1. Stages of Crisis Development Anxiety (Nox. event…emotional dysregulation Belligerent (Cognitive Dysregulation) Destructive Behavior (behavioral dysregulation)

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Stages of Crisis Development

Anxiety (Nox.

event…emotional dysregulation

Belligerent (Cognitive

Dysregulation)

Destructive Behavior (behavioral dysregulation)

Tension Reduction (Re-regulation via exhaustion)

Remorse (Shame)

David Wilmes, [email protected] 651-771-1301 based on CPI model

Conditions Associated with Increased Vulnerability to Behavior and Emotional Dysregulation Neurophysical irregularities and brain

chemistry e.g. Attention deficit disorder, Schizophrenia, Autism Spectrum Disorder, Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Effects, Bipolar Disorders, Lowered levels of Serotonin, overload of cortisol, Blood sugar irregularities

Intoxication from alcohol or other drugs Chronic exposure to trauma…or coping with

unmet basic needs (Survival Orientation)

Jane Gilgun Ph.D. University of MN, School of Social Work http://ssw.che.umn.edu/Faculty_Profiles/Gilgun_Jane/Gilgun_pubs.html

Growth versus Survival Mode Growth Mode: When environment

provides youth with basic needs, safety, and support for developmental growth.

Survival Mode: When environment is ambivalent to the needs of youth or withholds resources youth need for developmental growth.

4David Wilmes, [email protected] 651-771-1301

Chronic Trauma that Contributes to Survival Orientation Unreliable or absent parent/care-providers

Unresolved/Unprocessed loss Exposure to violence

Victim of violence, abuse, neglect Witnessing violence

Poverty/Unmet basic needs (food, shelter, clothing, etc.) Transience/ changing housing, schools, etc. Refugee status/ immigration to avoid persecution Living in a neighborhood that is dangerous …physically,

emotionally threatening. Being subjected to chronic racism …or bias based on

identity/personhood. (institutional or personal)


Survival Orientation

Adaptation to a challenging if not impossible situation…not a choice or decision.

Sometimes temporary and disappears with time and support…however, sometimes multi-generational.

Not likely to be black and white…present in degrees…and stronger in some areas than others.

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Survival Mode Assumptions Privileged Assumptions

Individual Needs First: Take what you want…or you won’t get what you need.

“The System” is corrupt and cannot be trusted or counted on.

Relationships: Relationships are used to get what you need or want…loyalty is extreme, but reserved for select friends/family. (Friends/family always backup in a dangerous situation.)

Choices based on…immediate outcome. Future is almost always uncertain.

Organization Skills: Organizing things, time, and processes is futile, because schedule and proximity is unpredictable.

External locus of control: Because environment is dangerous and unregulated. What others do or say dictates behavior. Therefore individual responsibility is not necessarily assumed

Respect (from others) is primal: Demanding respect from others is critical to not just esteem but also safety. If disrespect is tolerated….exploitation will follow.

Group/Individual Needs: There’s enough for all if we only take what we need.

“The System” generally works and can be trusted.

Relationships: Relationships are used as a demonstration of popularity..loyalty is less critical ….(Police are backup in a dangerous situation.)

Choices Based on Longer-term Outcomes: Future is predictable if we learn how to plan for it.

Organization Skills: Learning to keep track of things, time and processes is almost automated…However, boys generally develop the skill later than girls.

Internal locus of Control: Because most environments are regulated and monitored. Self-regulation skills are encouraged, supported and taught. Personal responsibility is generally assumed.

Respect based on internal Processes: Demanding respect not required…respect from others is assumed. Safety is based on a deep trust of the system as managed by others.


Inherent Strengths of Survival Based Orientation

• Youth develop 6th sense for interpreting non-verbal communication. (Reads people quickly and accurately)

• Youth develop uncanny ability to quickly interpret dangerous situations.

• Youth develops sense of resilience based on ability to do without.

• Ability to perform under pressure can be enhanced. (for some)

• Youth develops strong sense of loyalty to people they trust.

• Youth have capacity for exceptional strength, passion, courage.

• Often provides solid foundation for entrepreneurial and negotiating skills.

David Wilmes, [email protected] 651-771-1301

Challenges of Survival Orientation

• Privileged Public often sees survival-based clients either as deserving pity…or as threatening and intimidating…or lazy. (rescue the children, lock up the teens, punish the parents,) Compassion to Fear to Disgust.

• Trust is black or white, trusts some too much and others too little…challenges with regulating degrees of trust.

• Decision making focuses primarily on short-term payoffs.

• Organization skills are frequently thwarted. (especially with males)

• Perceived disrespect from others often results in escalating conflicts….sometimes resulting in violence.

• Posturing results in youth feeling he/she has no choice but to “act out” to maintain identity.

• External locus of control thwarts development of self-regulation skills and positive identity formation.


Middle School Identity Options: as Reported by a Young African-American Male in St. Paul Dope Boy Thug Gangster Athlete Playboy Book-Kid (Smart Boy)

David Wilmes, Donnie Preston [email protected] 651-771-1301

Office Referrals by Race

Total Population

Total Num. of referrals

Rate of Referrals per Student

Asian 128 30 .2

White 257 147 .6

Native Am. 11 17 1.5

Hisp./Lat. 66 127 1.9

Black/Afr. Am. 280 998 3.6

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Referral GroupsNumber of Referrals Number of Students

in GroupPercentage of total student group

0 to 1 571 77%

2 to 5 96 13%

6 or more 78 10.5%

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Likelihood of being in “6 or More” Group….by Race

N in the group of “6 or more”

Likelihood of a student of this race being in the “6 or more”

Asian 1 .8 % or roughly 1 in 120

White 4 1.6% or roughly 1 in 62

Hisp/Latino 7 10.6% or roughly 1 in 9

Black/Af. Am.

66 23.6% or roughly 1 in 4.3

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Survival Mode Beliefs About Respect Disrespect fueled by “I won’t give it if I

don’t get it”…If they don’t respect me, then why should I give them respect.

Escalating violence fueled by “If someone disrespects you then you have the right (and responsibility) to demand they show you respect using whatever means needed.”


Escalating Disrespect

From Adults Perspective:

They don’t like me.They think they’re

in charge.They’re

encouraging others to join in.

If I let this happen, then…I don’t know what will be next.

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From Youth Perspective:– She doesn’t like me.

– She’s disrespecting me.

– She’s treating me like I’m nothing. (trash, punk, baby, etc…)

– They need to learn I’m somebody.

– I’ll teach them…(and prove to my friends) I can’t be disrespected this way.


Survival Mode Students…Leading to Power Struggles with Staff

Examples that I know “hook me” in:__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________


Family Power Struggles

Power Struggles with Racial Overtones

I can’t.

I won’t.

I don’t have to.

You can’t make me!

Vulgar language….tantrums.

Threats to parent, the house or self.

I’ll show you…. follow-through on threats.

I’ll call child protection.

I don’t know what she wants. (Directive is confusing, unclear, ambiguous, or beyond youth’s ability)

What she expects isn’t fair. ( directive perceived as disrespectful, shameful or laced with personal judgment about youth or their family)

Nobody here understands me or how I feel. (no-one in charge looks like me.)

Nobody will make me their punk. (Respect only comes from force….)

Racial/sexual name-calling (white b___, etc. )

I’ll get you….covert or overt threats. (If you don’t demand respect you won’t get it)

Follows through with threat, (immediate or later retribution)

I’ll call my people. (family, friends, etc.)


Power Struggle Outcomes

Youth from Privileged Mode

Youth from Survival Mode

Parents are Contacted School consequence Parent/system

collaboration Mental health

involvement Sanctions that lead to

behavioral redirection, mental health intervention.

School Suspension, expulsion

Police involvement Juvenile Detention Certification as an adult

(in legal system) Sanctions that lead to

expulsion, correctional intervention.

Youth can be killed (usually power struggles with peers)


Why Adults Escalate? We’ve let behavior norms become “too hot” We don’t see the early signs. We feel our authority is threatened. Power plays or disrespect create uncomfortable

or unpredictable emotions for us. Our style of behavior management is:

Authoritarian….resulting in kids feeling discounted.Permissive…kids push us to see how far they can

go.Disengaged…kids immediately take control of the

environment…we wait too long to engage.


From Power to Authority

Personal Power

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Control/Influence

Accountability

Responsibility

Authority

Growth

Social (peers)

Systems (adults)

Direction (adults)

Commitments


Anticipating Power Struggles Knowing the early signs of a Power Struggle:

Signs in us Signals from the young person (and knowing what's at

stake for the student) Exercising adult authority without challenging their newly

emerging power. (Authoritative Management) Teaching young people the link between power to make

choices and Potential outcomes. Learning takes place only in a de-escalated environment.

(When student has re-regulated) Allowing and engaging youth in honest conversation

regarding power (especially power associated with race, gender, class, etc.)

Target small behavioral issues…before they escalate. Never ignore thinking but use interventions that engage,


Adults who Escalate Often: Wait too long to intervene…tolerating too much,

leading into frequent escalations of big stuff. Feel insecure or unsure about their authority. Fail to understand youth’s need to maintain esteem

with peers…or try to “take the youth down a notch” with their peers or neighbors.

Non-verbal communication shows: Disrespect (Judging) Artificial Concern (touching or shows pity) Lack of acceptance (Scowling) Uses humor derisively (Humiliating)

Verbal communication is: Loud (intimidating) Threatening (Uses ultimatum) Racially offensive (Uses slang or nicknames inappropriately)


Adults who Defuse Power Struggles:

Have a large arsenal of low-level consequences or behavioral responses that work for them and their clients.

Have a persona that makes ALL students think they care…despite the fact that they have very firm expectations.

In conflict situations they: Remove audience Move back Get softer, quieter. Maintain contact without being close. Deal only in present reality (don’t get into past or future). Use their relationship with the youth to remind the youth of “their

better self” Focus on the immediate goal of safety Never make promises you cannot or will not keep.


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Authoritarian

Authoritative

Uninvolved

Permissive

Four Styles of

Adult Supervis

ion

Managing Environments


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Attachment

Autonomy

Expectations

Firmness

Conflict Style: Escalating Power Struggles

Provides Youth: Clear Direction, Unambiguous Rules

Perceived as: Brittle

World View: If we could only keep the troublemakers out of here…

Authoritarian Style


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Attachment

Autonomy

Expectations

Firmness

Conflict Style: Gives in

Provides Youth: Too much freedom

Perceived as: Naive

World View: Kids only need love…

Permissive Style


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Attachment

Autonomy

Expectations

Firmness

Conflict Style: Avoids conflict by ignoring

Provides Youth: No adult leadership or presence

Perceived as: Invisible

World View: I’ve only got 4 hours left to endure…

Uninvolved Style


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Attachment

Autonomy

Expectations

Firmness

Conflict Style: Conflict is a means of problem solving

Provides Youth: Direction, Support, and Structure

Perceived as: Authority figure, but fair and helpful

World View: Kids need adults….

Authoritative Style


Triangulated Environments


Where Am I?


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Early 8-12 Mid 13-16 Late 17-24 Achieving Autonomy

Est. Personal Power/Ego

Strength

Est. Identity Establish Independence

Primary Struggle

Power Struggles With Authority

Search For Identity Distinct from

Parents and Family

Quest For Financial, Emotional, And

Physical Independence.

Risk Evaluation

Evaluates Risk Based On Here

And Now

Evaluates Risk On Short-Term

Future

Evaluates Risk On Longer-Term

Future

Future??? 1-5 Days 1-12 Months 1 -3 Years

Moral Development

Fear Of Getting Caught. Avoiding

Neg. Consequences

Putting Self In Others Shoes, Not Wanting Others To

Be Hurt

Doing The Right Thing.

Decision Making

Personal Accountability

Choices Have Outcomes

Developing Empathy

Choices Effect Others

Developing Social Conscience Choices Make a

Difference

Brain Development Cognitive Functions

Fight/Flight

Cause & Effect Reasoning

Problem Analysis

Emotional Functions

Primary Emotions Amygdala

based…Fear, Anger, Sadness, Disgust, Joy

Secondary Emotions

Rooted in cognition…Anxiety,

Stress, Shyness

Intuition Automated logic based

on experience with analysis and secondary

emotions

Planning Functions

Impulsive: Based on immediate

primary emotions

Deliberate: Cognitive assessment

and emotional awareness intertwine

Strategic: Considers Long/short

term consequences coupled with intuition

The brain develops from back-to-front

How the Brain Develops:

Learning Experiences…Cause gray matter to thin when neurons fire forming new neural connections…Repetition

causes the connections that fire together will eventually wire together.

Brain Development Not Complete in Adolescence Prefrontal Cortex one of last parts of the

brain to fully mature. This part of the brain responsible for

“executive functioning”Decision makingPlanningJudgementExpression of emotionsImpulse control

Limbic System also under Construction This part of the brain is responsible for:

MotivationEmotionLearningMemory

Tightly connected to the prefrontal cortex…tied to mood swings and impulsiveness of adolescence.

Dopamine Production levels Shift Dopamine helps link actions to pleasure. Levels required for pleasure rise…

leading to boredom with previous activities

Leading adolescent to seek pleasure via increasingly risky behavior (sex, drugs, criminal activity, etc.)

NORMAL Adolescent Brain Dev. can lead to assumptions…

No motivation to learn, No ability to control her/his impulses, An addiction to superficial excitement and

stimulation, No capacity to focus his/her attention (other

than on video games and girl/boyfriends) No ability to think about longer-term goals

and objectives.

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Authority Issues…Growth Mode Staff and Survival Based Students Positional authority is not respected by survival

based students or parent…authority based on relationship is.

Being labeled a trouble maker is badge of honor for the student…and sometimes the parent.

“Getting one over” is validation of outsmarting the system…and therefor an indicator of power.

Active display of disrespect (to traditional authority and certain peers) is a means of demonstrating power, status, and demanding respect from others.

Compliance undermines “street credibility” often viewed as lacking authenticity, heart, or courage…or being “white”.

Using Behavior as a Teachable Moment Assumes:

Relationship/Connection

Kids believe we care about them

We understand misbehavior

We’re confident of our selves and our authority

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What does it look like?

•

•

•

•


Adult Responses to Student Behavior Internalizing Student’s Behavior

happens when we feel student’s behavior is about us, directed at us, or because of us.

Responding to Student’s Behavior is possible when we realize that most student behavior reflects something about the student. We are then able to choose our response based on what's best for the student and/or the situation.


Misbehavior is an opportunity to teach

Internalizing Versus Responding to Student’s Problem Behavior Responding to

Behavior: Ignore Mark Re-direct Intervene Interfere

Internalizing Behavior: Worry/Fear Anxiety (chronic worry) Self Doubt Anger Intolerance/Rejection


Levels of Behavioral Response

IgnoringIgnoring Goal of the behavior is to “get us Goal of the behavior is to “get us going”going”

MarkingMarking Behavior can’t be ignored…but Behavior can’t be ignored…but timing or situation are not timing or situation are not appropriate.appropriate.

RedirectingRedirecting Shifting attention or activity to Shifting attention or activity to something more positivesomething more positive

InterveneIntervene DESI: Describe behavior, DESI: Describe behavior, Express Concern, Suggest, Express Concern, Suggest, Involve. Involve.

InterfereInterfere When behavior is dangerous to When behavior is dangerous to self, environment, or others.self, environment, or others.


Responding to Charged Behavior

DESI MessageNegative Behavior

Dee MessagePositive Behavior

Describe the behavior

Express your concern

Suggest alternative behavior

Involve yourself.

Describe the positive behavior.

Express your appreciation

Encourage to continue


Consequences versus Punishment Educational Timely Challenge (but not defeat) Logical Consistent Escalating Presented Calmly


Consequences What they are:

Teaching basics of right and wrong.Gives youth the incentive to do well.Interrupts patterns of problem behavior.Educates as to the outcome of behavior.

Impact on change:More effective (than punishment) at providing insight

to move from pre-contemplation to contemplation. Survival-based youth greatly benefit from adult assistance and cultural support to avoid personalizing consequences.

Can provide impetus to move from contemplation to preparation….but not likely without previous knowledge or adult support.

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Stages of Change

Pre-contemplation Not Aware of the problem …

Contemplation Aware of problem, but “on the fence” … Questions focus on What? and Should/can I?

Preparation Intending, planning to Act …Questions focus on How?

Action Experimenting with a new behavior

Practice Modification of new behavior

Maintenance Success, regress, readjust, success…

Prochaska JO, DiClemente CC, Norcross JC. .

Initial Motivation (From pre-contemplation to Contemplation)

Fallacy of believing we can motivate Identifying initial motivators:

○ Not wanting to lose…○ Wanting to keep…○ Sick and Tired of…○ Afraid that…

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Getting Ready (From Contemplation to Preparation)

Emotional conditions Required for Preparation…

Relationship conditions required for Preparation….

“Chunking it Down”…helping build steps for change.

Keeping it small…one step at a time…and allow for incremental change

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Action (From preparation to Action)

Remembering motivation…why am I really doing this, and for whom?

Focus and time. What am I working on this week, (is it visible to others or only me.)

Tracking. (How do I know I’m doing it?...and where’s the record.)

Rewards…why am I doing this again??? What will work for me?

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Practice and Maintenance When do I review and with whom? Who should I tell and when? How perfect should I be

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Oppositional/Anti-Social Behavior Continuum Lethal activity to self or others Firing Gun on school property Stabbing (non-fatal) Hate Crime Sexual Assault Assaulting a Staff Member Fighting (with a weapon) Intimidating (with a weapon) Threatening a Staff Member Extortion/Stalking Theft/Vandalism Cursing at authority figure Fighting (without a weapon) Sexual, Racial, or Religious Harassment Pulling, Grabbing, Ripping Clothing Taunting, Verbal Intimidation (peers) Threats to peers Slapping, Pushing, Hitting, Spitting Running in halls Refusing to stay in seat Vulgar language Fake fighting Violating classroom rules Defying authority Rumors, Gossip Escalating arguments Teasing/put downs (peers) Inappropriate gesturing Throwing objects Distracting others Not listening Interrupting others Not following directions Uninvolved (off-task) Late for class Unprepared for class/activity

Oppositional Behavior

Distracting Behavior

Anti-Social Behavior

Quick Lessons…About Escalating Continuums• Limits predict actual behavior.

• If we don’t sweat the “small stuff”…small behaviors quickly escalate into “big stuff”

• Adults who can’t differentiate between the “right small stuff” and “picky stuff”…get caught in non-ending power struggles.

• Choose your battles. (time, place, setting, and issue.)…when you choose to engage...you have to be able to follow through…some situations are “no-win” situations.

• Consequences interrupt behavior, but are not enough to change or teach new behavior.


Focusing on the Right Stuff

Picky Stuff•Focuses on pet peeves, Not necessarily related to the class or group objectives

•Often confused by students as being tied to identity.

•The question of “why?” is complicated, confusing, or answerable only by “I say so!”.

•Sometimes considered as a “personal crusade” against a particular behavior.

The Right Stuff•Focuses on the behavior required for the class to function.

•Important for others to be successful.

•Important for safety.

•The question of “why?” is easily answered.

•Something that the building staff have agreed to focus on.


Limits/Expectations Behavior Specific Enforceable Pro-Active, Always target Safe Levels of Behavior Linked to the Goals of the class Limited in Number (Guideline based…with details

discussed, modified, demonstrated, and or displayed. Respect for Self and OthersRespect for Building and EquipmentRespect for My Work and the Work of Others


Proactive Limits Provide the Structure for Classroom Proficiency

What does it look like to respect self and others?

What does it look like to respect building and equipment?

What does it look like to respect the mission of this class? (Respect for what is being taught respect for how it is being taught and respect for how others learn.)

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Routines They guide behavior that is associated with

beginning, middle and ends of an event: Entering class….behavioral speed bumps First 5 minutes of class…reengagement. Next xx minutes…work phase. Final 5-10 minutes…closure phase.

They cover the basic responsibilities you consider essential for your class to engage in instruction.

Knowing the routines provides students with structure to focus.

Knowing how to participate and be successful with the routines of the class provides youth with security for risk taking.


Rituals Rituals create the foundation for meaning and attachment Endorsed by Peers Event/Action Oriented (Participation Based) Based on Identity, Definition of “Home”

It’s Who We AreIt’s What We do Here

Consequences Are Peer Led Schedule Driven (daily, weekly, monthly, annual, or special) Positive Rituals:

Reinforce Pro-Social BehaviorBuild Group CohesionWelcome New Members

Rituals often include one or more of, fun, food, recognition, ceremony, symbolism


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Collaborative Problem Solving What it is?

Teaches new patterns of behaviorHelps understand roadblocks/barriers to new behaviorDevelops relationships that instruct, reinforce, and coach

how to do new behavior. Impact on Change

Assumes the youth is at least in contemplation stage …and ready to move to “preparation” stage of change.

Provides the skills, instruction, support, for completion of preparation and movement into action, practice and maintenance stages of change.

Collaborative Problem Solving Empathy

We demonstrate that we are interested in understanding the person behind the behavior. (hearing the students perspective)

Defining the problem (Help student understand):○ Precursors of the behavior (e.g. When someone disagrees with you)

○ Context of the behavior (e.g. How it fits in with friends, family.)

○ Pattern of the behavior (e.g. when your bored, tired, etc.)

Invitation to solve the problemChunking it downEstablish a time planCreate doable celebration points

Consequences vs. Problem Solving Consequences are essential to

INTERRUPT OLD patterns of behavior.

Collaborative Problem Solving is one of the best methods for TEACHING NEW behaviors.

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ClassRoom Insubordination Category Power group ranks:

Power Brokers (focus on no more than 2)Attention Seekers (Class clowns)Chorus (Audience for the class clowns)Struggling (Students with intrinsic

challenges)Eager Students (Students who are

interested in learning)

Step One: Prepare Yourself• Are you a good teacher or not…confront

your anxieties.• Get feedback from folks who really know.• Get backup…

– Describe the situation– Find out as much as you can about power

brokers, attention seekers, and vulnerable students.

– Develop a plan…– Articulate the plan, and prepare for support if

needed.

Step One: Engaging the Power Brokers Focus on them individually Understand their agenda State your agenda in clear non-

judgemental language Collaborative problem solve (lets make

a deal). Describe solution (deal) in very firm and

observable behavioral terms.

Step Two: Group Dynamics Redefining expectations (for the class) Giving concrete examples of what

works….and what doesn’t. (What success looks like.)

Anticipating, defusing, and defining expectations for the small stuff:

○ Pencil sharpener○ Bathroom needs○ Chatting○ Electronics

1. Stages of Crisis Development Anxiety (Nox. event…emotional dysregulation Belligerent (Cognitive Dysregulation) Destructive Behavior (behavioral dysregulation)

Documents

needs of youth

survival orientationunreliable

survival orientationadaptation

groupindividual needs

survival modegrowth

dangerous situation

dictates behavior

resources youth