Getting To Yes - Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In

Getting to Yes:Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In

Harvard Negotiation Project

Began in 1983

In conjunction with MIT and Tufts

Negotiation art and a science

Getting to Yes Authors

Roger Fisher

Bruce Patton William Ury

Dilemma: people see two ways to negotiate1. Soft 2. Hard

Soft: avoid conflict, make concessions Often end up exploited and feeling bitter

Hard: sees any situation as a contest of wills Exhausts people and resources and harms

relationships

Getting to Yes

Being nice is no answer

In soft negotiations: yield as necessary to avoid conflict

(e.g. WWII)

B/t friends and family, it tends to be efficient as it produces results quickly

But it does not ensure a wise agreement

Getting to Yes

Third way to negotiate: both hard and soft Principled Negotiation: decides issues on their

Merits

Look for mutual gains wherever possible.

Where interests conflict, insist that results be based on some fair and independent standards.

Getting to Yes

Arguing over positions produces unwise agreements

Negotiators lock themselves into positions which they must defend

The more you defend, the harder it is to change a position

Position now involves ego and saving face

Getting to Yes

Arguing over positions endangers an ongoing relationship

Strains and sometimes shatters relationships

One ego always ends up bruised

Getting to Yes

4 Basic Points:

People: separate the people from the problem

Interests: focus on interests, not positions

Options: generate a variety of possibilities before deciding what to do

Criteria: insists that the results be based on some objective standard

Principled Negotiation

People: separate the people from the problem

Emotions cloud objective merits

Egos become identified with positions

Create Cognitive Dissonance

Principled Negotiation

Interests Focus on interests, not positions A position may obscure what you really

want Ask Why? Ask Why not? Ex: talks on nuclear testing breakdown

over number of inspections

Principled Negotiation

Miscommunication

Lessee: “I always pay the rent whenever she asks for it.”

Lessor: “He never pays the rent until I ask for it.”

Fear of Uncertainty

People fear what the other side intends to do!

"They met in a bar, where he offered her a ride home. He took her down unfamiliar streets. He said it was a shortcut……

Try To Understand

You might say, "You have a strong case. Let me see if I can explain it. Here's the way it strikes me...."

Understanding is not agreeing!

Problem before Answer

Money Phrases

"Please correct me if I'm wrong…"

"Could I ask you a few questions to see whether my facts are right?“

"What's the principle behind your action?"

Options: generate a variety of possibilities before deciding what to do

Searching for the one right solution inhibits creativity

example: argument over an orange

Principled Negotiation

Criteria: insists that the results be based on some objective standard

Ex: market value, expert opinion, custom, precedence or law

both parties can defer to a fair solution without giving in to each other

Principled Negotiation

Best Alternative To Negotiated Agreement

Always keep in mind

Be careful about disclosing!

BATNA

A mediator asks about interests instead of positions. Asks “why?”

First, she tries to learn all she can about the needs and interests.

Explores the possibility of a recommendation

Involves preparing drafts and asking for criticisms.

The one-text procedure

Dubious Intentions Incorporate compliance feature

Manipulate Physical Environment Small Chair, Hot, Sun

Personal Attack No eye contact, disguised insult

Common Tricks

Tom Insurance Agent

You knew all of this already!

Only Learn by Practice

Forget “Winning”

Conclusion

Make the most of your potential power.

Getting to Yes

Let us never negotiate out of fear.But let us never fear to negotiate.

-John F. Kennedy