Actual160 09 Nov12

Part 1:How to Nail Your Essay

November 12, 2009

Today

1. Essay Workshop: Part 12. Jeopardy Quotation Selection

1: Read Comments from Earlier

1: Read Comments from Earlier

FormatStructureContentSentence-levelDocumentation

2. Talk to Your Instructor

3. Start Early

Topic Brainstorming Thesis Outline Research Draft Revision Final

4. Brainstorming

1. Start with every example that strikes your topic

2. List them all3. Start grouping in logical categories

4. Brainstorming

Is Gertrude a good mother?

Topic

•Wants him to get out of his funk (1.2.68)•Unaware of Hamlet’s digs (1.2.75)•Wants him to stay at Elsinore (1.2.119)•More interested in R&G as Hamlet’s friends, not using him (2.2.19)•Diminishes “ov’r hasty marriage 2.2.56)•Wants to cut to the chase (2.2.97)•Want the extant reading (2.2.114)•Aware that he walks (2.2.161)•Wants the cause to be Ophelia (3.1.39)•Unaware of mirror in the play (3.2.210)•Polonius recognizes Gertrude as a buffer (3.4.1)•Gertrude unaware of Hamlet’s accusations (3.4.38)•Oblivious (3.4.50)•Understanding through her son (3.4.69)•Bothered by accusations (3.4.84; 181)•Looking for excuses (3.4.96; 127; 4.1.6))•Looks for advice (3.4.164)•Runs to Claudius (4.4)•Rats out Hamlet in favour of Claudius (4.5.124)•Helpful to other children: wants to listen to Ophelia to relieve her madness•Delivers news to Laertes that Ophelia is dead (4.7.134)•In the sword fight, Gertrude is on Hamlet’s side (5.2.230)

5. Outlining

Is Gertrude a good mother?

Topic

•Wants him to get out of his funk (1.2.68)•Unaware of Hamlet’s digs (1.2.75)•Wants him to stay at Elsinore (1.2.119)•More interested in R&G as Hamlet’s friends, not using him (2.2.19)

Evidence

Major Point 1

Major Point 3

Major Point 2

Thesis

Outline

Task #1:

In booklet, look at evidence. Break into three major points and put

these on the bubble sheet

6. Thesis

Concession-refutation: giving into the other sideExample: Although experts say that eating burnt

food can cause cancer, a child who refuses to eat a burnt marshmallow at summer camp could face more immediate consequences of social alienation.

Example: While Harlen may appear as a liar, he actually distinguishes between harmful lies and untruths that help people, justifying his transgressions of sincerity.

6. Thesis (cont’d)

Has to be an argument/angle of some kind Cannot just be a restatement or summary

of plot Can begin as a “working thesis” that

changes as you write the paper Comes as the last sentence of the first

paragraph (the introduction) Can include a path (the main major points

you will be making)

6. Thesis (cont’d)

Examples:

Although Rosencrantz and Guildenstern appear to be bad friends, they are loyal to Hamlet to the best of their knowledge and are merely pawns of Claudius.

While Horatio may seem more loyal than Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, he makes several moves against Hamlet that in some ways count him in the same “bad friend” category.

6. Thesis: Example

Task #2: Come up with a concession-refutation thesis for your bubble sheet based on your three major points.

7. Paragraph Mechanics

Is 6-12 sentences long—easy reading.

Begins with a topic sentence Is indented Expresses ONE idea Includes a transition Get away from the strictly five paragraphs!

7. The Perfect Paragraph

Topic Sentence

Topic Sentence

Point #3

Point #3

Point #2

Point #2

Point #1

Point #1

Concluding Sentence to Summarize and

Transition

Concluding Sentence to Summarize and

Transition

7. 4-F Test

FocusTopic Sentence

Fine PointsDetails

FlowTransitions

FinalityConcluding Sentence

Focus: The Topic Sentence

Is like a sequel in a movie. Looks in two directions: backwards (to the

thesis) and forwards (to the body of the paragraph).

Flow: Transitions: Adding ideas Also Finally As well as Too In addition Moreover Furthermore Another Again

Further First,

second …

Transitions: Showing Time

Later As soon

as Until First, last Until While Soon

Now Eventually To begin

with Afterwards Meanwhile During

Transitions: Showing Contrast But In contrast However Yet Despite Although On the other

hand

Even though Otherwise Conversely

Transitions: Showing Similarity Both Each Likewise Like Similarly Also Compared to

Transitions: Showing Cause and Effect As a result Consequently Therefore Thus Accordingly So To conclude

Hence For this

reason Then

List of Transitions

http://maclife.mcmaster.ca/CSD/accesstomac/images/common.pdf

Finality

Is the concluding sentence Restates the main point of the paragraph Transitions into the next paragraph.

Example of 4-F Paragraph

Watching the news before going to sleep can cause sleep disturbance or insomnia. The late-news is often filled with depressing events. As a result, an individual is put into a kind of stage of alert. Images, sounds, or phrases may remain in a person’s immediate consciousness, and therefore may plague the person as he or she tries to settle down and relax. Consequently, overstimulation and restlessness follow. Thus, a person becomes centred on worry and stress. Accordingly, the person becomes aroused rather than calmed into a state of sleep, so late-night news watching is not recommended.

Example of a 0-F Paragraph

Sports and fitness trends are related to what John Kelly, a University of Illinois sociologist, calls “the Olympic effect.” Since the Olympic Games get such an abundance of media coverage and promotion, adult viewers tend to participate more just before, during, and immediately after the Olympics. The Olympics occur every four years. After the Olympic flurry is over, participation in sports and fitness activities tends to spiral downward again, according to Dr. Kelly. However, casino gambling have increased since 2004.

7. Paragraph Mechanics

Choose one of your major points and make a topic sentence for it that relates back to the thesis.

As bullets, put three quotation citations underneath that topic sentence

8. Quote Integration: Step 1

Frame all quotes with your own writing Never drop a quotation as its own sentence Spend as much time or more explaining each

quote as the quote is longExample:Rosencrantz is no longer Hamlet’s friend by the

end of the play, as Rosencrantz keeps asking where Polonius’ body is buried. “What have you done, my lord, with the dead body?” Also “Tell us where ‘tis, that we may take it thence And bear it to the chapel.”

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are no longer Hamlet’s friends by the end of the play, as Rosencrantz keeps asking where Polonius’ body is buried. “What have you done, my lord, with the dead body?” Also “Tell us where ‘tis, that we may take it thence And bear it to the chapel.”

Rosencrantz demonstrates his disloyalty to Hamlet when he keeps asking Hamlet to tell him “what [he has] done . . . with the dead body,” not to help Hamlet but so that Rosencrantz can “take it thence and bear it to the chapel”—not likely a consideration of Hamlet’s.

Which one is easier to read?

8. Quotation Integration: Step 2 Change tense or pronouns from original

that do not mesh with your own framing text

Claudius explains that “I have sent to seek him, and to find the body” (4.3.1).

Claudius explains that he has “sent to seek [Hamlet], and to find the body” of Polonius (4.3.1).

8. Quotation Integration: Step 2 Use present tense for your own framing words

Example:

The closet scene involves both Gertrude and Hamlet in a heated debate.

Hamlet was mad because his mother married too quickly.

The scene set up the next act so the characters could enter from the side.

8. Number

The article begins with a quote from Lisa McFarren who states that “I’ve known many men to have a garage sale.”

The author explicitly states that “my field research indicates there is indeed a division of labour.”

8. Quote Integration: Step 3

Quote too long? Summarize (20% of original) Paraphrase (same length as original) Use ellipses (the dot-dot-dot)

8. Quotation Integration: Step 4Punctuation Must Be Correct

Only put a comma before the quote if it could be replaced with the word “that”

Commas and periods belong inside quotation marks if no bracketed citation

No single quotations—only doubles

8. Quotation Integration

On worksheet, fix poorly integrated quotations.

Put “OK” next to the ones that are OK

Taking Stock