3pm $699,000 2bd/1ba Madhu Khemani 252-0625 Prudential California Realty

Eastside 333 Junipero Plaza 2-4pm $5,750,000 4bd/4.5ba Paul Hurst 680-8216 Prudential California Realty 1131 East Haley Street 12-3pm $579,000 2bd/2ba Ricardo Munoz 895-8725 Prudential California Realty

Goleta 903 N. Kellogg Avenue 12:30-3pm $975,000 4bd/2.5ba Philip Ranger 797-6308 Sotheby’s International Realty 7769 Bradford Drive 2-4pm $775,000 4bd/2ba Justin Corrado 451-9969 Sotheby’s International Realty 654 Rossmore Road 2-4pm $599,000 3bd/2ba Nicole Dinkelacker 570-8444 Village Properties 5788 Encina Road #2 By Appt. $405,000 2bd/1.5ba Gail Pearl 637-9595 Sotheby’s International Realty 313 Moreton Bay Lane #5 By Appt. $264,000 1bd/1ba Michael Pearl 637-6888 Sotheby’s International Realty 333 Old Mill Road #312 12-3pm $189,000 2bd/2ba Jeff Oien 681-8122 Village Properties

AdVERTISE 805.845.1673SANTA BARBARA

Operated by Sotheby’s International Realty, Inc.

Santa baRbaRa aRea bROkeRageS | sothebyshomes.commOntecItO cOaSt vIllage ROad bROkeRage | mOntecItO uppeR vIllage bROkeRage

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Our agents are skilled professionals with local knowledge and a dedication to high-quality service for every client. they take great pleasure in discovering the aspects that make each home unique.

lOcal eXpeRtISe. eXtRaORdInaRy ReSultS.

One Of a kInd | Web: 0113622 | $15,500,000 Suzanne Perkins 805.895.2138

feRnald pOInt | Web: 0113609 | $28,000,000 Maureen McDermut 805.570.5545, Bob Lamborn 805.689.6800

ROmantIc SpanISh-Style hacIenda | Web: 0632011 | $5,950,000 Cristal Clarke 805.886.9378

fabulOuS vIeWS | Web: 0631883 | $3,995,000 Robert Hanrahan 805.698.2826

SpanISh cOlOnIal-Style | Web: 0113657 | $4,850,000 Maureen McDermut 805.570.5545

StylISh cRaftSman | Web: 0113660 | $3,595,000 Lisa Loiacono 805.452.2799

ultRa-chIc In mOntecItO | Web: 0632050 | $2,495,000 Cristal Clarke 805.886.9378

bIg Ocean & mOuntaIn vIeWS | Web: 0113601 | $2,995,000 Tim Cardy 805.637.0878

cape cOd Style faRmhOuSe | Web: 0621537 | $2,320,000 Mary Ann Foss 805.455.1476

cRaftSman W/ panORamIc vIeWS | Web: 0621543 | $1,395,000 Patty Murphy 805.680.8571

elegant uppeR eaSt | Web: 0592485 | $1,445,000 Michael Calcagno 805.896.0876, Nancy Hamilton 805.451.4442

2 hOuSeS On appROX. 5 acReS | Web: 0621522 | $1,099,000 Patty Murphy 805.680.8571

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